I think going with the flow is an excellent strategy. As well as not dwelling on the painful thoughts. They will come up on their own, but the trick is to release them on their own, too. At least, for me, that is the trick. Not to latch onto the thought and the pain and hold on and hold on and hold on. Like endlessly rubbing a sore in your mouth with your tongue.
There is a phrase my husband and I both use in relation to playing instruments (for me it is keyboard, for him it is stringed instruments). The phrase is "muscle memory." It always seems like a bit of a miracle to me when I memorize a song and can play it effortlessly without the music. But we call that "muscle memory" -- when the notes become physically encoded in some way and our fingers just know automatically what to do. The truly odd thing is that when I use my brain again and start thinking about what I'm playing, the whole thing usually falls apart. The brain consciousness overrides the physical consciousness and short-circuits everything.
I am really good at letting my brain short-circuit things.
So I will project my own self onto you, and tell you that I think going with the flow is an excellent idea. Let your body and your heart lead you through the holidays. Who knows, you may end up heading off in a surprising direction by trying something new or by repeating something old that still ends up feeling comfortable after all.
Carpe diem. Savor the moment. Isn't that what our puppies lived by? Of all the life lessons they could teach us, I sure hope I can grasp that one before it is too late.
And absolutely, firsts are d**n hard.
Marianne