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Budsters Mom
10-21-2013, 04:05 AM
My Beautiful Buddy Boy,

You brought light where there was darkness.

Joy where there was sorrow.

Companionship where there was loneliness.

Smiles where there were frowns.

You taught me how to love unconditionally by example.

You were such a large presence in such a little body.

A soul wiser than all.

Accepting of all.

Giving to all.

Loving all and expecting nothing in return.

You left me much too soon. I had many more lessons to learn and you taught them so well.

Thank you for loving me so much and for taking such great care of me every day. I am the person I am today because of you, my precious boy.

Hunt free little man. Be happy and do not worry about me. We will be reunited when the time is right. Until then, greet the newcomers with the same love and tenderness that you gave me so freely.

Love you always my Mighty lizard Hunter.
Mom

Bo's Mom
10-21-2013, 06:52 PM
How beautifully written for such a beautiful soul. I do believe that they will be there waiting for us when they know that we have been called but until then I know Buddy, Bo, and all the countless other fur angels are out and about just enjoying themselves and finding all the best places to show us when we all meet again.

frijole
10-21-2013, 07:23 PM
What a wonderful tribute from a great mom. No doubt your little hunter is looking down with a feisty smile on his face. Hugs, Kim

apollo6
10-21-2013, 08:20 PM
from the soul. A beautiful tribute to a beautiful soul.
Hugs Sonja and Angel Apollo

scoora
10-21-2013, 10:23 PM
Oh Kathy, that is beautiful.

gatorgirl_bama
10-25-2013, 01:47 PM
Kathy,
He is a beautiful boy. And we will be reunited with our little loves one day.

Love and prayers,
Donna

Budsters Mom
11-08-2013, 08:41 PM
My brother gave me a plastic exercise pen with eight panels. It has since been broken up into three pieces, due to the fact that they had a St. Bernard. One of the pieces barricades a troublesome door. The second piece barricades my bed so Rosie can't jump up on the high bed. The largest piece encloses the front porch perfectly. Rosie is now able to sit out there and watch the world.

This bring me to Buddy. He was no longer able to jump up on the cedar chest to look out the window for guard duty. I put a ramp up for him. That only worked for a while until his rear leg weakness made that impossible. He then moved to the security front doors. They were only available when the weather was such that we could have the other doors open. The rest of the time he couldn't look out at all, which I knew was very upsetting to him. He would have loved to sit out on the porch and guard his family. He didn't get that option.:o

molly muffin
11-08-2013, 09:26 PM
Buddy guarded the most important person in his life, every single day and that is you. I am sure he would have loved to have been sitting out there, although probably to check for lizards. :) Have no doubt though, he was happy to just be with you.

I think there are now and will be in the future, many such bittersweet moments. He was after all your mighty lizard hunter. We are always grateful that you found our site and that you shared Your Buddy with us. He made such an impression with his spirit, even when the disease was taking it's toll.

I always prefer to think that they watch over us still, and who knows Buddy might be sitting on that porch with Rosie, watching for lizards and anything interesting, egging her on when she is scampering a round.

hugs,
Sharlene and Molly Muffin

Budsters Mom
11-19-2013, 03:40 PM
I read a post today about a dog who follows his mom everywhere. She said that he would even follow her to his death.:o It made me cry because that is exactly what I did with Buddy. He was always completely trusting of everyone, even the vets who did nasty, painful things to him. So sad. :o:(

Mel-Tia
11-19-2013, 04:06 PM
Kathy you can't think like that. You made the decision for Buddy because of his quality of life and you put his needs above your own, please don't think like this.

You gave him the best life and you let him go before he suffered too much from it. I struggled so much to make the decision and it hurts my heart to know how far treatments have come since I lost Tia but we did the right thing by our babies with the options we had

Sending you the tightest biggest hug Kathy

Mel
Xxxxxxx

labblab
11-19-2013, 04:26 PM
The faith they place in us does feel like an awesome responsibilty, doesn't it...:o

Perhaps another way to look at it, though, is that Buddy was spared the human fear and dread of that which is to come. When they proceed so willingly, surely it must be because they are not afraid? And so we are the ones who carry that burden on their behalf. That is our sacrifice because we love them so. I don't believe Barkis was afraid that day, nor was Buddy. They trusted us to do what we thought best for them. And so we did, Kathy. So we did.

Budsters Mom
11-21-2013, 11:02 PM
If course you are both right ladies, but I still feel really sad. :o:( I took my loving and trusting little heart dog and ended his life. My head tells me that I did the right thing for Buddy, but my heart is not so sure. :o:(

lulusmom
11-22-2013, 12:40 AM
Kathy, it wasn't just your head that was telling you to set Buddy free of his pain. Your heart was probably speaking louder than your head was that day. The decisions we make for our babies are not sterile, based only on common sense. Our decisions come from our heart, which is where we hold this amazing love and compassion for our pups, and sometimes we don't even know how deep that love is until we are confronted with having to make one of the most awful decisions of our life. It's normal to second guess yourself but I know that in time, you will be able to look back on that day and know in that big heart of yours, that you made the right decision for your beloved Buddy.

Hugs,
Glynda

Trish
11-23-2013, 03:50 AM
Awww Kathy, I have just tried writing this note to you about 3 times and can't quite get it right, but this made me feel sad you felt like that. They do follow us anywhere and we are the lucky ones they have such love for us to do that. You did the right thing, regardless of what your heart or head was telling you then or even now. You had a choice and you chose to put your Buddy to rest in comfort while he waits for you to meet him at the bridge. I am so sorry I made you feel bad xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Budsters Mom
11-23-2013, 10:42 AM
You didn't make me feel bad Trish. When I read you post on Flynn's thread you were just voicing your concern and feelings at the time. Yes, they will happily follow us anywhere and everywhere, even to their own own deaths. This forum is a safe place to voice those concerns and to find people who understand. It isn't your fault that my mind went elsewhere with your comment because that is exactly what I did. I lead Buddy to his demise and he went happily. Happily to follow me anywhere just to be with me. This is not your problem Trish. It is mine. The grief if losing Buddy comes in waves. This is just another one. xxxxxx

molly muffin
11-23-2013, 12:14 PM
Kathy, I really don't think that there is anyone who has had to do what you did, who doesn't at some point or many points, end up revisiting it and wondering and feeling guilt over it.
I always said that Tasha would let me know when she was ready. In a way she did but the way she didn't is that I always said, but Tasha is still happy, she wags her tail if you even look at her, she loves people and wants to be right there in your lap, even when she could barely stand to have her skin touched, but she was happy. Still I made that decision, because her eyes said, it hurts to stand up, it hurts to lay dow. She couldn't stand to walk outside and would pee everywhere. (quite a bit for a golden) And still her tail would wag and she would crawl into my lap, all 60lbs of her. But I did make that decision. She loved to go the vets, thought it was a real joy to be there and was never scared. She went in happily to her own demise, tail wagging, and head rubs by all and I held her head and looked into her eyes until she was no longer there in her body. Sorry, that is as much as I can actually say right now as the tears stream down my face.

