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Thread: Apollo,missing you,1 year, 5 months

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  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2010
    San Diego, Ca

    Default Apollo,missing you,1 year, 5 months

    Dear Apollo
    It has taken me a while to write this to you.
    I came to this site to save you, I stay a while longer to save me. Every time I read we lost another baby , I cried, and thanked God it was not you. I dreaded when that day would come. Even when we would go to the park, people would say they never saw such a loving bond as was between us. I know you are still with me, because I wear the locket with your hair close to my heart and hold it often.
    When you died I stopped breathing. I'm still trying to breath.
    Doug said he didn't think he would have been as brave and strong as you were. You tried so hard for me.
    I have so much guilt and grief still. You ,not me were the teacher. I never had a dog before and it was you who taught me so much. Because of you I loved animals even more, tried to enjoy the moments, little joys. My vet said you were born an old man. All the vets and techs who took care of you said you were one of the best patients they had, so sweet and loving. August 24,2012, at the vet's when he said you were dying , it would not be long and he prayed I would not have to make that decision for you, he held you so loving in his arms and kissed your precious little head, while Doug and I were crying. Then on Sept 9th, 2012, I felt distressed all the day, decided to go over to Mom's. While she was holding you , you reached out with your head for me, I grabbed you as fast as I could and you let out your last breath. I screamed so loud and broke down.
    I went back on my notes and never realized how much you endured. I kept blaming myself for putting you on the Ivermectin, then the Advantage Plus, then so many antibiotics to try so hard to fix you, when I should have been trying to help you. All those drugs, with the TRilostane did not do you any good. And for months telling the vets there is something wrong with your intestines.
    My Cushing babies, you were not born with Cushing's. I feel the combination vaccines and so many of the drugs given disrupt your immune system. My sweet Apollo, I try to look at the loving and fun times we had. There were so many. You comforted me, loved me, made me laugh and yes cry and supported me. I would care for you again in a heart beat.
    Thank all of you for supporting me and not judging me.
    Hugs Sonja and Angel Apollo
    Last edited by apollo6; 01-25-2014 at 04:28 PM.

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