Mira, 7yr old Husky - Cushings ruled out; liver cancer (Mira has passed)

Not the best camera work... But below is a link to a Neeka video I put together. "Karamads Auntie M's NEEKA" will be her registered name, in honor of her Auntie Mira as is this video.
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Janis
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kvreKHh32KU

Oh Janis, Neeka is such a cutie pie! I feel certain that Mira's spirit still fills your home and yard, and is guiding your new baby girl every step of the way...

Marianne

I hope someday I'll be able to think of good memories of her. I loved her to pieces and she me but she was a difficult dog too. I gave in too easy. It's like she just dropped off the end of the earth. Running happily, looking back smiling at me and just suddenly fell off. Poof! Gone! She shouldn't have run away from me.

Neeka is awfully cute! What a pretty girl!!:D

Neeka hugs Kira while Kira asks God...
http://www.k9cushings.com/forum/pict...pictureid=2278

[QUOTE=Altira;47157]I hope someday I'll be able to think of good memories of her.

It will happen. It took awhile but now we can talk about the good, sweet, funny things about Maggie and smile (and sometimes cry).

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Altira

Neeka hugs Kira while Kira asks God...
http://www.k9cushings.com/forum/pict...pictureid=2278

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such a sweet picture :o

Sad day today. Miras been gone two months. I also learned that Miras breeder lost her 16 year old Marci a few days ago. Well 16 years, 4 months and 14 days she tells me. You can always tell howmuch a person cares when they come up with these figures. If I had to picture Mira at 16 I think she would have looked exactly like Marci at that age. We met Marci when we got Neeka. In fact we have a picture of me petting her. You could tell she didn't have long and she looked so much like Mira. I guess I really can't say I never saw Mira old cus I think I did. The breeder said
"Mother to none, auntie to all.* She raised my puppies with discipline and love. It hurts bad." I cry for Sherri and Marci today too.

I am so very sorry for the loss of your precious Mira. All of your babies are beautiful. I know they can't replace her, but I hope they help you overcome your sorrow one baby step at a time.

God bless,
Heidi and the bichons

Thank you. Kira and Mira had an exceptional relationship. And i collected many pictures of the two of them together. I'm putting together a still picture video called "Once There Was A Kira And A Mira." hopefully I can get it on YouTube for awhile.

It's hard not to count the days and months, isn't it? I'm still in that stage as well, even tho' my new little one keeps me occupied. :o

I like to look at photos of Mandy w/her doggy pals...I've got some cute ones and they do remind me of nicer times. I wish she had a chance to meet little Pebbles; I had been thinking about making the addition to the family many months before Mandy's passing, but held off.

But, who knows? I think if I made the choice earlier, it would not have been little Pebbles :)



Jeff & Angel Mandy & Puppy Pebbles

I just can't get it out of my head. Mira happily doing her wild patty cake thing, tearing into the house ninty miles an hour or outside diligently possuim hunting. Then the next day she can't hardly walk. A week later I learn that she's dying! Where the hell did that come from? How can a dog with that much energy and life now be dying? I can't get out of my head that image of her. I would say to her life is good huh?? And she'd happily dash off into the other room. She had become such a sweet heart. Finally after six years the separation anxiety had gone away. Everything seemed wonderful at long last. Then "cushing's"? WTF? I can't get that out of my head. The whole thing seems unreal. Her walking.. I remember coming back from walking her and saying to Bud... How can she get this bad so fast? It had been only a few days. We were out running the week before. How could she have hid it so well? Why did obvious indications be so misunderstood or explained away. Like I said my husband thought I was nuts to take her to the vet. I wondered that myself. Was I being over protective or was this weird feeling real? We both thoroughly expecting it was nothing. Oh hell, Bud is sitting here playing with Neeka. She tried to bite him but ended up falling over his feet instead. Oh he is teaching her all the wrong stuff but he loves her. Oh well.

Hello Meary Moo. Wish you were here.

