Thanks, I needed that.Quote:
Originally Posted by Harley PoMMom
Printable View
Thanks, I needed that.Quote:
Originally Posted by Harley PoMMom
Thank you~Quote:
Originally Posted by Whiskey's Mom
Thanks, Renee...I feel better today, but yesterday was non-stop tears. I can't believe I can still cry...it's like a dam opens up and I'm a mess.Quote:
Originally Posted by Renee
Yes of course you cry. I would be doing the same. We just miss them so darn much. :(
HUGS
Putting this here so I don't lose it, Lena...I miss you every day and really want to believe this...
A Dogs Message from Heaven
I am sending you this message as I can see you are still having struggles with coping each day since my passing.
You may walk in darkness and your heart is broken with my absence. I haven't left you as you hold me in your heart. Please don't be sad as the light will come shinning through for you. For each day of sunshine, think of it as reminder of me beaming down on you. Be happy that I am no longer in pain from sickness. I don't want you grieving for me for long as it makes me sad to see you in so much hurt. Don't dwell on the guilt you feel for making decisions we both know you had to do and I thank you for releasing me of my sickness.
Cry if you need to, miss me if you must, but don't worry about me, I'm in a place I love.
Yesterday I talked with the Creator and he said you'd come one day. I wanted you to know this. So you see I'm happy and I am free. There's nothing to worry me. Dry your eyes and make plans to see me again. I will look for you and when you get here, you will see what a wonderful place this is.
Let me tell you what it's like here in this wonderful place. There are no clouds or dreary rain…Just lot of blue sky and sunshine casted on us from His most gracious presence. There are miles of green grassy fields and meadows of beautiful flowers.
There are no cruel humans to hurt us, just the keepers who have been specially chosen to care for us...
We all get along here large and small. Some of us had a pretty rough life while others were very spoiled. We run and play tag or chase balls. We can be lazy as we want and take long naps. The Creator checks on us each day.
I have met many of your friend’s fur kids here.
There is never a sad moment. Just so much to keep busy....We get a lot of new kids arriving daily and is fun to show them the ropes here.
We are here waiting here for you when your purpose on Earth is complete. My wish for you is to be happy for me and not sad. It will be the most happiest of reunions and I will lick away all your tears. There will be nothing but good times for ever and ever.
I will let you feel my presence if you will just have faith and allow it to happen.
When the time is right, and it will come, I want you to take in another fur kid to care for just as you cared for me and protected me from all harm and gave me the security that I needed all those years. They deserve the life I had with you. Don't think of it as replacing me but giving another the love you have inside you to bring joy to another. I felt honored to a part of your life and you gave me so much of yourself.... That will always be special.
You were my life and I will always love you for that.
I am not that far away and I will be close to you in spirit and will remain in your heart. That is the bond that connects us. Do not think of me when I was at my worst but all the great memories we shared together. I hate to see you cry. I am happy here so be glad for me.
I want to be remembered for all the silly things I did and things we did together. We had some great times together.... So cherish those memories.
So my best friend, until your task on Earth is finished, take care of yourself and help another less fortunate kid to know the love I shared with you and you will be forever rewarded. You will know when the time is right.
Love you Forever,
Your 4 legged soul-mate, Lena.
Author...Kay Faulkner
I agree Joan, it's just beautiful. :)
I know how you feel , its been 8 months and I still cry for my Bandit, he was the furbaby of my heart. I know I will never forget him and I know he will always be in my heart. I found a camera the other day and charged it and saw so many pictures of my baby I had forgotten about, it was a bittersweet moment brought tears and laughter. I still think of him everyday.
Yes, I know...I go back and search through all of my pictures in the computers just to catch a glimpse of her in any of them. Today is 30 weeks and Monday will be 7 months and I just can't believe it still. It feels like forever to me...in my mind I can smile at the memories, but to speak about them to anyone will bring on the tears that just won't stop.
Sibbie and the boys keep me distracted most of the time. I know I've mentioned my concern that Gabe might have Cushing's, but I had him at the vet on this past Monday and they did blood work and everything came back perfect, except for his thyroid levels which were low normal. So we will test that again in 6 weeks. So I think he must still be grieving for Lee, which I find strange, unless he just picks up on me still being sad. I don't know, but at least I don't have to worry about Cushing's at this time.
And Sibbie is a joy! So full of fun and life...she keeps us all on our toes and is turning into such a lovely girl. Different than Lena in so many ways, but every once in a while does something just like her. Monday after I got back from the vet with Gable, she wanted to be held, which she usually doesn't, but I stood in the gazebo, looking out over the garden with her in my arms for almost an hour...something Lee always wanted me to do. Every time I tried to put her down, she wanted up again.
