Zoe By My Side- Our Journey with Cushings

I am so sorry you have lost your precious girl. I am praying God gives you comfort and strength for the days ahead.

Hi Addy

I hope today is a better today for you, I am flying to Auckland tomorrow after work with my BFF for a weekend of fun! We are staying with friends up there and going to the Bruce Springsteen concert Sunday night and fly home on Monday. When he sings "Born in the USA" I am going to be thinking of you and all my friends over there and their gorgeous pups (for all the rest of you I will think of you when I'm on Fire comes on, which is my fave!!! ) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xzQvGz6_fvA
So you get a HAPPY WEEKEND post a day early as may not be here tomorrow, so you take it easy and I will see you when I get back. **BIG HUGS** xxx

Oh have a wonderful time Trish, what fun.

The shock wore off and a deep sadness is setting in. I wish so dearly I could stay home from work but that is a catch twenty-two because it is so hard to keep up with my work even when I miss just a half day plus I just received a new project yesterday that I have no idea when I will find the time to do.

It is well below zero again and there is no let up in the forecast. It is almost March and I can never remember this much cold for so very long. You cant be outside for more than five minutes.

Im allergic to Zoe's beautiful flowers. :o :(

The world is so empty right now. I am just going through the motions. I play with Koko but my heart is so empty. I remmeber my beautiful, fiesty girl and I am happy then. I so dearly want her to come to my in my dreams but she has not.

Instead of waking up sobbing, I just wake up sad and empty. If only the cold would go away.

Hey Addy

Sorry I wasn't here when you were on and that you feel so sad today. It's so hard to know how to function and what to do with yourself at any given minute.

Work can be a good distraction but it's hard to face everyone each day I am sure, would it be possible to do some from home so that you can keep up but do it in your surroundings with Koko for company?

Rubbish you are allergic to her flowers

Nicer weather would sure do your shoulder some good too, I heard on the news that polar vortex is back, last thing you need.

Sending you the tightest hug.

Mel
Xxxxx

"The Rose"
By Amanda McBroom
As sung by Bette Midler in tribute to Janis Joplin


Some say love, it is a river
That drowns the tender reed
Some say love, it is a razor
That leaves your soul to bleed
Some say love, it is a hunger
An endless aching need
I say love, it is a flower
And you its only seed

It's the heart afraid of breaking
That never learns to dance
It's the dream afraid of waking
That never takes the chance
It's the one who won't be taken
Who cannot seem to give
And the soul afraid of dyin'
That never learns to live

When the night has been too lonely
And the road has been too long
And you think that love is only
For the lucky and the strong
Just remember in the winter
Far beneath the bitter snows
Lies the seed that with the sun's love
In the spring becomes the rose

Sending you much love and many warm hugs, Addy.

Dear Addy,

I don't know whether this will make you cry or put a smile on your face and I can only hope for the latter. I have this scene being kept played in my mind over and over whenever I think about you and sweet Zoe since the day you took her to the ER and although this brings tears to my eyes each time without a fail but still I'm glad this happened on that day. The scene is Zoe kept coming to the kitchen and you had to take her back to her blanket FIVE times that morning before you left for work. I think that was her gift to you and herself so you two could hold and feel each other as close as you possibly can five more times instead of one time for the last time. I'm so sorry about what had transpired after that but how sweet of Zoe was that to give you those last few most precious moments to you which undoubtedly will last forever in your heart and memory so you can cherish those sweet and loving moments everyday.
Zoe was not only so smart to have picked you as her forever mom but she was also so smart to leave you with this loving special gift. I love her for that and miss her so much for you.

Dear Addy
Sending you support,love. The emptiness is the pain in your heart and soul for the lose of Zoe. We realize once they are gone what a large part of our life they were and still are. You can not breathe,you feel life has been sucked out of you. You go through the motions with your body, but you are not there. You will grieve in your own way. There is no right way. We understand and are here for you as you have been there for so many others.
Hugs Sonja and Angel Apollo

It gets better Addy. It really does! It takes time. Lots of it. I don't think the pain ever goes completely away, but it does get better.
Xxxxxxx

Addy,
I'm sure there are no words to stem that deep sadness you feel. That bond with a dog is so strong. It takes time to ease the sorrow. Hope that work does give you a distraction but you probably do need some time to rest, good thing the weekend is in sight.
Thinking of you...
Barbara

Hi Sweetie,
Doesn't your hand hurt by now with me squeezing it? I'm trying to be gentle but I want to be sure you know I am right here. Is there a dent on your shoulder from where I sit? Perhaps you've noticed you're walking a little lopsided? Once your other shoulder is better, we can even that out.:)

The pain you are feeling does go on for a long, long time. There is no wrong way to grieve. Your way is the right way for you. If you are feeling it, it is what is happening. You need to walk through that in order to process it. I know you know that. Koko can help you through this. Animals have a special connection, I think.

Tomorrow is the last day of February. Didn't you say you hate February? :p Well, it will finally be over. March will be here and it will be followed by April. April brings flowers and no more Polar Vortexes.:D After you finish work tomorrow, it is the weekend. You will have two days where you won't have to talk to anyone you don't want to. You won't have to go to any meetings or work on any new projects. Maybe you and hubby can rent some silly comedy, sit around with a bowl of popcorn or some s'mores and Koko and a big throw, perhaps a fire in the fireplace, and just laugh and relax.
Whatever you feel like doing is what you're meant to do. That may just be sitting with some music on. We will be here if you need someone else to talk to.

Love,
Sus