Once there was "Kira and Mira"
Video- Please watch....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ziGt6b-skNg

OMG, Janis, what incredibly, amazing pictures. I am in tears, myself, here. What a wonderful way to honor Mira. Thank you so much for sharing part of her life with us. We are so much the better for it and will never forget your beautiful girl's face.
But she is not gone from you, her love and beauty lives in you and has allowed you to make room in your heart for another precious soul. Mira would be so proud of her mom.
You have come a long way. It's not easy. But Mira is with all her new friends playing in a body that is healthy and whole. She is running free and will watch over you until, one day, you see her again.
We live in the California desert and the night sky here is so clear. I can see the twinkling stars of all our angel babies bursting with light and happiness against the dark sky. I say goodnight to all of them, every night, and I believe with my whole heart they are watching over all of us.
Try to find some peace in knowing that you shared a moment in time that some people never get to experience. Short as that time was, it was an incredible gift. You loved her, she loved you. That bond can never be broken. You were an amazing mom.
Love & many warm hugs

You know... I'm home almost 24/7. I know this house well and all the sounds it makes. Maybe six times now I've heard sounds that make no sence at all. Just today in the top corner of the room I was in a cracking sound. Not so uncommon but it was the sound that followed that I can't even find words for. Kira walked in the room a second later. She's only been in that room like four times since Mira passed. Kira did you hear that? She excepted the hug and a pat on the head and quit the room again. In the kitchen five days ago. Another sound. I don't go look. I don't want to look for her. Cus she won't be there. Looking for her will just make things worse. Ho geez.. Neeka just threw up for the first time ever. I don't think I want to talk about this anymore. Neeka is telling me she's fine. Mira, she's gone. But i cant help but wonder.

Today I needed to go get meds for Kira. So I loaded up the dogs. Neeka is in training for travel. We are heading for ACC.*And I'm**crying thinking about Mira. When we got there I told Neeka this is where your Auntie Mira died. I was in there for about fifteen minutes. Looking at all these faces that I remember so well. They have five receptionists.**I saw dr Diehl.*I wondered if any of them remembered me. It's been two months. Three since mira died. It's a busy place. Nobody said anything. I thought about bringing Neeka in to met them but I didn't. My Mira... Damn

Happy Birthday Mira! Where ever you are!

I have a little green digital clock on the table beside me. It flashes back and forth between the time and the date. I looked at it a few moments ago and see that suddenly parts of the digital numbers are missing. The battery must be low. How odd that would happen at this moment. But I already know it's February 27th.

Happy Birthday Mira.

I'm so tired.

What a beautiful tribute to a beautiful friend.Mira.
I cried through the whole video.
hugs Sonja and Apollo

Being fairly new to this site, I just saw the beautiful pictures you posted. I too am grieving a very new loss of my Princess Leia. She had Cushings, but I also suspect liver disease. I know what you mean about hearing the noises. I look for her in faces of others, and feel she is close by. I believe your Mira is also close by, so thankful of the time you had together. We can only hold onto the wonderful memories we had with our furry friends. I fell so blessed to have had the time I did, as I am sure you are too. I think that one day we will all be reunited with all of those we have cared for throughout our lives. My thoughts are with you as we travel through our grief.

That is so sweet thank you!

I haven't forgotten you Mira. But you know that. I keep remembering the moment I let you go. The last time I touched you. And the moment after that, that I can't say yet. Everytime I think of you it's that movement. You weren't ready to go. You didn't know it was the end. God it hurts. I feel so bad.

Remember I told you my little green clock on the table beside me had suddenly quit working right after midnight. It was the first moment of what should have been Mira's 8th birthday. And I wondered. Surly it's just a low battery. But then the next morning it was working again. It was still Mira's birthday. And it could still be a low battery. But I wondered. I told Bud about it to. He seemed to wonder a bit too. But then he said it must be a low battery. Odd though cus it continued to work for a long time. Weeks. Finally about a week and a half ago it quit. It was sad cus i had hoped it wasnt low batteries but i wasnt surprized when it quit again. I sadly told Bud. *

A few days later i bought a new battery. And much to my dismay it still didnt work right. Its a digital clock and parts of the numbers didnt light up. I had grown very dependent on this clock to let me know what day it was. *I only ever used it for the date. I messed with it for three days! Trying to get it to work. I *cleaned it and fiddled with it. It was no use. It was broken. Now I'm thinking my so important little clock had started to die on Mira's birthday. Started to die just like my little Mira. That sure made me sad.

