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Thread: Holidays can be hard...

  1. #391
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
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    Georgia
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    15,292

    Default Re: Holidays can be hard...

    Oh Dawn, it’s so good to see you back here and thank you so much for your Christmas wishes. Amidst the sorrows we share on this thread, that’s one of the great joys — seeing dear familiar faces reappearing during the holidays. It’s wonderful to hear from you, and I’m sending you my own best wishes for a new year that’s filled with fresh opportunities for new life and even perhaps new love. Thank you so much for stopping by!

    Marianne

  2. #392
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    Apr 2009
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    Georgia
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    Default Re: Holidays can be hard...

    Hey Kathy, keeping you in my thoughts and continuing to send hugs flying westward. I know how hard these days (and nights) must be for you. One day at a time. Heck, one hour at a time. Hang in there, girl — we’ve got your back.

  3. #393
    Join Date
    Mar 2013
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    California
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    4,435

    Default Re: Holidays can be hard...

    Thanks Marianne,

    EVERYTHING is really tough right now and there is no end in sight. I'm overwhelmed with responsibilites. So much to take care of. I can't sleep because my brain is on overdrive. I have had no chance to even address my grief and I'm running on fumes. What I'm able to eat, runs right through. On top of everything else, my mom was very religious, so there are funeral preparations and everything that has to do with that.

    I know that I will get it all sorted out. Thankfully, I have three weeks off before I need to return to work. That is quite a gift. 2 weeks of winter break, followed by a week of bereavement leave. I need to take two personal days once I return to work to attend my mom's funeral and visit the cemetary. I couldn't get it all taken care of during my break because the holidays push everything back. People need to spend time with their families, as they should.

    Thanks for checking on me. I am holding on by my fingernails.
    Kathy and Angel Buddy. The mightiest of all lizard hunters!

  4. #394
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    Apr 2009
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    Georgia
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    Default Re: Holidays can be hard...

    Thank goodness for those three weeks off, indeed! But so much stress packed into every moment has to be so hard. In the dead of one sleepless night last January while my mom was in hospice care, I got up and wrote on an index card in block letters: “YOU’LL GET HELP!” What that meant for me is that as soon as the immediate crisis had passed after her death, I started sessions with a grief therapist. I kept that little card propped next to my bed all during those initial dark January days, kind of as a lifeline. I knew I couldn’t handle things all by myself for long. But I did manage to get everything done that absolutely needed to be done during those first weeks. And then, finally I was able to take some time for myself. Even after a year, I still periodically schedule a therapy session. It remains a process, with no quick and easy relief. But enlisting help *has* been a help.

    So this is my wish for you — that there’ll be a resource that you can turn to, as well, once things settle down a bit. I don’t know exactly who or what that may be for you. But you deserve to be helped and supported, and that will be my New Year’s wish for you, Kathy. I wish for help to come your way, just as soon as you’re able to receive it. You shouldn’t have to keep handling things all by yourself, and I’ll be wishing you at least a bit of comfort and peace in the days ahead.

  5. #395
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    Apr 2009
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    Default Re: Holidays can be hard...

    Oh Kathy,

    I am so sorry, keeping you in my thoughts and prayers, sending huge and loving hugs.

  6. #396
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    Apr 2009
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    Georgia
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    Default Re: Holidays can be hard...

    Well, here it is New Year’s Eve 2019, and it’ll be another quiet evening at home for hubby, Luna, and me. We’re going to watch the Star Wars movies 7 and 8 on TV so that we’ll be all caught up to see the final Episode 9 in the theater. We saw 4, 5 and 6 as they were released; didn’t have as much interest in 1, 2 and 3 and can barely remember them. The original, episode 4, I’ll never forget. Hubby and I were just out of college and living in Los Angeles. We saw a trailer for this weird-looking sci-fi movie, and decided we’d brave the long, long line to see it as it premiered at the grand old Chinese Theater on Hollywood Boulevard. OMG, we couldn’t believe our eyes and ears! We’d never seen anything like it! We were young, and Luke and Leia were young, and what a blockbuster of a movie! I’ll never forget that evening in L.A. Welp, we’re no longer so young. ‘Nuff said, I guess... But we need to finish off the series, and tonight seems like a good time to coast toward the finale.

    Somehow I’m drawn to repeat something I posted five years ago on New Year’s Eve. Seems like only yesterday to me, but so many changes in my life since then. Anyway, here’s what I was thinking then, and the same holds true for me tonight. And I send my best wishes to all our K9C family for the new year to come.

    Quote Originally Posted by labblab View Post
    "Auld Lang Syne"...

    For the sake of old times.

    I don't know all the lyrics, but I surely do hum along with the music each and every New Year's Eve -- with a lump in my throat and a tear in my eye. What a privilege to have shared my life with my loved ones, human and four-legged, physically still present or here with me in spirit alone.

    Cheers to the old times, and Cheers to the new times that still await us. May the New Year bring a measure of comfort and peace to all our family.

  7. #397
    Join Date
    Jun 2013
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    Canada
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    Default Re: Holidays can be hard...