Kathy, there are many who have felt what you feel now and will in the future. It is normal and you are not alone. I don't want you to think of it as a problem, it is just what it is, a terrible time came in your and Buddy's life, and you had to make the decision. If not then, maybe later. Those last few weeks though, took a terrible toll on you and on Buddy and it wasn't easy. There were very good reasons that you made the decision when you did.

Super big hugs!
Sharlene

Trish
11-23-2013, 05:43 PM
Yes and more super big hugs from me too... you are such a lovely person Kathy and have been such a support to me, I am very honoured to have your friendship :) I hope these waves of emotion will go from the crashing of big rollers on the shore to a more gentle ebbing as time goes by, your Buddy is still bringing us all joy as we remember his fun ways and thinking of him always brings a smile to my face xxxxxx

Budsters Mom
11-23-2013, 06:12 PM
AWWWW Trish, we've been through much together and I am honored to call you my friend also. :p You and Flynny will always have a special place in my heart. :p

AWWW Sharlene, it took a lot to share Tasha's story with me. Thank you. You don't have to say anymore, because I know how it went. I stayed with Buddy also until he was no longer there and told him to go get the lizards. I then was left alone with him on that cold, exam table to say goodbye. Leaving him there was heartbreaking. I couldn't even go home afterwards because my folks had begged me not to take him and I couldn't face them. I sat and cried my heart out in my car for hours, then walked the mall, before eventually going home. So yes, I can imagine how your story ended.

Budsters Mom
12-14-2013, 11:19 AM
Christmas is actually going to arrive without you here.:o How is that possible? Love you and miss you tons. xxxxx

Trish
12-14-2013, 05:42 PM
And we will get through it together Kathy xxxxxxxxxx :)

Budsters Mom
12-16-2013, 08:26 PM
MERRY CHRISTMAS BUDDY BOY!! I miss you sooooo much! :o

I posted a Christmas photo of a happier Christmas, as his new Avatar for the month.

I still don't understand how this happened. You were perfectly fine for so many years except for allergies, until you weren't. Now you're gone and I can't bring you back. I feel so sad.:o:( I hope there are lizards running everywhere and you're eating all the good stuff now. There are no allergies in doggie heaven, so pig out!

Until we me again, be happy!
Mom

mcdavis
12-16-2013, 08:38 PM
It's going to be very hard to spend that first Christmas without them isn't it,

{{{{ Hugs }}}} for you too Kathy

Harley PoMMom
12-16-2013, 09:41 PM
Buddy looks so adorable in his Christmas picture...sending huge and loving hugs to you, dear Kathy.

Trish
12-17-2013, 02:22 AM
I LOVE Buddy's Christmas pic!! A star is so fitting for him, as that is what he is to all of us on this group!! Shine down on us all Buddy Boy :D xxx

ps I am going to follow your lead and put up a Christmas pic of Flynny, can't do any fancy stars though!! :D

molly muffin
12-17-2013, 05:06 PM
HUGS Kathy

A perfect christmas pictures of the mighty lizard hunter.

hugs,
Sharlene and molly muffin

scoora
12-19-2013, 01:09 AM
Love Buddy's picture.
The holidays are tough without them.
Hugs

Budsters Mom
12-24-2013, 11:46 AM
Hey Smiley,
It's Christmas Eve and I've already has a good cry this morning. I have been pretty sick for a while now. You are usually right by my side until I start to feel better. It's weird that your not.

I know that you could care less about dressing up in all the silly Christmas outfits, but you did it because it made me happy. You always wanted me to be happy. My sweet little shadow who loved his family more than life itself.

The Christmas Eve party has been moved to Uncle Dave's house. They don't want my yuck and I don't blame them. Papa and Gramma are going to the party. I am going to stay home with Rosie. That's okay. I'm not feeling up to it anyway.

We'll, I hope you have something fun planned with your best buds up there. At least you won't have to dress up this year! It doesn't seem right celebrating Christmas without my wee little man to join in the festivities.

Love and miss you bunches,

Mom

Trish
12-25-2013, 02:57 AM
Hi Kathy

I am sad you are missing out on the festivities tonight, but kinda pleased you are not having to drag yourself around cleaning and prepping food. Hopefully this bit of time to relax without having to worry about all that will help you feel a bit better for tomorrow. Hope you did get some rest with that little minx not tearing too much! Merry Christmas Kathy xxxxxx

Budsters Mom
12-25-2013, 11:55 AM
Trish,

THANK YOU SO MUCH for lighting two candles for my mighty lizard hunter. :p

I'm beginning to wonder if I might have whooping cough?:eek::eek: We had a few cases going around school before break. My cough is horrendous and I can't lie down at all without coughing up a lung. My voice still hasn't returned. Or it could just be my usual bronchitis. Either way, it's exhausting. At least I'm on break right now.

I already cleaned BEFORE the party was taken elsewhere. Ug! It is just as well though. It is a little before 9:00 on Christmas morning. I will be staying home with Rosie once again, while my folks go to Christmas dinner at my brother's house. My neighbors came over last night and brought toys for Rosie, with a card adressed to Rosie and Family. It was cute. I got her some toys too, for her first Christmas. It is so sad that she is deprived in that department. LOL:D The basket is overflowing as it is! Anyway, I will rotate toys to keep the little monkey busy, so I should be able to get some rest today.

May all you heavenly angels have a joyous and Healthy holiday! Xxxxx

Trish
12-25-2013, 03:52 PM
So pleased your brother has stepped up to the plate Kathy, not so pleased you are whooping!! Have you seen the Dr yet? This cannot go on like this, your poor thing you must be exhausted!!