I needed this clock so I began looking for a replacement on the Internet. I looked for three days. There was nothing like my little green clock. I tried *again to get it to work. I tried different batteries and fiddled with it again. I've had it for years and it still looks new! But still only parts of the numbers would light up. I just couldn't seem to give up on it. My little green clock started to die on my Mira's 8th birthday.

I looked at her picture beside me and I said. Why did it start to go bad when it did? Was that you Mira? Well if it was and you made it do that when it did, then show me. Make it start working again on Kira's birthday. I put the fresh battery back in it and kissed it and set it up on a shelf to wait until Kira's birthday on March 27th. There's no way it was going to start working again.

That was about three days ago. A little while ago I looked up on that shelf where I had set it aside. The numbers appear to be working. I'm afraid to touch it. This clock is clear, it could be diseving. I picked it up. The numbers are working. But it's not set. Maybe it's just a flook. Maybe the minute I touch the buttons it will just mess up again. But I had to try it. It worked. It worked perfectly. No evidence of a short or faulty buttons.

Now I sit here and look at it flashing the date at me and Mira's picture so near to it. I speak to her picture and think maybe she does hear me, maybe she does know what I'm feeling. And maybe the little green clock will quit again tomorrow.

I know it didn't start working again on Kira's birthday. But when does god ever allow for clear signs from the here after. We can't prove it exists for just this reason. So it not being the exact timing I asked for to me seems almost irrelevant. Or wishful thinking.. Time will tell (ha ha). Will my clock fail again or will it carry on for years to come?

It's funny mom... When I asked Mira to fix my clock I thought about tell you. So I would have a witness that I really had asked for this. But of course I didn't. For lots of reasons. One being that god doesn't allow clear answers. If I told you it might not be allowed to happen. And you know even if it does quit again this is still something, maybe it will happen because I told you about it now. I once asked for a sign with all my heart for months and months after Sigh died. And this horrible black cloud hung over me the whole time. I promised myself not to ever do that again. It was a horrible place to be and I never saw the slightest sign from Sigh. I did have that very odd dream but as hard as I was trying to link to him I just figured the power of my mind created it. So with Mira I was not looking but I had started singing happy birthday to her before I noticed the clock.

Anyway. I did not ask for this, it was just given to me. I'm so sorry little Mira...

Oh, Janis,

Tears are just flowing, falling off my chin in rivers. Mira and your mom, together, reaching out to you through a little green clock - what a wonderful gift! I think they knew you needed to feel them now, not in a few days - they needed to touch you now, not later. You called in your pain and they came to ease your heart, to let you know they have never left your side, that they are always watching over you.

I believe when our time comes to cross The Bridge, we will be filled with an understanding that encompasses all. All our questions will be answered, everything we could never grasp will be clear, we will see things as they truly are, unhampered by human emotion or intellect. A pure, clean, limitless awareness.

It was this awareness that your mom and Mira have attained that told them you needed this sign now. I believe this was a healing gift from them to you - a tangible sign you can see and touch so you will know they are together, that they are ok, and that they still love you more than you can ever know on this plane.

If the lights in that little green clock go out today and never come back, that is alright - it has served it purpose. And it had a secret purpose that went far beyond what it's manufacturer ever intended - as a conduit of pure, unadulterated love sent to bath your soul in light and peace.

You have been truly blessed. Thank you for sharing this story, Janis.

Many hugs,
Leslie

Janis, I thank you for sharing, too. And like Leslie, I do believe that your little clock has served its purpose well.

I hope that Mira's spirit will always remain close to your heart, and that the reminders of your loving connection will never cease.