I think Bandit must have made you charge up the camera so you could see him. I hope Betty and Sammy are helping you and I think of you often and look for you on the forum.
Joan
I did the exact same thing with my three boys, and every once in a while I, too, take them out to touch them and I'm flooded with bittersweet memories.Quote:
Originally Posted by Joan2517
Sending huge and loving hugs to you, Joan.
The same huge and loving hugs to you, too...I'm relieved that I'm not the only one. After I posted I thought, "oh my, they're going to think I'm nuts!"Quote:
Originally Posted by Harley PoMMom
Not nuts at all joan. I clipped some of Mollys before we left and the vet clipped and braided some hair too and tied with a ribbon then into a blue silk bag. It is now in a silver box.
Awww, I wish I had thought of braiding...I didn't want to cut too much, I don't know why as it wouldn't have mattered.
Hi,
I am not on the forum much these days but wanted to stop by and offer a hug. I lost my little girl over two years ago, something has been missing in my life ever since.
There really aren't any wise words I can offer, we all seem to live through the loss and we all react differently.
The one thing I know for sure, without a doubt, is that everyone here understands and will offer support.
Thanks for all the support you have given to Sharlene too and all the others.
I admit to rambling a bit but really just wanted you to know that although we don't know each other, I do cares out your loss.
And I care about yours, too...and I don't think you're rambling. Sometimes we just need to spill it all out...and this is the place to go.
Two years, such a long time. I'm so sorry. I can't imagine my being without Lee for two years. It's only been seven months this coming Monday and it feels like forever to me.
This is the place to come and I think it's because of two major bonds here. One is that we who come here KNOW what it means to really and truly love an animal, to see our babies as part of our family and as our children. Two we can comprehend the depth of pain and agony when we lose a baby in a way most people never could; they aren't capable but we are because we are the blessed. In spite of that pain we will all face one day, we are the blessed.
Hugs,
Leslie and the gang
Absolutely, Leslie! And am so glad and feel so blessed to have found this forum...
My precious, Lee...seven months today. I avoided this all day, but here I am. I miss you all day, every single day. I may get busy doing other things, but you are always in my mind, always in my heart, and I am constantly looking for signs. I love you, Lena, always and forever. It's been so long, and I miss you so much.
I miss it all...the belly farts, dancing to the radio, sitting on the stoop watching the world go by, our trips to PA to visit Marie and Pop, waking me up in the morning licking my face and if I didn't move (even though I was awake) sticking your tongue up my nose, which you knew would do it! Wherever I was, knowing you were watching me. Looking back at pictures, if I was outside you were always at the door keeping your eyes on me.
I loved every second of having you in my life, my sweet little girl, every single second. And I miss you just as much, my precious angel child.
Love, Mommy
Missing you terribly today, Lee. I knocked a bottle off the counter the other night and it landed on my toe and smashed it. It's not broken, but looks disgusting...and I just lost it that night. I cried and screamed into my pillow for hours before I finally fell asleep...I think it has been building up in me for weeks and the pain in my toe just gave me permission to let it all out.
So the next day, not only did my toe hurt, but I had a splitting headache as well. I don't care, it felt good to scream and cry because in my head that's what I'm doing all the time anyway.
It's 32 weeks today and I have missed you every day, all day. You are my angel, my precious angel, and will always be. Mommy loves you, darling girl...and always will, my little Lena. I passed Safe Haven signs on my way to work this morning (I do every morning), but today I really noticed them. And it made me realize that you are in God's hands...that's what the picture on the sign is...a little baby's head resting in a hand...I think it was a sign from you to me, I hope it was.
Oh Joan, ouch. It's surprising sometimes what sets us off down that path of grief and pain. It's okay though, it's all normal.
I do just fine for quite a few days and then bham something will hit me in the heart and that is it till I get through it.
The good thing is that we have other wonderful things in our lives so that when those painful moments do hit us, we can get through them and focus once again on all the good things around us.
It sure does seem to come at the most unexpected times though.
I know...I had felt it coming, but just kept telling myself "not now".
Yesterday the grandsons were over and we started decorating for Halloween, that brought on tears. Lena loved Halloween! I have so many pictures of her in her Halloween t-shirt and posed in front of, or in the decorations. She would have been so happy to be outside with the boys, watching...so I did do some smiling.
But they had fun and I have bought Sibbie a couple of costumes. She does not like some of our decorations, though. My Josh is a ghoul and the scarier, the bloodier, the better...and she wound up barking at everything that she saw...I fear she will not like sitting on the stoop helping me hand out candy like Lena did!
I am glad you are keeping busy...it really does help. I hope Daniel is doing good, too~
Sending healing energy for your toe along with huge loving hugs for you.