Yep Buddy got two candles, so did Woody before I realised I was signing in the wrong place DOH!! Remembering all our fur angels today alongside you all.

xx

molly muffin
12-25-2013, 05:10 PM
I know this holiday is hard and sad on many levels, Buddy missing, you being sick. I'm very grateful that you have Rosie in your life now and that your brother did indeed step up.
Things will get better. I just know it.
hugs,
sharlene and molly muffin

Budsters Mom
12-26-2013, 08:05 PM
Sharlene and Trish,

I finally got in to see the doctor today. I have bronchitis and whooping cough! :eek::eek::eek: I was also running a fever that I was not aware of. I am on 10 days of heavy-duty antibiotics and medication to help ease the coughing, so hopefully I can sleep. We'll see. I will write more tomorrow. I am exhausted! Thanks for asking guys. Xxxxx

molly muffin
12-26-2013, 08:17 PM
Kathy I am so glad that you got in to a see a doctor and got some good meds to try and kick this thing. No more messing around with your health now! Get some rest, drink plenty of fluids to stay hydrated and then ..more rest!! Take care. I'm so glad you got a diagnosis.

hugs,
sharlene and molly muffin

labblab
12-26-2013, 08:35 PM
OMG! Kathy, were you ever vaccinated for whooping cough? I'm just checking the web now and see that it may be prudent to get whooping cough boosters -- I didn't know you didn't get lifetime immunity! I just got a shingles vaccination, but looks like a whooping booster may be in order, too...:o

Marianne

Budsters Mom
12-26-2013, 08:43 PM
Yes Marianne, I got a Pertussis booster in 2010! Little good it did me!:mad: All District staff were encouraged to get a booster following an outbreak on a college campus. Parents are opting out of vaccinations, so is occurring more often! I was almost hospitalized! Pneumonia would have set in within the next few days if antibiotics weren't started before then. The sad thing is I tried to get an appt. a week ago and they wouldn't let me come in. :o:( So, I have been very sick for close to two weeks!

Budsters Mom
12-26-2013, 08:52 PM
Marianne,
Pertussis boosters in the form DPT (Diptheria, pertussis and tetanus) have been encouraged for a few years now. District staff was not forced to get a booster, but it was STRONGLY ENCOURAGED. It was previously believed that the initial shots provided lifetime protection, but not anymore. I've never coughed like this before and have had bronchitis and pneumonia previously. I would still recommend getting a booster, even though it didn't protect me. I hope this helps.

Trish
12-26-2013, 11:36 PM
Well I am so pleased you got into the doctor Kathy, you poor thing that has been going on so long. Hopefully these meds will kick it into touch soon. When were you due to go back to school? I would imagine you would have to be clear of this for some time before they let you back. Keep resting up!! Have you got some inhalers for the bronchitis to open up the airways? Hope your feeling better soon xxx

mcdavis
12-27-2013, 05:27 PM
Sorry to hear you're so ill at the moment - take care of yourself and hope you're feeling better soon.

Budsters Mom
12-27-2013, 11:18 PM
Thank you for all the well wishes angels. I am hanging in there, resting when I can and not doing much else. I'm still feeling like crap, but at least I know why. I am hoping the antibiotics start to kick in soon, so I feel a little better. No fever today, which is good. At one time or another, I have had pneumonia, and several bouts of bronchitis. Never have I had a cough as physically exhausting as this. I cough until I can no longer breathe, then struggle for air to continue coughing. This cycle can continue for hours, until I vomit or wet myself. Neither is pleasant! It is much worse at night. I have to rest propped up, which no one can sleep like that! The good news is that I have another week off to rest and plenty of sick leave if I need it. At least I have that option. I am concerned about my folks catching it. They are in their eighties and have many other health issues.

That's about it for now. Thanks for caring. Before I forget.... You might want to check in to getting a Pertussis(Whooping Cough) booster. If you had a DPT (Diptheria, Pertussis, Tetanus) immunization as a child, you don't have lifetime immunity as previously believed. I had my booster and still got it, but hopefully I will recover faster with fewer complications. Whooping Cough is serious. There have been deaths reported. Protect yourself angels. We need all of you healthy. :p xxxxx

scoora
12-27-2013, 11:26 PM
Kathy,
Hope you get some relief soon and start to feel better.
Take care of yourself.

Budsters Mom
12-31-2013, 11:37 PM
HAPPY NEW YEAR BUDDY BOY! Party on, my mighty lizard hunter! Don't worry, there aren't any fireworks to scare you up there. Your birthday is rapidly approaching. It makes me feel sad that you're not able to be here with me. What a sucky day that will be.:o I love and miss you so much! You left much too soon. I had so many more lessons to learn and you taught them oh so well. I hope you are happy. Love you forever,

Mom

goldengirl88
01-20-2014, 06:41 PM
I miss you too Buddy. I always loved hearing about your daily adventures that your mom so lovingly shared with all of us. I would get my Buddy fix and be happy the rest of the day. God bless you Buddy you made me happy with your little antics.

Budsters Mom
01-20-2014, 07:07 PM
Thanks Patti. Yes, Buddy is one of a kind. Such a joy and zest for life that was packed into that little body of his. He knew more about unconditional love than I will ever know. An old soul was he. I still miss him every day. :o

Buddy boy - I hope you are busy catching rainbow lizards and eating anything you want. You were always happy, no matter what was going on around you. Why can't people give love as freely as you did?

Love you forever tough guy,
Mom

Budsters Mom
02-18-2014, 10:40 PM
HAPPY BIRTHDAY BUDDY BOY!!! I miss you so much! I hope you have a steak cake with rainbow lizards dancing on top! I so wish we were still together! I hope you are happy. OOOOXXXX

molly muffin
02-19-2014, 12:14 AM
Happy birthday Buddy. We miss you here too but I know you are running around chasing lizards in the doggie heaven and keeping an eye on your momma and Rosie. Cheers Buddy
Sharlene and Molly muffin

Trish
02-19-2014, 05:58 PM
Happy birthday beautiful Buddy!! That is quite some cake your Mom is wishing for you! :D xxx

labblab
02-19-2014, 06:24 PM
Oh Happy Birthday from me, too, sweet Buddy!! I'll bet my Barkis is lurking behind you, hoping for some crumbs of cake! ;)

Much love to you and your Mom, today and everyday. :o :)

Marianne

Budsters Mom
02-25-2014, 06:00 PM
Hi Mel,

Thank you so much for lighting a candle for Buddy. :) That means so much! I try to keep one lit, but life often gets in the way.:o xxxxxx

Harley PoMMom
02-25-2014, 06:52 PM
Oh Kathy, I am sorry, I don't know how I missed Buddy's birthday.


