Hi Marianne, any appearance of calm acceptance of Kash's situation on my part is just that - an appearance. Or perhaps I come across as calm because I'm worn out and tired. I sat in my car in my garage this afternoon and wailed and cried my eyes out. I suppose the other thing I've felt is a sense of [defeated] resignation. From all the reading I did immediately after the IMS mentioned adenoma, I was positive I knew what we were facing (although I was holding out hope I'd be wrong) and I knew what the treatment options were going to be - except for the radiosurgery instead of the longer regimen; that one I missed. I think though, that it's a testament to how articulately and accurately so many people on this website described their dogs' symptoms and journeys that I could see the same things in my own dog. Thanks to the wealth of information here, I can now do my best to focus on spending time in the present with Kashmir instead of frantically researching my options. You didn't have that option with Barkis, but thanks to you and all the other people who have contributed to K9C, people like me who come after you have that gift. I am very, very grateful.