Thanks~ It looks gross, but feels better :)
OUCH! Glad it feels better at least!
Another beautiful one from Leslie, Lena....
Guardian Angel of Pets
Hello. I've been expecting you for quite some time.
Here, come sit beside us for a while .
and let me tell you about this old friend of mine.
She might look tattered or maybe old
But I won't say goodbye until you've been told.
She had the brightest eyes I had ever seen,
And wore a beautiful fur coat that would out shine a queen .
She was never prissy but walked with an aire ......
And oh so polite, you could take her most anywhere.
She could run like the wind and could catch anything she chased
But she protected and sat with me when I had problems to face.
You could not find a friend nearly so dear.
Because no matter the trouble she always stayed near...
She has never asked for much from me;
Just to love and respect her and I think you'll agree .
To give her a good meal plus a nice warm bed is not much to ask
When she has given me all her love and to her this was no task.
Now I understand you have a schedule to keep.
But I have a small favor before she nods off to sleep.
Please fold your wings around her and let her feel young while in no pain.
Dear Guardian Angel of Pets,
please keep her safe and happy until I see her again.
By Ginger Patton
Today marks 8 months that you have been gone, Lee...such a very long time. I still think of you every day, my little angel child, and it still hurts...my heart actually hurts.
I saw something on Facebook about "A Goodbye Letter to My Human" and it was so touching, and of course I cried through it. I don't know how to post the link here.
An Iris started to grow a couple of weeks ago and just opened up. It is white with a hint of lavender. They shouldn't be growing now at all, so we named it Lena's Iris. It's down on the courtyard where you liked to take your morning garden strolls. I miss seeing you taking that walk with Doree following close behind. The two little girls exploring what must have seemed huge to the both of you. Doree walks it now with Sibbie following her, and annoying her. I can tell where they are by Doree's growling. I think Doree must miss you at those times. She won't cuddle up to Sibbie like she used to do with you. She might be lonely...Cooper is the only one who can sit next to her.
Yesterday I was laying on the couch and crying thinking of how much I miss you and that yesterday was 8 months since you were alive and the last day that you were home with us. And as I was crying, Gable who was sleeping on the floor next to me, started to dream and cry in his sleep...it was so weird. I don't know if he was picking up on my sadness, or if somehow he knew, and was sad also. He has aged so much since you left us, Lena.
And then Sibbie got off the chair she was on and came over and climbed up on the couch and wanted me to pet her while she stood on my chest and kissed me...so unlike her, but it made me smile through my tears.
I don't want to do anything today except think of you and look at all the pictures I have been finding and moving to a folder on my computer. I miss you so much, Lee. My heart is still shattered and won't go back together. I'm trying, but I can't get over your leaving me. I just never let myself think that it would happen, and now that it has, I can't accept it.
I love them all, and am trying to spend more time with them, so I might not have as many regrets. But I know we were together all the time. When you were a baby, me and Daddy took turns taking you with us when there were times you might be alone. I took you to work, he took you to the doctors or dentist; Jeremy was living home; you came to Williamsburg; to PA; all family get togethers. So I don't know why I feel like we didn't. Maybe because it just wasn't long enough...it could never be long enough. I miss seeing you first thing in the morning, first thing when I get home from work, and the last thing before I go to sleep.
I miss you constantly, my sweet, darling angel child. Mommy loves you forever, Lena....
Dear Joan, my heart breaks for you. I know how much you miss Lee. Thankfully you have so many wonderful memories with her. I love how you say She loved the holidays, Whiskey does too! When I tell non-dog people that they think I'm nuts. How sad for them.
I wish you peace and comfort.
Thank you...that is so sad for them. Besides children, there is no better feeling than watching our fur babies get into the holidays and enjoy them as much as we do. Does Whiskey dress up for Halloween?
Thinking of you Joan! Those moments that hit so profound can be really hard to get through.
HUGS
They are, Sharlene...sometimes I just can't believe how hard they hit. It's like a wave of sadness and rage comes over me. I've never felt like this before...maybe it's just because I'm getting old, and I thought she and I would spend our twilight years together. Of course, she would've had to live to be about 40 for that!
You were busy last night...I saw all your posts when I opened my computer a little while ago.
Another beautiful one from Leslie, Lee....