Happy belated Birthday, dear Buddy!!

Budsters Mom
02-27-2014, 01:40 AM
Buddy had loads of stuff, which Rosie happily inherited. I kept two items (for myself), which Buddy was very attached to. One was a cuddle blanket. The other was his best friend Froggy (a stuffed frog). Buddy used to go find Froggy to sleep with, before going to bed at night. He would then happily curl up and go to sleep with his head resting on Froggy like a pillow.

Froggy and Buddy's blanket are still on the foot of my bed by the wall. It comforts me to know that they are there. Rosie fell asleep on my bed tonight. She was sleeping on Froggy exactly the way Buddy did. It freaked me out!

Trish
02-27-2014, 04:21 AM
Awwww little Minx Rose, still if there was a stuffed toy within striking distance Flynn would grab any opportunity!! Devil cat has a stuffed rabbit and Mum won't let Flynn have it, he stalks around trying to hunt it down!!

Your up late Kathy, not sleeping?

Budsters Mom
03-08-2014, 01:47 AM
Hey Buddy boy,
A piece if my heart went with you when you crossed the bridge. It left a hole that remains unfilled. It hurts as much as ever. Everyone says that it will get easier and I'll only remember the happy times. Well, it hasn't. I really hope that you truly are in a loving, beautiful place. You deserve to know only happiness and love because that's what you so freely gave every day.

I so wish for one more day with you. A day to cuddle and spoil you. A day to show you how much you were and will always be loved. I am so blessed that you chose me to share your precious life with. Thank you for all the lessons you taught me.

Releasing you tore my heart to shreds. It was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. I often think that I did it too soon, but I know in my heart that you were ready. You had a failing body with increasing pain and suffering. You would have held on much longer for me. I know that. I couldn't do that to you.

I will love and miss you always,
Mom

Bo's Mom
03-08-2014, 09:23 AM
((((HUGS)))) I know your precious Buddy is with all the others at the Rainbow Bridge just having a great ole time and sharing all their wonderful experiences they had with their loved ones.

mcdavis
03-08-2014, 07:33 PM
{{{HUGS}}}
Buddy will always have a place in your heart

molly muffin
03-08-2014, 07:58 PM
I think Buddy holds a piece of all our hearts and we were quite lucky that you shared him with us Barbara. Your heart of course is missing a huge junk that belongs to Buddy alone.

love
Sharlene

addy
03-09-2014, 09:03 AM
Thinking of you and Buddy, love you both.

labblab
03-09-2014, 09:11 AM
Me too, Kathy. Me, too!

Budsters Mom
03-21-2014, 01:52 AM
Hey Buddy Boy,

I know that you've moved on. Why can't I? I still feel as lost and as sad as the day you left me. That scenario plays in a constant loop in my head. Others are grieving too. I don't know how to help them because I haven't figured out how to help myself. I have no words of wisdom.

Rosie is 11 months old today. She is nothing like you. She's got the chasing the lizards thing down, but hasn't caught any yet. She'd rather hunt bees and spiders instead. Rosie is sweet like you, but she can also be a little bitchy when she doesn't get her way. You never, ever growled at anyone. Rosie voices her opinion freely. Not in a scary threatening way, more like a little diva temper tantrum. Then she get over it and is happy and delightful again. While you worried and watched out for everyone, Rosie is only concerned with what she wants. That's to be a little velcro dog who gets constant attention. She has much to learn and knows that she's adorable. She is very smart like you and has been very easy to train. How about popping in from time to time to teach her some manners.

I wish I could turn back time to when you were happy and healthy and keep doing that until it was time for us to leave this world together. Since that isn't possible, never doubt that you are truly loved every minute of every day forever. Be happy my little love.

Mom

mcdavis
03-21-2014, 08:57 PM
Oh Kathy, I don't have any words of wisdom but just wanted you to know you're not alone - HUGS

Budsters Mom
03-30-2014, 02:30 AM
I am so sorry that I couldn't do more for you Buddy Boy. It broke my heart to let you go. It was much too soon and I feel robbed. Robbed of the one and only who truly loved me for me. My precious boy who stayed by my side to comfort me through illnesses and tough times. My little soulmate who loved with ever fiber of your being and never asking for anything in return. There will never be another like you as you are one of a kind. I truly thought that it would be getting a little easier to go on by now, but I was wrong. I still ache for you and miss you terribly. I truly hope that you are happily chasing lizards at the bridge. Even if you aren't, at least you are no longer in pain. That was one thing that I could do for you, my sweet boy.

Love you always,

Mom

Woodydog
04-05-2014, 05:44 PM
Kathy

I,m so sorry that you are still hurting. I have no words of wisdom as I don,t understand my own grief just know that you are in my thoughts.

((((Hugs)))

Budsters Mom
04-05-2014, 08:31 PM
Aw thanks, Tracy. I know how much you miss Woody too. :o

I really thought that it would be getting easier by now, but it hasn't. Rosie helps, but she is not Buddy and will never be. I know that you understand. xxxxx

Budsters Mom
04-15-2014, 06:42 PM
Tracy, thank you so much for lighting a candle for Buddy and for thinking of us. xxxxxx

Woodydog
04-16-2014, 11:05 AM
Your welcome I'm afraid it's all I can do as I know your hurting xxxx

Budsters Mom
05-02-2014, 12:33 AM
10 months. I miss you as much as ever!:o Love you forever! xxxxxx

Harley PoMMom
05-02-2014, 03:05 PM
((((Hugs))))

apollo6
05-02-2014, 05:04 PM
Dear Kathy
crying reading your thread. Buddy was just so beautiful. The lose is always there(for me almost 2 years). When you deal with this disease it is even harder. The bound is there until you are together in heaven. Buddy may you be watching over your Mom.
With love and hugs.
Sonja and Angel Apollo

Trish
05-02-2014, 06:18 PM
Hi Kathy

Gosh that time has gone so fast and so slow all at the same time if that makes sense. Sending a big hug and lizard to heaven for Buddy to chase! xx

Budsters Mom
05-20-2014, 02:06 AM
Hey Bud,

We just went through another big fire scare. Do you remember the last one? I do. You never left my side. You were always watching out for us and soothing me when I was sad, sick or scared.

Monkey girl is loving and adorable, just like you. She is in her own little blissful world, oblivious to anything else. Maybe that's not a bad way to be. She doesn't seem to worry about anything. You worried about everything and couldn't rest until everyone was home for the night. I wish you could come back and give her a few pointers, but she is doing well.

