Lena, Teacup Poodle w/ adrenal tumor - Lena is now an angel

[Joan2517]

Thanks, Judi...I know it just comes crashing down sometimes. This is where I am able to express how I feel. I know that all of you feel the same. It's comforting to know that I'm not alone, but sad at the same time.

[Joan2517]

Happy birthday, my little angel. I have put off posting all day, even though my first waking thought, and all others, was that you would have been 18 years old today! 18! If you had been the third child I always pretended you were, you would've been able to vote; maybe gone off to college; gotten married?

Another connection to you is gone. Monika came for the last time today to groom Sibbie. We are her only clients in Glen Cove and it is too much trouble to get here. I had hoped I could talk her out of it, but nope. I even told her we would drive to wherever she might be, but she said that wouldn't work. I have to wonder if she might have kept coming if it had been for you. I cried and hugged and kissed her goodbye. She would not look me in the eye, and hers were red, so I think it was a hard decision for her...a business one. I don't know what we will do now. Sibbie is not as good as you, and will not like someone new touching her.

Sometimes I think you're still here, and that you haven't left me. I call Sibbie by your name and get THOSE looks from whoever I'm talking to. I hug her and tell her I love her, but it's you I am thinking of...that makes me feel bad for her. I do love her...but it's not the same, and I feel guilty because I miss you so much, Lee. I will never stop missing or loving you. I know you are still here with me. I saw you in the clouds the other day while I was on the train, and I see the signs you send me.

You have always been, and will always be, my precious, my baby, my heart dog, my angel Lena...Mommy loves you always and forever.

[Harley PoMMom]

Oh Joan, I'm sorry this is late but I do want to join you in wishing precious Lena a Happy Birthday! Sending tons of huge and loving hugs your way. ♥♥♥

[Joan2517]

Thank you, Lori~

[Katy1]

Joan, I’m so sorry you are loosing your groomer. I consider our groomer as a part of the family—and probably you do too. To top it off—you are loosing another connection to your baby Lena. I do have to tell you, when Annie is not looking, I go to your albums and smile at the pics of Lena—she was indeed a beautiful little baby. Blessings and many hugs today. Karen

[Squirt's Mom]

A belated Birthday wish from us as well, Lena!

[Joan2517]

Lena, my precious angel...yesterday was four years since you've been gone. I've been crying since the holidays started, your favorite times, Thanksgiving and Christmas, cooking, shortbreads, company, presents...Daddy got me a beautiful 3-D crystal with the image of you sitting on the bed in Williamsburg, a young you. But I had already gotten myself one, one of my favorite pictures of you, an older you. The older you is more of what I remember...

I've been rereading this thread and remembering what those last days were like. You were so good through it all; you were so good always; you were such a good girl, Lena...the best. I know you hear me talking to you, either in my head or out loud sometimes. You are always in my thoughts, my darling girl, always...always and forever, my sweet angel.

Mommy loves you always and forever....

[Squirt's Mom]

I know she is watching over you and knows how much you miss her. One day we will get to hold our precious girls again and then we can tell them all the things we have wanted to for so long.

(((((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))))
Leslie

[Joan2517]

All I'll want to do is hold her and kiss her a million times, Leslie

[Remy’s Mom]

Joan my heart really goes out to you. You know Lena is always with you. I’m sure there are times when it’s a struggle as memories come popping up and it hurts so much. It was so sweet of you to remember me after all this time. I think I replied wrong to you and it didn’t get to you but I most certainly remember you and Lena and Sibbie. It may take me a few times to get all the posting/replying right. The memories you have of your baby are precious and I know she is right there loving you just as she always was!! Claire