An Inseparable Pair
Anonymous
I miss you so much, my four-legged friend
I ask myself each day, if the pain will ever end
Your loss is so hard, for one person to bear
Because we were a team, an inseparable pair
You were by my side, when I got up each day
Waiting so patiently, to go out to play
You were there each night, when I got home
Waiting to go to the park, where you could roam
You always knew, if I was having a bad day
So you'd snuggle up close, and try to get me to play
If that didn't work, you'd put your head in my lap
Then make yourself comfortable, and take a nap
One way or another, you would brighten my day
Like only you could, you had a special way
You gave me a lifetime of memories to hold
Through all the years ahead, till I am gray and old
I promise I'll see you, again one day
When we'll be together again, to go run and play
Your loss is a cross I will just have to bear
Because you and I know, we were an inseparable pair
My first Halloween in 13 years without you, my precious. It just wasn't the same, Lee. Sibbie was good, restless at first, but settled down after a while. You and I would sit there for hours, until it slowed down. You just enjoyed sitting with me and watching.
It was hard and I started to cry and then Sibbie turned around and started kissing me and I knew you were with us. Josh and Alex came and she got all excited, the way you used to. We went in after a couple of hours...I tried, but it was too sad for me. I wanted Sibbie to continue our tradition and we did okay. Maybe it will be better next year, we'll see.
But this is the beginning of all our holidays, Lena, and each one will be hard to deal with and accept that you are gone. I'll decorate, cook and smile, but my heart will hurt and I will be thinking of you the whole time and wishing that you were still here with us, and not just in our memories. You will always be in my heart, Lena...always and forever.
sending you love and support. When you have loved such an angel it is hard.
Love Sonja and Apollo
Thank you, Sonja. It is, isn't it...and so hard to talk about with anyone, except here where it is perfectly natural to continue to grieve...no end date, no "you should be over it by now".
My sister cried for a year when the old dog that she inherited from a friend of mine who she used to dog sit for, died. She only had her for a couple of years, but was having such a hard time accepting her death...even she doesn't want to hear me and I get that look. I may have to remind her of that year that I listened and cried with her every time she needed to.
I am so glad I found this forum, my safe haven, where I can talk about Lee and listen to all of you talk about your babies and know that what I'm feeling is okay.
Halloween was definitely weirder this year without molly. I can relate to that.
In fact, other than taking our grandson out and meeting up with a few neighbors, I wasn't at all interested in the whole trick or treat thing this year.
We attended parties and had fun, did the office party thing, but when the door bell rang or was knocked on and there was no molly to raise hell, I didn't even want to go over. My husband and daughter basically opened the door all night and I avoided the area.
Our lives are changing without molly and I don't know if that is a good thing or a bad thing. Probably a bit of both.
I do sympathize Joan. it just sucks in a very basic sort of way.
I know, Sharlene...it must be so hard for you not having other four-legged creatures around to distract once in a while. I don't know how I could cope with complete silence, even though Lee hardly ever barked (unless she wanted something).
Maybe its a good thing that your family has moved in with you at this time...grandkids are a great distraction! When I'm busy with my two, I can't dwell and have to pay attention, but she is never completely out of my thoughts...everything is before and after Lena.
I'm dreading Thanksgiving....
It is good that the family is here. Never a dull moment. More likely is, are there any quiet moments. :)
Cats carrying on, baby everything, multiple dinners, cooking, clean ups always on going it seems. Just in general, family chaos, as is normal. It does leave me looking to find some quiet spot to hide out and have some me time, but those aren't actually very abundant in this house.
I was asked again today if we are getting another dog soon. I was like not right now, maybe later. Just too much of everything here right now for me to even think about it, although I do check the rescues often. ;)
Happy Thanksgiving in Heaven, my precious. You were missed today, Lee...so much. Gable guarded the turkey cooking in the oven for you...he also stuck close to me, watching. I made it through the day without crying. I did cry myself to sleep last night and woke up with a terrible headache and swollen eyes, but your father never noticed and by the time everyone got here, no one could tell.
Matthew missed you and even though he thinks Sibbie is adorable, he did say that there would never be another you; that you were one of a kind; and that he missed his "little friend". That made me so sad because you always let him hold you and you were always so comfortable in his arms...I know he misses you.
You were right here though...in the big room with us. I kept busy and knew I would write to you after everyone left. My first Thanksgiving in 15 years without you. If you were still here, we would be on the couch together in a turkey coma...you would wait for me to finish cleaning up and then we would cuddle up and watch TV or read. I am on the couch now, with the TV on and missing you, Lena.
You always made me happy; everything was okay as long as you were with me. It's different now. I still do what I have to do, but my heart is just not in it. I'm tired all the time from crying or trying not to cry.
I looked at last year's pictures and after dinner you were sleeping in the bed in the hallway, not joining us at the table. Even in the picture of you and Matt I can see now that you looked different. You weren't feeling well and staying by yourself a lot. One more thing that went unnoticed.
I love you with all my heart, Lee...and I always will, my precious little angel child. Love, Mommy...
Beautiful memories, Joan. I hope they provide you some comfort.
Hugs.
Thank you, Shana...I hope the same for you.
(((((Hugs)))))