    Kathy, I am so sorry to read the news of your Mom. I was on yesterday quickly to send greetings and totally missed this thread about your Mom. My deepest condolences and sympathy for you and your Dad especially this time of year. Sometimes we wonder just how much more we can take, yet somehow we hang in there, undoubtedly at times just barely, but we do. The strength that we plod on with blows your mind at times yet we continue on. Please know that you are in my thoughts for sure. I am heading to a funeral tomorrow of a very dear lady that I had known all my life. She passed away December 19th but they waited till all the hoopla of the holidays was over before honouring her at her "homecoming" tomorrow. I will be thinking of you and your family especially tomorrow. You can do this.... and like Marianne said... "we got your back."
    Judi & "mah boy" Keesh

  8. #398
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
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    rural central ARK
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    14,549

    Default Re: Holidays can be hard...

    My youngest grandson, 14, has been with me this week and that has brought a depth of joy that otherwise would not have been present this time of year. We both wanted the Disney+ channel added to our streaming services so I got it and we have been watching the Star Wars movies in chronological order for the last couple of days. It will be odd to go back in time and see episode 4, 5, and 6 but we almost there! I made the comment that I had forgotten how wonderful the graphics were when we watched episode 1 and he just roared with laughter over the fact that I thought THOSE were great graphics! "Just wait, Mimi! You will be REALLY amazed!" And I probably will be. LOL It's been fun to have him with me to share these movies and talk about what great imagination it took to create the scenes, props, costumes and effects.

    A few of you will remember when I told about my Christmas tree and all the ornaments my daughter and I collected over the decades. They are each a priceless treasure to me but my family is not a very sentimental bunch and I know all these treasures will end up in the dumb when I am gone. So this year I tried to get the boys to come pick out the ones they wanted to keep. The oldest, 18, is much too busy for such nonsense, LOL, so he has left his choices to me. But the youngest has been selecting which ones he wants to have for his own tree some day and I have been carefully dividing and packing these treasures up for him and his brother. There will be a some "ordinary" ones left to put on a much, much smaller tree should I decide I want to in the future but this will be the last year I put all those treasures on a tree. It is bittersweet to say the least. I admit, some of the wrappings and boxes have gotten a bit soggy with tears in the process. But I pray my boys will one day unwrap and unbox them and remember with fondness when they saw them sparkling on my trees thru the years and find a bit of the joy in them they brought me and their mom, delicate reminders of two people who loved them more than anything else in this world.

    As I grow older I realize more and more the old adage that we can't go home again is so very true. Not only about our childhood but about every moment that comes. It is here once and once only so we need to make the most of each that we can. So, "for the sake of old times" and the new times to come, I wish each and everyone a new year filled with priceless blessings beyond counting,
    "May you know that absence is full of tender presence and that nothing is ever lost or forgotten." John O'Donahue, "Eternal Echoes"

    Death is not a changing of worlds as most imagine, as much as the walls of this world infinitely expanding.

  9. #399
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    Apr 2009
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    Georgia
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    Default Re: Holidays can be hard...

    Dearest Leslie, I will never forget reading your story about Gia and the ornaments on your glass tree. I will continue to picture your tree in my own mind during each Christmas to come. You are so right about treasuring each moment as it is granted to us. Sadly, we can’t ever, ever truly go back in time. But during a very few special moments in my life, I’ve felt as though the past and present have kind of merged into a magical unison. Such rare fleeting moments, but magical and special. Almost as though a memory did regain life for just an instant. Maybe that’s why I hold my memories so dear — not knowing whether I might feel that magic ever again, but hoping. If there truly is such a thing, I wish it to happen for you and for whatever memories you hold most dear. I’m guessing your glass tree may be one of them.

    Happy New Year, my friend. Happy. New. Year.

    With much love,
    Marianne

  10. #400
    Join Date
    Jan 2016
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    Glen Cove, NY
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    1,941

    Default Re: Holidays can be hard...

    Happy New Year to all!

    I've been passing ornaments on to my son the past few years. He's a huge Disney fan, in fact he is leaving tomorrow morning for a week long visit. I've given him all of my old Disney ones, but he always brings me one back from his trips! I have so many ornaments, but the trees have gotten smaller so I can't put them all up...and I don't have the energy or time anymore. It's turning into more of a memorial tree anyway. Lena's ornaments still go on along with all the dogs, past and still here. I dread putting it up each year, lugging the boxes out of the attic, the mess, going through them and deciding which ones to hang, then lugging the boxes back up to the attic. UGH!

    But once it's finished I truly enjoy looking at it. Lena used to love when I would pick her up and let her "help", and she and I would gaze at it for hours! A Facebook memory came up the other day with two pictures, one of Lena looking at me while she sat on the arm of the couch in front of the tree, and the other of Gable with his head on the arm of the couch looking at the tree. They both looked so healthy. A weird coincidence considering they both were diagnosed with Cushing's...one gone and Gable still fighting it.

    We toned down the Xmas gatherings this year, too. My sister could only come in the early afternoon as she had to be back home for the four hours in between my mother's caretakers. So we did an early cocktail party for her family, then just our family for the eve, and back again for presents and dinner on Christmas Day....still a lot of work though.

    Every year I say I'm going to start earlier and be ready and every year I'm more and more behind!

    But next year I am definitely going to be ready!
    Joan, mom to my Angel Lena, Angel Gable, Angel Phoenix, Angel Doree, Cooper, Sibble, and now Raina.

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