Sending many hugs in honor of your sweet baby Mira.
Marianne

(((hugs)))



Lynne, Bailey and Angel Clyde

Thank you. I'm so fancyful i know. It's nice to know that some poeple dont think im nuts. Its what i need to deal with the loss i guess.

The Little Green Clock... Quite a story. It has since stopped working correctly again. It worked for a while on Kiras birthday but faltered again before it was over. It did start to die on what should have been Miras 8th birthday. And maybe came back just for a whisper. I dont know my mom and i think it may have been my grandmother. She always seems to come around just before i loose a dog. Just a whispering in my head. She seems to know before i do. Maybe mira was a suprize to her too cus she didnt do that this time. No whispering this time. That could be my fault. My faith in god has slipped some in resent years. More so with the sudden loss of Mira one day shes happy running around seeming heathly as can be, then 22 days later shes gone. Mira... I can't believe she's gone.

I got her license renewal notice today. I wrote and told them she is gone.

Sweetie Mira. I can't believe this happened to you.

Janis,
I just looked at your video. It brought smiles and tears to my eyes at the same time. What a beautiful keepsake you have. Thank you for sharing it. Even when it is hard, try to keep the faith. Some days you just take baby steps.
Lots of hugs,
Heidi, Marco, Sophie, Sasha & Maggie
...and Friskie, Lucky, Cheri and Snicky from Heaven...

I'm still haunted by so many things. How can I ever forget those last 22 days. It's almost 3 am, baby Neeka isn't sleeping. She just crawled back into the pillow again for the forth time in the last hour. It set off one of those unexpected moments. I remember Mira those last days, I don't think slept at all. I didn't sleep much and she was always awake. I wonder what she was thinking. People think I'm over her. But when I'm alone I remember those last twenty two days. I think about what bud told me and picture it inmy head. Talking to the cancer doctor. I couldnt remember something so I went to the car for my notes. When I came back bud said Mira tried to follow me. Wanted to follow me. I know it happened cus I was recording our visit and I heard the doctor and him remark about it. Mira always wanted to be with me. But I sent her away. When I walk the dogs I play sad songs. I look at the sky and tell Mira I never wanted her to go. If she is out there somewhere it sure doesn't feel like it. She's just gone. There is nothing. If anyone wonders about getting another dog to soon. At least for me there is no problem with it. I still grieve for Mira. It's been six months but it feels much longer. And we love little Neeka to death. She brings us happiness.

Dear Janice,

So good to hear from you again but I am sorry the pain of losing Mira is still so close.

It does get better, however time does not heal all wounds, as the old adage goes. Some wounds will never truly heal no matter how much time passes. The smallest, seemingly insignificant things can rip it open again, bringing us to our knees in fresh waves of pain and grief. A scent, a sound, the expression on anothers' face, a blue flower that didn't bloom....something innocent in and of itself but devastating to our hearts. We find ourselves thrown back to the most awful of days over and over again, reliving it in minute detail, asking the same unanswered questions.

For me, the times those wounds are made new again come less often and I recover a bit more quickly as the days have passed. Those painful triggers don't always lay me low today, sometimes they're just a slap not a punch. Time has not and will not heal these wounds, it has simply given me the opportunity to learn how to look, how to listen, how to live as one of the Walking Wounded.

"Opportunity" sounds like an odd choice of words, I'm sure, but that is how I have come to see things. For every horrible, life-altering event I have survived there has been an opposite and balancing gift. But it was a long time before I was aware of this - a long, long time. Squirt's Cushing's diagnosis just about did me in; I truly lost my mind in fear. But as awful as that time was, that diagnosis led me here where I found not only help for her but friends, real friends. Her diagnosis broadened my little world, enriching it - balancing the anguish and fear I still have for her future. Because of her illness I have learned so much, not just about Cushing's but so many things, including myself.

It's only because you love Mira so much that you grieve so deeply. I think that in itself is a gift, Janis. So many people are unable to feel those depths, they cannot know the kind of love that leads to such a degree of suffering. It's this ability to love in such a manner that allows you to see your babies as more than animals; it's this ability that led you to Mira, Kira, and now, Neeka. It is this ability that will lead you through the valleys and into the light.

Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers always.
Hugs,
Leslie

A Dogs Message from Heaven

I am sending you this message as I can see you are still having struggles with coping each day since my passing.

You may walk in darkness and your heart is broken with my absence. I haven't left you as you hold me in your heart. Please don't be sad as the light will come shinning through for you. For each day of sunshine, think of it as reminder of me beaming down on you. Be happy that I am no longer in pain from sickness or injury. I don't want you grieving for me for long as it makes me sad to see you in so much hurt. Don't dwell on the guilt you feel for making decisions we both know you had to do and I thank you for releasing me of my sickness.

Cry if you need to miss me if you must, but don't worry about me, I'm in a place I love.

Yesterday I talked with the Creator and he said you'd come one day. I wanted you to know this. So you see I'm happy and I am free. There's nothing to worry me. Dry your eyes and make plans to see me again. I will look for you and when you get here, you will see what a wonderful place this is.

Let me tell you what it's like here in this wonderful place. There are no clouds or dreary rain…Just lot of blue sky and sunshine casted on us from His most gracious presence. There are miles of green grassy fields and meadows of beautiful flowers.

There are no cruel humans to hurt us, just the keepers who have been specially chosen to care for us...

We all get along here large and small. Some of us had a pretty rough life while others were very spoiled. We run and play tag or chase balls. We can be lazy as we want and take long naps. The Creator checks on us each day.

I have met many of your friend’s fur kids here.

It's been neat to see my brothers and sisters again that came here before me. There is never a sad moment. Just so much to keep busy....We get a lot of new kids arriving daily and is fun to show them the ropes here.

We are here waiting here for you when your purpose on Earth is complete. My wish for you is to be happy for me and not sad. It will be the most happiest of reunions and I will lick away all your tears. There will be nothing but good times for ever and ever.

I will let you feel my presence if you will just have faith and allow it to happen.

When the time is right and it will come, I want you to take in another fur kid to care for just as you cared for me and protected me from all harm and gave me the security that I needed all those years. They deserve the life I had with you. Don't think of it as replacing me but giving another the love you have inside you to bring joy to another. I felt honored to a part of your life and you gave me so much of yourself.... That will always be special.

You were my life and I will always love you for that.

I am not that far away and I will be close to you in spirit and will remain in your heart. That is the bond that connects us. Do not think of me when I was at my worst but all the great memories we shared together. I hate to see you cry. I am happy here so be glad for me.

I want to be remembered for all the silly things I did and things we did together. We had some great times together.... So cherish those memories.

So my best friend, until your task on Earth is finished, take care of yourself and help another less fortunate kid to know the love I shared with you and you will be forever rewarded. You will know when the time is right.

Love you Forever,
Your 4 legged soul-mate.

Author...Kay Faulkner

Awe Leslie, it is always nice to hear from you too! I guess in a nut shell one could say "there is good in all things". They sure can be hard to find sometimes. If not for Mira, we would not have Neeka. But I still tell God that that was not a good enough reason to take Mira that way. But never the less, we love Neeka.

I went to the dentist the other day. A root canal you know. He gave me Valium and nitrous oxide and told me bring my favorite music to lessen to. Well those songs are all the ones I was listening to before Mira got sick and after she died. Normally I'm fine with them. Tears started to fall right away and when it came to the song I used for my "Once there was Kira and Mira" video the dentist stopped cus I was shaking. I said this song is too sad. He let me change it. I'm still glad thou, I'm used to the mental pain, physical pain not so much.

I need to comment on Kiras thread soon. We have two general doctor visits this month. I'll wait until then to offer my thoughts on her.

Oh Mira... You've weighed so heavy on my mind the last several days. Your little niece Neeka is so beautiful and smart. I'm so glad to have her. And so sad you had to go the way you did.

It was a year ago the tragedy began. I've already begun many tearful days. I've lost many dogs I loved no less. But this one was just not fair. I look at that x-ray and I see what looks the insides of a very healthy dog. Clear and strong. Except for this huge white spot right beside her heart that should not be there. I remember feeling like I was going to throw up when I saw it. Poor Mira. So unfair.

