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Thread: Trinket-our little bauble! has crossed The Bridge

  1. #871
    Join Date
    Jan 2016
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    Glen Cove, NY
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    1,941

    Default Re: Trinket-our little bauble! has crossed The Bridge

    That is just heartbreaking, Leslie...you did everything you could with what you knew. If only our babies could talk and tell us what they are feeling.
    Joan, mom to my Angel Lena, Angel Gable, Angel Phoenix, Angel Doree, Cooper, Sibble, and now Raina.

  2. #872
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
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    Canada
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    Default Re: Trinket-our little bauble! has crossed The Bridge

    Oh leslie. I don't even know what to say other than no mater who Trinket was feeling, I would put money on her wanting to spend as long with you as she could. What a wonderful bond you two had. Hold that close to your heart when the despair wants to rush in. We love you!
    Sharlene and the late great diva - Molly muffin (always missed and never forgotten)

  3. #873
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Georgia
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    15,292

    Default Re: Trinket-our little bauble! has crossed The Bridge

    Dear Leslie, you and Trink have never been far from my mind during these past few days, even as I've struggled to find the words I wanted to say. Without a doubt, I feel as though I understand your horror over discovering what was ailing Trink and the pain it likely caused. So I can also easily imagine all the recrimination and self-doubt that you may be feeling, yourself.

    There is likely nothing I can say to change your feelings about this, but I still want to write out one very important fact: There was no way you could have known what was ailing her. The vets didn't know, and you didn't know. And so nature took it's course in due time, just as it does for every wild animal who has no hospital to turn to. One enormous difference from life in the wild, though, is that Trink had YOU alongside her, loving her and doing your best to comfort her, every step of the way and every moment until her body turned off and her spirit was released. You remained beloved companions throughout it all. She was never alone and she was always held and cherished in soothing hands.

    Please, please try to be kind to yourself, Leslie, and do not blame yourself for not knowing what was unknowable. What we do know is how lucky you and Trink were to have one another and to love one another. And nothing that has happened will ever change that.

    Sending so many loving hugs to you, myself.

  4. #874
    Join Date
    Mar 2013
    Location
    California
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    4,435

    Default Re: Trinket-our little bauble! has crossed The Bridge

    Awwww Leslie. The bottom line is that you didn't know. Nobody did. Not even the doctors. I realize that this isn't going to help you feel any better, but you loved her like no other and she knew that. You did everything humanely possible with the knowledge you had at the time. That's all any of us can do for our babies.

    I am so very sorry that this happened and wish I could say write something that would ease your pain, but only time can do that. Know that we are here for you. ooooo

    Kathy
    Kathy and Angel Buddy. The mightiest of all lizard hunters!

  5. #875
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    York, PA.
    Posts
    11,036

    Default Re: Trinket-our little bauble! has crossed The Bridge

    Oh Leslie,

    There is absolutely no reasons in the world for you to feel any guilt, you went above and beyond to make Trink better. Please, please stop being so hard on yourself, we love you, Leslie.

  6. #876
    Join Date
    Nov 2012
    Location
    Canada
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    706

    Default Re: Trinket-our little bauble! has crossed The Bridge

    Dear Leslie, you and Trink have been on my mind so much over the last days. I so want to be able to say something which will take the pain away, but I know that isn't possible. However please do not feel guilty because you did everything you possibly could, more even, yet you couldn't have known what was happening.

  7. #877
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Location
    rural central ARK
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    14,549

    Default Re: Trinket-our little bauble! has crossed The Bridge

    In addition to struggling with her last days, like too many times before I find so very much has abruptly changed since my itty bitty girl left.

    Mealtimes go so fast. No schedule to keep. No food to weigh and cook or thaw and warm. No pills and capsules to wrap and hide. No powders to measure, no drops to dole out. No cues to give so the blind can find their spots. No one to lead Barkfest.

    Poop patrol continues but the orange leaves fool me over and over because they look so much like her poop while eating her sweet potato strong diet. And not finding her poop still leads my mind to start preparing to clean out her pouch. But then I remember she doesn’t have to put up with that now…. then I can’t see the orange leaves any longer.

    My bed holds only me at bedtime for the first time since the ‘70’s. There is no comforting body pressed to mine. Those spots where my daughter lay in her infancy and throughout her childhood, where each cat and dog lay are now cold when my hands and feet quest out for those still-familiar warmths. The covers are unpinned, my feet and legs free to move as they wish. I don’t think there will be any others to sleep with me. It’s just too painful when their spot grows cold.

    Candles, incense, air fresheners, etc. are no longer restricted but I’ve grown accustomed to our unique scent.

    Furniture and other items can be moved around now….everyone here can see where those things are at all times. But old habits are hard to break.

    Thank you all for your comments. They mean the world to me. I’m taking time to heal a little bit and work thru some things.
    "May you know that absence is full of tender presence and that nothing is ever lost or forgotten." John O'Donahue, "Eternal Echoes"

    Death is not a changing of worlds as most imagine, as much as the walls of this world infinitely expanding.

  8. #878
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Georgia
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    15,292

    Default Re: Trinket-our little bauble! has crossed The Bridge

    Les, thank you for returning to check in with us. You, and Trink, are missed so very much.

    Wishing so much I could throw my arms around you. Wishing so much I could help fill the void and ease some of the pain. Please just know how much you are loved and how dearly little Trink will be remembered.

    Sending prayers for peace and comfort flying to your home and heart, my friend.

  9. #879
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Location
    Canada
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    16,150

    Default Re: Trinket-our little bauble! has crossed The Bridge

    Wait, isn't Bud sleeping with you? Did I miss something there?

    Oh Leslie, I wish I too could give you a big hug and tell you that you aren't alone. Love you!
    Sharlene and the late great diva - Molly muffin (always missed and never forgotten)

  10. #880
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Location
    rural central ARK
    Posts
    14,549

    Default Re: Trinket-our little bauble! has crossed The Bridge

    It's been almost a month since my itty bitty girl left. We (Sophie, Fox, Bud, and I) are trying to adjust to our new norm. For the first week+ we had two house guests who came with a whole host of new "adventures" that kept us hopping but they have gone home now and it's just us - the "us" that will be for a while....but us' always change. So we are trying to settle in and create a space that is ours. These new spaces seem to hold as many memories and "ghosts" as they do the tangible....maybe more.

    Trink's death seems to be having a cathartic affect in my world. Many of the deaths in my life have (my daughter and dad) but Squirt and Trink in particular have had/are having a profound affect. Much is still dark to me but the light is there as well and it is growing. I don't know what tomorrow will bring but I know I won't face it alone, my babies are always around me.

    Sharlene, Bud did sleep with me when he first came but he sheds horribly plus he got to be a bed hog and I can't fight him all night for the edge of the bed. He has a large crate which he actually likes so he sleeps there now. When I wake up he comes and gets in bed with me while I drink my coffee and watch the morning news. Then again at bedtime he lays with me until it's time to go to sleep, usually around 9. The day he gets groomed I sometimes let him stay in bed that night because he's not filling my mouth with dog hair but that doesn't last long.
    "May you know that absence is full of tender presence and that nothing is ever lost or forgotten." John O'Donahue, "Eternal Echoes"

    Death is not a changing of worlds as most imagine, as much as the walls of this world infinitely expanding.

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