As far as being a hunter, she isn't! She chases those lizards and is just about as fast as you are, but hasn't caught any. Once they run into a bush or a hole in the fence, she gives up. Out of sight, out of mind, she moves on to something else. You used to jump in those bushes after them and all I would see was your stubby little tail. A few minutes later, you would be out with your prize. You will always be the mighty lizard Hunter!

I hope you are having fun over the rainbow bridge with all the others. I heard they have rainbow lizards up there!

Love you and miss you forever and a day,
Mom

Budsters Mom
06-27-2014, 11:57 PM
Where did the last year go, Buddy boy? School is out for Summer and that's supposed to be our time together. Time to sleep in and cuddle late into the morning. Time for long park walks and endless belly rubs and butt scratches. Our time to hang out together. I always counted the days until break, waiting to spend lots of time with my very special boy.

You crossed over on July 2nd of last year. I still ache for you, every single day. I miss you as much as ever. Sure, people say the right things, but it's not enough. It will NEVER be enough! :o

I truly hope your spirit soars with all our other beloved fur angels, so you are never alone. You never liked being alone.

Until we meet again my little love, you will always hold a special place in my heart,

I have Rosie now. She hasn't replaced you. No fur baby EVER could.
Whenever she wears one of your little shirts or plays with your toys, I smile and think of you.

Love and miss you forever and a day,

Mom

scoora
07-01-2014, 06:03 AM
Kathy,
I cried reading what you said to Buddy. I know exactly how you are feeling.
Today is a year since Scoop left us and it still hurts. Lots.
I love all my boys so very much but the pain is still there.
Thinking of you and Buddy, especially tomorrow.
Love and hugs.

Robert
07-01-2014, 05:21 PM
Thinking and praying for you and buddy as the one year mark is here. You are a special person who helps others so much and buddy was a lucky dog to have found you and shared his life with you.

molly muffin
07-01-2014, 07:22 PM
Sending big hugs Kathy!!
Sharlene and molly muffin

Harley PoMMom
07-01-2014, 08:54 PM
Sending big hugs, too.

Meg_Elizabeth
07-01-2014, 10:29 PM
Kathy, your beautiful post to Buddy has me shaking with tears. I can't imagine how hard these next few days will be, but I am always here whenever you need me and you are always in my thoughts and heart. Buddy was so lucky to have you as a mommy, Im sure hes loving doggy heaven and smiling down on you and Rosie.
Stay strong and know that you'll meet again. :)

-Meg

paulawhitcomb
07-02-2014, 02:12 AM
After I read your post!, I feel how much you love you beautiful buddy boy and you are so missing him a lot.

Trish
07-02-2014, 06:04 AM
Hey Kathy

I know today is going to be a hard one for you, so I am stopping by before bed to give you a big old hug to start your day. I remember Buddy well, sharing all the stories about him really brought him to life and off this screen, so I will join you today in remembering him fondly and with a smile on my face as his life is truly worth celebrating.... Lizards for Dinner for Buddy Boy!!! Big Hugs xxxxxxxx

scoora
07-02-2014, 06:15 AM
Kathy,
Sending you hugs.
Today will be a tough one. I know how it feels.
Thinking of you and Buddy today.

labblab
07-02-2014, 06:48 AM
My dear Kathy, thinking of you and our beloved Buddy first thing this morning. I know you think about him every morning, but still, today is different. Please know your family here is holding you both safely in our hearts. And I love and "second" Trish's salute: "Lizards for Dinner!!!"

In the meantime, sending many hugs to you and Buddy's baby sister,
Marianne

molly muffin
07-02-2014, 07:55 AM
Hi Kathy, thinking of you and Buddy today. What great memories you two shared together and we thank you for sharing him with us. There will never be another mighty lizard hunter to rival your Buddy.
Sending love and hugs to you today and a few smiles as fond memories tumble around in my head.
love
Sharlene and molly muffin

Tina
07-02-2014, 08:32 AM
Hi Kathy,

I'm thinking of you and Buddy today also. I know how tough these anniversaries can be, and I know today will be difficult. A smile comes to my face as I remember all of his stories and adventures. We are all here with you today Kathy.

Love and big hugs,

Tina and Jasper xo

Budsters Mom
07-02-2014, 10:59 AM
Angels, Thanks for all the love to wake up to this morning and for joining me in celebrating Buddy's amazing life.

I put off going to sleep last night hoping that today would never come, yet here it is! :o

No one talks about Buddy anymore unless I make a comment about him. My folks didn't care when I mentioned this dreaded anniversary fast approaching. Their comment was, "Well, we have Rosie now." Like that comment somehow makes it all better. IT DOESN'T! I still feel terribly sad and don't even want to get up this morning. :(:(:o:o

Thanks again for remembering us on this day. Xxxxxx

Kathy

apollo6
07-02-2014, 12:58 PM
Dear Kathy
What you are feeling is normal. Family often doesn't understand the depth of our sorrow and grief. You understand only too well how you feel. It is almost two years since Apollo's passing and all I want is to have him back.
That is why you come here to get the love,support and comfort you need.
Loving thoughts
Sonja and Angel Apollo

mcdavis
07-02-2014, 09:11 PM
Kathy, thinking of you and Buddy today.
{{{{{HUGS}}}}}

Budsters Mom
07-19-2014, 03:02 AM
Many members has sent me PM's asking specific questions as to how I have been dealing with the loss of Buddy. Please know that these comments reflect my feelings about this very difficult subject. Others may feel differently and that's perfectly okay. I have been told many times in messages that I am very brave. I need to dispel that myth right now. I am not brave. I am human. I am damaged and I am sad. I did what many others on this forum have done. I released my best friend, so he wouldn't suffer. A large chunk of my heart went with Buddy when he crossed over that day. I was the last thing he saw as he closed his eyes for the last time. I told him to go get the lizards as my heart was torn to shreds. I went into shock immediately following Buddy's release. I couldn't even go home because I wasn't ready to face my family. They begged me not to take him, but I knew it was the right thing to do. The only thing that I could do for Buddy.

Know that grief comes in waves. There is no time frame, so be gentle with yourself when the time comes. Our family here held me together when I was in shock and unable to function. Losing a beloved fur baby breaks your heart, but you are never alone. There are always angels here who understand.