Our Kira is not doing overly well. Not well at all. Like Mira there is nothing solid to pin a problem to. Like Mira, minor things are being explained away. I fed her steak tonight. If we are loosing her I want spoil her now. She was in the kitchen shaking tonight because the smoke alarm was going off. She continues to loose weight since her Cushings operation ten months ago. From 68 pound to 53 now. My sweety Kira. 11 year old Siberian Husky.

The little green clock strikes again...

For 7 months now my little green clock has worked faithfully. I had almost forgotten what it once did.

Thanksgiving is the last sort of good day I had with Mira. The day she told me I was more important then the bushes.

Today is Nov 24th, it's thanksgiving. Earily this day at a little after midnight my little green clock did it's thing again. Flashing between digital numbers that are half missing. Again I am stunned. why now? why at this very moment?

But it does not end there. For the next several days it continues with it's odd flashing of unreadable numbers. Back and forth, from the date and time.

Today is Nov 27th 2011. My Mira died one year ago on this date. On Nov 27th 2010. At a few minutes after midnight my little green clock started working perfectly again. Flashing 11 27. I can hardly breath!

This is the forth time now. It only falters on dates relivant to my Mira.
My Mira, my little green clock.


Taken on Nov 24th just after midnight:

http://www.k9cushings.com/forum/pict...pictureid=3315


Taken on Nov 27th just after midnight:

http://www.k9cushings.com/forum/pict...pictureid=3316

The angels are out there... I hope they take care of my friend Stormee (aka: Skye). I'm not sure if I'm here for her, or her for me...

Dear Janis,

I just read your reply on Skye's thread, and came rushing back here. Because I had intended to post a reply to you right at the moment that I first read again about your little green clock last week -- but then I got distracted and was tardy in returning! :o

Probably part of my delay was also because it is so hard to find words to express the wonder of events and feelings for which there are no "rational" explanations. But I was (and am) so touched by your enduring love for your Mira and by the comfort that comes from the mysterious antics of your little green clock :o.

I do believe that love never dies, and that the spirits of those we love are never far from us. I hope that the magical messages from your little clock will continue to bring you comfort, Janis, and precious memories of your pretty Mira.

Always in loving memory of your sweet girl,
Marianne

Hi Sweetie,

I've tried several times to send you an email and come here to post...but every time I end up crying too hard to write.

Your little green clock, to my mind, is tied to those you loved so deeply on this side of The Bridge. On one hand it is a time keeper in the physical plane but on the other hand it is a reminder from the other plane. A reminder to you that you are not forgotten over there, that you are still oh so very loved and missed just as much as you still love and miss them. It is a reminder that the Crossing isn't the end, it is just another beginning. It's a reminder that nothing of the good in our lives is lost in the Crossing, that all our love goes with us to be continued through all Time. It is a reminder that the pain and grief you feel at this time will one day be left behind to be replaced with everlasting joy as you Cross over. It is a reminder that you are never, ever alone on this side.

You are blessed, Janis, and in return you have blessed others through your loss and pain. I have no doubt that every time you reached out to Stormee or anyone else, Mira's tail was wagging furiously with such great pride in her Mom.

Many hugs, dear one, many hugs,
Leslie

I read Mira's thread tonight. I'm in process of crying myself to sleep and you chimed in. It still hurts so much when I think about it. And I know why you cry Leslie too. It will never go away. It was just too unfair. Thank you for your kind words. And reading about my clock. Ohhh

"I'm drowning here please, anyone. I don't think I can, save myself."
Just lyrics.

Love you Mira...

I know... I changed the picture and put Kira in your place. It was hard to do. I don't feel any less for you, I hurt for you everyday. But at least I can say you were my number one girl for awhile. I'm just so sad you never knew it. I'm so sorry Mira. I can't put Neeka behind Kira, not after what happened to you. Not when I see Neekas little face look at me so sad, just like yours always did.