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Dawn is breaking here on the east coast. Soon it will be light there on the prairie, too. Thinking of you, Tina, and of Jasper and Shelby. Hoping you may be getting some rest. But either way, asleep or awake, we're right here beside you.
Sending a million hugs across the miles.
Thinking of you Tina.
Hugs to you and Shelby.
Dear Tina,
Being prepared is just not possible I've decided. We just can't truly understand the agony of loss til it is here...then all our preparation flies out the window like so much confetti. Especially when the bond shared is one so special. You gave Jasper every thing possible to make his life the very best it could be every single day. He knows this, he knows how very much you love him and returns that love over and over again.
He was such a trooper, he fought every fight before him with you by his side. When no more could be done, you gave him his health and youth back again. Today he is free of all the tests, meds, vet visits, and other stressors; he is running wild and free in the Rainbow Fields with so many of our babies. He was met not only by all those who knew and loved him in this life, but by a whole host of cush pups who are teaching him the ropes. One day, Tina, when our jobs here on Earth are done we will be with our babies again and when that happens nothing will ever come between us again. I firmly believe this. Til then, our every tear honors them and the love we share.
Our deepest sympathies,
Leslie, Trinket, Sophie, Fox and all our Angels
Rainbow Bridge
Author unknown
There is a bridge connecting Heaven and Earth.
It is called the Rainbow Bridge because of its many colors.
Just this side of the Rainbow there is a land of meadows,
hills and valleys with lush green grass.
When a beloved pet dies, the pet goes to this place.
There is always food and water and warm spring weather.
The old and frail animals are young again. Those who are maimed
are made whole again. They play all day with each other.
There is only one thing missing. They are not with their special
person who loved them on Earth. So, each day they run and play
until the day comes when one suddenly stops playing and looks up!
The nose twitches! The ears are up!
The eyes are staring! And this one suddenly runs from the group!
You have been seen, and when you and your special friend meet,
you take him or her in your arms and embrace.
Your face is kissed again and again and again, and you look
once more into the eyes of your trusting pet.
Then you cross the Bridge together
never again to be separated.
Good morning Tina,
I do hope you were able to get a bit of rest. If not, it'll come. Have you eaten anything? Maybe just a bite or two, if you're able. How is Shelby doing this morning? I think our pups already know what's coming and accept it much better than we do.
It's back to work tomorrow after a week off. You would think that I would be smart and divvy up my chores to do a few a day. Unfortunately, I wasn't that smart, so today I have tons of them to do. I just strained my back flipping a mattress. I'm getting too old to do that stuff anymore, but I hate to admit it. Things have to get done, as you very well know. I don't have any big, strong, strapping people, to flip the mattress is for me. :o
I'll be checking in here often throughout the day. Staying right by your side.;) Please leave a short message if you feel up to it. If not that's OK too. Either way, I'll be back. xxxxxooooo
I'm back.:). Just wanted to let you know!!! xxxooo
Thank you so much everyone. As expected, the first night without him and first morning waking up without him has been absolutely horrid. I was able to get just a couple hours of sleep in between crying. As tired as I am, I woke up on my own at our usual middle of the night pit stop time, but there was nobody who needed to go out. Nobody in his spot on the bed. I slept with his collar. I feel like that is all I have left right now, and I'm carrying it in my pocket. :(
His absence in the house is overwhelming, and I don't feel comfortable in my own house. I went outside for a while and his absence in his back yard is overwhelming also, so I went out front and sat there for most of the morning. He didn't really spend much time in the front yard so that was better. The cold actually felt kind of good. Then it started raining so I ended up in the garage. He didn't spend any time there so I'm not as keenly aware of his absence there. I am lost without my boy. I know that each of you have been where I am and completely understand all this.
I have no idea how I am going to be able to manage my job tomorrow, or even get myself there. I just feel like crawling into a hole or something. I'm in the horrible position of being in a new job where I can't miss any time. :mad: I don't want to have to talk to any of those people, about anything. They don't know me, and they don't deserve to know anything about my boy. I so wish I could just stay home with Shelby tomorrow but I can't. She seems to be doing ok. She has done a bit of looking for him, but not much so far. Just on my heels every minute. Poor darling probably wonders if I'm going to take her somewhere and not bring her back.
I have candles burning for him in the house, and I appreciate the candles on the site. I had lit one there for him yesterday, it is comforting somehow. I hope and pray with all my being that my Angel Dakota and Peg and all your other babies have grabbed him and are there to show him the ropes. He never liked to be alone. I can't bear the thought of him being in a strange place without me and wondering why I have left him. I cannot stop crying.