Kathy

Robert
07-25-2014, 04:36 AM
Many members has sent me PM's asking specific questions as to how I have been dealing with the loss of Buddy. Please know that these comments reflect my feelings about this very difficult subject. Others may feel differently and that's perfectly okay. I have been told many times in messages that I am very brave. I need to dispel that myth right now. I am not brave. I am human. I am damaged and I am sad. I did what many others on this forum have done. I released my best friend, so he wouldn't suffer. A large chunk of my heart went with Buddy when he crossed over that day. I was the last thing he saw as he closed his eyes for the last time. I told him to go get the lizards as my heart was torn to shreds. I went into shock immediately following Buddy's release. I couldn't even go home because I wasn't ready to face my family. They begged me not to take him, but I knew it was the right thing to do. The only thing that I could do for Buddy.

Know that grief comes in waves. There is no time frame, so be gentle with yourself when the time comes. Our family here held me together when I was in shock and unable to function. Losing a beloved fur baby breaks your heart, but you are never alone. There are always angels here who understand.

Kathy

Great post .....sums up how I feel and felt too. RIP tommy aka boof and Tammy. Love and miss both of you so bad

Budsters Mom
07-26-2014, 03:40 AM
Hey Bud,

I need to find a way to help someone who desperately needs it. I don't know if there is anything I can do, but I need to try. You were always by my side whenever I was worried about someone and couldn't sleep. Knowing you were there made all the difference. I so wish you were here now to help me find the right words to say.

Love you and miss you forever and a day,

Mom

apollo6
07-30-2014, 12:15 PM
I know to well how you feel. Sometimes just listening and comforting can help others. When we are still grieving our selves there s not much left over for others.
Sonja and Angel Apollo
Buddy was your rock ,your foundation.

Budsters Mom
08-09-2014, 03:03 AM
Hey Bud,

I had the title changed and closed your thread yesterday. I changed the title to reflect your struggle. Those horrible headaches that are now gone and your poor legs giving out on you when you tried to run or get up. Your struggle getting up the ramp to guard and not being able to get through your doggy door to get out, to name a few. There were many. You were a very brave little warrior. The change was made so others needing information could find what they were searching for easier.

I had you thread closed because our journey together here on earth ended over 13 months ago. I know that you have moved on and I'm glad that you are now pain free, but I have not been able to do the same. I am stuck in limbo unable to move forward. I miss you as much as ever, especially cuddles and massages in the morning while you were waking up. I miss my nosy little shadow hanging on every word. So Buddy, I closed your thread. Our adventure is over, but you are forever loved and cherished and never forgotten.

Your memory thread will remain open. I'll be dropping in to talk with you and others may want to comment as they remember things also. You will always be our Mighty Lizard Hunter. No other fur baby will ever overtake your title here on the forum.

Your little sister Rosie is a handful. She will never replace you because you are irreplaceable, but she does keep me company like you used to.

Well Bud, I so wish you could have stayed with me until I was ready to cross the bridge, so we could have gone together. Drop in every now and then to visit and check out Rosie. She'll give you a laugh, that's for sure.

Love you and miss you forever and a day,

Mom

apollo6
08-11-2014, 12:47 PM
Dear Kathy, I only know to well what your sweetlBuddy went through. Apollo had many of the same ailments. I looked at Buddy's pictures and can understand only to well that this little Angel was bigger than life. A part of you died when he left. It is almost two years and I will never get over losing Apollo. Seeing them suffer as they did only makes it harder. Comfort yourself with knowing you both fought as hard and as long as you did. Oh dear,the tears are coming again.
Hugs for you and a hug for Buddy in heaven. Know Apollo and Buddy are running free without pain.
Sonja and Angel Apollo

addy
08-11-2014, 01:27 PM
hugs, Kathy

mcdavis
08-11-2014, 08:39 PM
Oh Kathy {{{hugs}}}
You did everything you possibly could for Buddy, and his thread will help many others.

scoora
08-11-2014, 09:07 PM
Kathy,
Big, loving hugs

Robert
08-12-2014, 03:10 AM
Hugs and prayers

Budsters Mom
08-16-2014, 09:55 PM
Hey little Dude,

There haven't been any alligator lizards at all this year. You wiped them out before you moved on. Such a mighty hunter!!! :D:D We only have the small ones now that are lightning fast. Those are almost impossible to catch, although you did manage to catch quite a few. ;):D Rosie chases them, but hasn't caught any. She is very fast, but not as determined as you were.

You were absolutely obedient at all times. You even stayed perfectly still for your ultrasound. Rosie knows the commands, but only follows them if she's in the mood and there is nothing better to do.

I know that this is almost impossible to understand or believe, but Rosie doesn't care at all about food or treats.:eek::eek::eek: Isn't that crazy! It's hard for me to believe too.

I so wish I was able to turn back the clock and start all over again with you. Fly free sweet boy.

Love you and miss you forever and a day,
Mom

Squirt's Mom
08-24-2014, 05:46 PM
Dean Koontz is one of my favorite authors, one reason is that dogs are just about always part of the story and often play a prominent role even tho his stories are about the supernatural. In Dragon Tears a dog is a key character who helps a group of people in danger from a young man who possesses unusual "gifts". Koontz takes the reader into this dog's thoughts with his typical dash of humor. In my reading last night I read the following and couldn't help but think of Buddy.


A little lizard! Zip, so fast, across the stones, get it, get it, get it, get it. This way, that way, this way, between your legs, that way, here it comes, there it goes – now where is it? – over there, zip, don’t let it get away, get it, get it, want it, need it, bang, an iron fence out of nowhere.

Budsters Mom
08-26-2014, 03:13 PM
Thanks for moving Leslie's post here. It is sooooo Buddy! It made me smile.:p

He will always remain a mighty lizard hunter. So much passion wrapped in that little body. He would jump into bushes and claw under fences to hunt out his prey. I would have to physically pick him up and bring him inside to keep him from tearing up his paws and to give the lizard a chance to escape. Otherwise, he would sit and stare at a hole in the fence all day, waiting for it to resurface. He could sniff them out and very few got away. Once caught, he often brought them in through the doggie door to show me. He was soooo proud! :D

addy
08-27-2014, 07:16 PM
Special moments can make us smile,sometimes through tears but smile nonetheless.

Big hugs

Budsters Mom
08-28-2014, 12:52 AM
So true Addy, so true.:p

Budsters Mom
09-11-2014, 02:25 AM
Hey little man,

I still miss you so much! It just wasn't long enough. It never would have been long enough. :o

I am feeling very sad. It will be my birthday in about a half an hour and we are supposed to spend it together. 9-11 is such a sucky birthday anyway, but you always made it okay. You made everything okay for me. That's what you did.