Love you all, and I truly don't know what I would do without your support and kind words. xoxo
There's no need to worry about Jasper ever being alone again. He is surrounded by all of our beloved babies. Buddy probably already has him smiling and chasing rainbow lizards in the fields. ;) No more meds, or pain, just tons of healthy pups to romp and snuggle with.
I get wanting to keep others, who don't know Jasper from knowing anything. I went back to work after losing Buddy in the Summer. I already had Rosie, but I kept Buddy's journey to myself. He was mine, all mine, and I didn't want to go there, when others didn't know him. Yes, they knew me, but that didn't seem to make any difference.
You will somehow push through and get through your work day tomorrow and days to come. You won't be alone. We will will be right there with you with all the strength and support you need.
I am glad to hear that Shelby seems to doing okay.
I'll check back in a little while. xxxxoooo
Checking in on you Tina as you did so many times for me and Molly and after she passed. There are a lot of bright stars in the sky tonight with all our angels up there. So many, too many. I looked up and talked to Molly for a bit. Told her to look out for your Jasper and play with him. Tell him he is missed and loved.
All our babies that we miss so much. I'm sure they will have found each other. In my head it is always a perfect day with lots of wonderful smells to explore and they get together and tell stories of their people. Look down on us and feel sad that we hurt and miss them so much because they miss us too.
Hugs
Oh Tina, for me upon losing Barkis and Peg, I do believe awakening the first morning after was absolutely the hardest moment of all. I can only imagine how hard today has been, and also how much you are dreading tomorrow. Tomorrow, my hope for you is simply that you will find the morning bearable if for no reason other than that you will be forced to focus on your work :o. Also, as much as you would wish it otherwise, for the first time you will not need to worry about leaving Jasper behind and alone. I know you would trade anything to have him back, but for his own sake, you will know that he will not be in trouble or in pain while at home alone. He is now released from all trouble and pain, forever.
I know this cannot change your own pain, though. I remain so very sorry for your loss, and I will continue to hold you in my thoughts and heart.
Back this evening to hang with the others by your side. So wish I could bring them all back, healthy and strong forever. xxxooo
I'm signing off for tonight, but will keep checking in on you. I know you will get through work tomorrow just fine. Fake it. We all do at times.;) Work can get zooey really fast. I won't have much of a chance to post, but know that I am still with you and reading along. I hope you and Shelby are able to get some rest tonight. xxxooo
I'm here, too. My computer at home has many pictures of my Visuddha as a screensaver, and when I saw him today I told him to keep an eye out for Jasper. I'm sure they're all romping in the meadows and having a great time, while they wait for us to join them, and we sit here holding each other and missing them so. I remember my first day back at work and it was a lot easier to get through the day than I had expected, as I had something else to focus on. I hope it is for you, too.
Thinking of you Tina.
Off to work. You're probably already there. Thinking of you.
Checking in on a quick break.;) I hope your day is going smoothly.
Hi Tina, I just got in from work and have been thinking of you all day. I hope work is going well and you're hanging in there. xxxxoooo
Oh Tina, I am so, so sorry. Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.
With my deepest sympathy, Lori
Sending you some great big hugs.
Hi Tina, I just went out to light a candle for my boy and saw yours for Jasper. Oh how I wish I could see you in person and give you a great big hug. Please be gentle with yourself right now, and know that we're surrounding you with love from across the miles.
Shana
I know how hard this is. Thinking of you sweetie. I hope Shelby is stepping up and helping out. xxxooo
Many empathetic hugs, sweet Tina. This time will pass and leave behind scars but you will smile again. Your precious boy is keeping watch over you now just as you did him. Know he is with you.
Hugs,
Leslie and the gang
Thinking of you. xxxxoooo
Tina!!! Guess whose back? Just like an old penny. ;) xxxxoooo
Thinking of you! You almost slipped to page 2!!! :eek:
OMG!!!! On page 2!!! :eek::eek:
Thinking of you my dear.
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...... .
Never enough hugs. So wish I could deliver them in person.
Always,
Kathy
Sending you best wishes and hugs.
Dearest Friends,
Thank you all so much for all your beautiful words and ongoing support. I have been reading your messages but just haven't been able to bring myself to post. Each time I start to write the words, it just reinforces that my precious boy is gone.