I want a do over!:(

Love you and miss you forever and a day,
Mom

Budsters Mom
10-25-2014, 02:06 PM
Hey Dude,

I hope you are having an awesome time chasing all those rainbow lizards and hanging out with our other fur angels.

I just wanted you to know that I changed your avatar for Halloween. It is one of my favorites.:p I will change it once again for Christmas. You were always such a great sport when I chose to put something silly on you. That makes me smile even now.:)

I love and miss you forever and a day,

Mom

apollo6
10-25-2014, 03:12 PM
What a great picture. Buddy watch over your Mom.
Sonja,Apollo

addy
10-26-2014, 02:09 PM
That is one of my top picks for your avatar, I just love it, Kathy.

What a good boy, Buddy to let mama dress you up and have fun with it all.

Happy Halloween to all our heavenly fur balls. I am hoping you all now can eat chocolate without getting sick!!! I I know Zoe would think that "heavenly":):):):):):):):):)

mcdavis
10-28-2014, 08:41 PM
I do love that avatar Kathy.

molly muffin
10-28-2014, 08:52 PM
I like that picture too. Buddy sure knew how to wear a costume!

hugs

jas77450
11-01-2014, 08:49 PM
Buddy is sooo cute. I always think of my little buddy when I see him. Those spunky boys are running together I'm sure.

jas77450
11-01-2014, 08:51 PM
My Beautiful Buddy Boy,

You brought light where there was darkness.

Joy where there was sorrow.

Companionship where there was loneliness.

Smiles where there were frowns.

You taught me how to love unconditionally by example.

You were such a large presence in such a little body.

A soul wiser than all.

Accepting of all.

Giving to all.

Loving all and expecting nothing in return.

You left me much too soon. I had many more lessons to learn and you taught them so well.

Thank you for loving me so much and for taking such great care of me every day. I am the person I am today because of you, my precious boy.

Hunt free little man. Be happy and do not worry about me. We will be reunited when the time is right. Until then, greet the newcomers with the same love and tenderness that you gave me so freely.

Love you always my Mighty lizard Hunter.
Mom

This is BEAUTIFUL!!!

Budsters Mom
11-01-2014, 09:06 PM
Thank you.:p

It's been a while since I have read through that. Thank you so much for bumping it up. ;) It doesn't even touch the impact Buddy had on my life, but it's the closest I could come.

Budsters Mom
12-01-2014, 03:18 PM
Hey Dude,

Another holiday season has arrived. Nothing is the same without you here with me. :o That was evident over Thanksgiving break. Rosie was delighted to have me home and she's adorable, but she's not you. I still want you. I went through the motions doing the same kinds of things with Rosie that I did with you. It just didn't feel right. Something was missing. That something was your presence and sweet nature. You always watched out for everyone. Rosie is obsessed with herself, oblivious to anyone else. She's a in the moment kind of monkey. Act first. No sense thinking about it.;)

Please continue to welcome the newcomers as they arrive. Unfortunately, there will always be more.:o:(

Happy hunting, our Mighty Lizard Hunter. :p

Love and miss you forever and a day,

Mom

mytil
12-01-2014, 04:36 PM
Big (((((hugs))))) Kathy. I know your boy is watching over you and Rosie. These bonds will go on forever with very long heart strings between us and the Rainbow Bridge.

Terry

molly muffin
12-01-2014, 05:54 PM
Awww, Buddy the mighty lizard hunter is sure missed by a lot of us. I hope he is getting tons of belly rubs at the rainbow bridge in between chasing lizards of course.

hugs Kathy

Budsters Mom
12-01-2014, 10:26 PM
Thank you Ladies.:p

Everything is different. It should be getting easier by now. :o

addy
12-02-2014, 07:28 PM
I think maybe when we love them that much and fight that hard it doesn't get easier, maybe it just changes a bit on some days.

Big hugs Kathy, we never forget, we continue to love with every fiber of our being.

Buddy, check in on Zoe for me. She shoul be running with Alivia
and Apollo anywhere there may be food.:)

Robert
12-03-2014, 12:29 AM
I think maybe when we love them that much and fight that hard it doesn't get easier, maybe it just changes a bit on some days.

Big hugs Kathy, we never forget, we continue to love with every fiber of our being.

Buddy, check in on Zoe for me. She shoul be running with Alivia
and Apollo anywhere there may be food.:)

They will be fighting tommy and Tammy for it!!!! Lol

Budsters Mom
12-03-2014, 12:49 AM
I never thought if it that way, but I think you're right Addy. My life was intertwined with Buddy's needs for so long, that I feel lost without that focus of being constantly needed. Weird huh?:confused:


I think maybe when we love them that much and fight that hard it doesn't get easier, maybe it just changes a bit on some days.

Squirt's Mom
12-03-2014, 08:51 AM
I think we suffer the same things a human caretaker does when our babies pass. All of our energies, thoughts, actions - everything has been for them and when they are no longer in need, we are completely lost. I am anyway.

apollo6
12-23-2014, 10:15 PM
Dear Kathy
You have been so kind to me . I feel selfish for not thinking about your needs. It is so hard to get through. Over two years and I still struggle with guilt,lose.emptiness and that is okay.
When you have fought so hard and long for your furballs, it takes a long time to adjust. They will always be a part of you,there well be moments out of the blue and the lose hits you, there will be moments when the love and memories will hit you. When you love so deeply and are loved so deeply the bound does not die but goes with you when you die. Only we can understand.
Love always
Sonja and Apollo

Budsters Mom
12-23-2014, 10:22 PM
I agree completely.;) They have stolen our hearts and we will never be the same. Thank you so much for your sweet note. xxxxoooo


When you love so deeply and are loved so deeply the bound does not die but goes with you when you die. Only we can understand

Budsters Mom
12-27-2014, 03:24 AM
Hi Bud,

Thanks for dropping by. It meant so much:p Yes, Rosie is a work in progress. She is nothing like you, but she's very special too.