I am really struggling and am not in a good place right now. There will be no Christmas in my house this year, I have found that I just can't manage any of it without my boy. Since I don't have any immediate family in town, it is not difficult to avoid everything. I couldn't bear putting up the tree or any decorations, and haven't been able to do any of the other things that I normally enjoy about the holiday season. There is just no joy in anything.
Unfortunately I have also been sick with upper respiratory crud for the past week, and that sure hasn't helped anything. I thought things were getting better by Thurs but seemed worse again the past couple of days. I felt so crummy I ended up going to urgent care last night (super awesome place to spend Christmas Eve evening), got an antibiotic and the Dr felt I needed a Medrol dose pak too, said my lungs are inflamed. It seems like I never get just a regular cold anymore, it always turns into something worse. Hopefully I'll be feeling better over the next couple of days.
As I sit here in the wee hours of Christmas morning, and as I do every night, I am straining my ears to hear the sound of Jasper's deep heavy breathing while he peacefully sleeps. All I hear is the ticking of my mantle clock and the sound of a random car going up the street. Somehow, I thought that maybe in the quiet of this particular early morning, I might be able to hear him. It has been 4 weeks since he left. I miss him beyond words.
I want to wish each one of you a Blessed and peaceful Christmas. And from the bottom of my heart, thank you dear friends for keeping me and my boy in your thoughts. I can't tell you how grateful I am for this family. Many hugs and much love to you all. xo
Tina
Loving hugs from me too.
I'm so grateful to hear from you, Tina. Sending my warmest thoughts and healing hugs to you. We love you, and we will always remain here, right by your side.
Sending you big hugs Tina. I too am glad that you too tina but not happy to hear how terribly sick you have been. I hope you feel better from this respiratory thing soon.
Hi Sweetie,
Thank you for posting. I was hoping that you were still reading and felt connected to us, so I kept on posting, waiting for you.
I am ao sorry to hear that you have been ill. Hopefully the meds will kick in soon and you'll start to feel better.
I totally understand your depression and lack of holiday spirit. I have been there. Holidays are hard for me, for family reasons. I go through the motions because my folks (Mom particulary) still enjoy them. They are up in age, so I'm not sure how many more years we will have together, so I keep doing it, for them.
We do what we can Tina. Sometimes just facing another day is enough to handle. I can only imagine how much you miss our precious Jasper. I still miss Buddy so much and it's been 3 1/2 years. Give yourself time to grieve. Know that we will be with you every step of the way. Hugs to Shelby. xxxxoooo
Kathy
A month ago today my beloved boy left me. My vet sent a lovely card, and wrote some very heartfelt words. The poem in the card is one of the most beautiful I have read, and even though it makes me cry, I have read it multiple times a day since it was received. If I can get through it, I thought I would share it here on our thread tonight.
We who choose to surround ourselves with lives
even more temporary than our own
live within a fragile circle, easily and often breached.
Unable to accept its awful gaps,
we still would live no other way.
We cherish memory as the only certain immortality,
never fully understanding the necessary plan...
"The Once Again Prince"
SEPARATE LIFETIMES by IRVING TOWNSEND
All of Jasper's life, my family and friends have called him our little Prince. How magical yet heartbreaking that this poem happened to be in the card I received.
There are no words to convey how much I miss him. The pain of his absence is excruciating. He is forever my Prince.
xo
That is lovely...
A truly beautiful poem. Thank you for sharing Tina. xxxooo
It is lovely indeed Tina and you are right, the pain of their absence is excruciating.
Bumping up..... Miss you Tina and understand oh so well. :o xxxooo
Hi Tina, I keep coming back to check on you! Just try to keep me away. xxxxoooo
The first birthday without you here Bubba, and it most certainly has been a tough one. I have been absolutely lost today without you, and hope you are having a grand time with all your new friends at the bridge. Thinking about so many wonderful memories of past celebrations and how I would take the day off of work and bake you a special cake and treats. We would play, watch movies or read a book all day, and snuggle. You loved it so. And also remembering how awful you felt last year and how we had a birthday do over a couple of weeks later. No words can express how much you are missed every day, but especially today on your 13th birthday.
Happy Birthday my precious baby boy with the perfect set of wings. I hope you are running like the wind and kicking up stardust. Your birthday candles are blazing on the candle page, hope you can see them. I love and miss you to the stars and beyond. Ever on my beautiful sweet Angel, ever on. Birthday smooches and nose bumps from Mama. xxoo
Happy Birthday Sweet Jasper Boy!!!
((((((((((Hugs))))))))))
Kathy