Love you and miss you forever and a day,

Mom

Budsters Mom
01-01-2015, 12:10 AM
Hi Sweet boy,

Another year has come and gone and still no Buddy boy to make me smile. I often drift off in my sleep to calmer, simpler times. Times when it was just the two of us doing nothing in particular. You by my side, watching, listening, caring and loving. Then I wake to the reality that you are gone. No smiling on cue, no Sunday morning cuddles in bed, no one sitting in window waiting for me to come home from work. No sweet boy to see, smell, feel or hold on to. The bottom of your feet always smelled like Fritos. That always seemed weird to be, but I sure miss that smell now. I would love to be able to turn back the clock to when you were a puppy and start fresh again. Back to a time I had never heard of Cushing's. Back to the time you could run and play without head tremors and your legs giving out. A pain free time full of hunting those pesky lizards and yapping at the birds who had nerve enough to invade your airspace. Then reality sets in once more and my beautiful dream ends until we meet again.

Please continue to welcome the new arrivals which keep on coming. There is plenty of room for all over the rainbow bridge and many lizards to hunt. Happy hunting my precious boy.

Love you and miss you forever and a day,
Mom

Budsters Mom
02-02-2015, 11:36 PM
Hey Bud,

Rosie was happily chewing away at one of your chew bones today. I have no idea where she found it. It was the blue one with the raised dental bumps. You never liked it anyway, but that's not the point. Once I realize what she had, I took it away and burst out in tears. She looked at me as if I was crazy and I was at that moment. I stared at her and that silly bone for several minutes before giving her back her prize.

There are so many reminders of you everywhere. They pop up and catch me off guard when I least expect it. I don't know if I'm happy or sad about that. Probably a little of both.

Well buddy boy, in a couple weeks it'll be your birthday. That's a perfect example of a happy and sad day.

Love you and miss you forever and a day,
Mom

addy
02-04-2015, 01:18 PM
Oh Cathy-lit was like when I found Zoe's red Kong in the umbrella stand. I can so relate. I too gave her Kong to Koko although it was hard to do.

Big hugs and lots of love. We both have emotional days coming up :(

apollo6
02-06-2015, 02:31 PM
Dear Cathy
Buddy will always be in your heart and soul. There will always be parts of him around you. It has been almost three years for me and I still cry about Apollo. Ariel wants to only play with Apollo's toys and I get angry at him trying to destroy them.
Hugs Sonja and Angel Apollo

Robert
02-06-2015, 03:17 PM
Yer I have a few things from tommy and tam my put away eWith their urns. I miss em still.

Budsters Mom
02-19-2015, 03:01 PM
Happy Birthday Buddy boy!:p I hope there are plenty of lizards to chase and hunt today. Party hardy with the others.;)

So wish I could turn back the clock to when you were healthy, pain free and strong. I was so blessed and didn't even know it at the time. You were so easy and such a sweet, agreeable little chap.

Keep an eye out out for Monkey girl. She's a daredevil with a mind of her own.:D

Love you and miss you forever and a day,
Mom

addy
02-19-2015, 03:54 PM
Been thinking of you and Buddy all day so sneaking in from work to wish Buddy a Happy Birthday and tell him not to let Zoe eat too much cake!!!

Big hugs, Kathy, always in my thoughts.

addy

Harley PoMMom
02-19-2015, 04:27 PM
Happy Birthday, dear Buddy...Hopefully my 3 boys will not get you into some mischief.

In loving memory of sweet Buddy, always.

Huge and loving hugs being sent to you and our Monkey girl.

molly muffin
02-19-2015, 05:24 PM
Happy Birthday Buddy, the Lizard Boy! I hope you are chasing lizards and having endless parties across the rainbow bridge.

huggers Kathy

scoora
02-19-2015, 08:33 PM
Happy Birthday to you Buddy!

Budsters Mom
02-19-2015, 11:34 PM
Too late Addy. Buddy already told Zoe and Apollo that they could have as much cake as they want, as long as they don't mind rainbow lizards dancing on top if it.;):D

Thanks all for your loving birthday wishes for my mighty lizard hunter. :p


tell him not to let Zoe eat too much cake

Robert
02-20-2015, 03:08 AM
It's buddy's birthday today in Australia so three cheers for the birthday boy!! I'm sure tom and tam are throwing a party for him!!

labblab
02-20-2015, 06:18 AM
Happy, Happy Birthday Week, sweet Buddy Boy!!! :D :) :D

Hope you have a nice sleep-in this morning after your party, but I'll bet all your pals still have some more fun up their sleeves...er, fur...for today! ;) :p

Much love from Auntie Marianne

apollo6
02-20-2015, 10:19 PM
Happy birthday sweet Buddy. I told Apollo to give you a great birthday party with Squirt, Zoe and our other Angels.
Sonja

mcdavis
02-21-2015, 12:26 PM
Sorry we're a bit late but hopefully Buddy and friends are still partying.

Squirt's Mom
02-21-2015, 12:48 PM
We're late to the party, too! Happy Birthday, Buddy!

Tina
02-23-2015, 09:10 AM
Happy belated Birthday Buddy!!! I am certain you had quite the party with all your friends at the bridge. I bet the lizards were all worn out! I hope you didn't let my Dakota eat all the cake. :)

Kathy, thanks so much for your post on Dakota's thread. It seems that this is a tough month for many of us on the forum.

Hugs,
Tina and Jasper xo

Budsters Mom
06-29-2015, 03:36 PM
Oh Buddy boy,

On July 2 you flew two years ago. You would never guess what has happened here as we approach our second anniversary. We are overrun with baby lizards. There are literally hundreds of them in the backyard scurrying everywhere! They are about 2 inches Long from head to tail and super skinny. You would've been in heaven on earth!

Rosie will never be a mighty lizard Hunter, but she manages to catch several a day. She doesn't drop them on command like you did. I have to pry them from her mouth. Some I manage to save. Some are not so lucky and end up in the lizard graveyard over the fence. There have been a lot of cats hanging around the backyard trying to get the lizards. You never would have allowed that! Thus is the circle of life.

While you were on patrol, birds did not have the nerve to invade your airspace, moreless a cat entering any part of the yard or a baby lizard explosion occurring. Time rolls on baby boy. I so wish I could turn back the clock about 10 years and do it all again.

I hope you're happy. Keep welcoming the newbies with that beautiful smile.

Love you forever and a day,
Mom

Budsters Mom
06-30-2015, 04:20 PM
Thanks for the candle Marianne. It was very sweet. It's tough right now. Damn tough!:o:(

Then again, I haven't really faced Buddy's loss, so what do I expect?:confused:

labblab
06-30-2015, 04:59 PM
Oh you are so welcome, Kathy. And I wish I had some great advice to offer, but as you probably saw, I had to go back and add another candle for Barkis, too. Even after all these years, I still miss him so dearly. :o

molly muffin
06-30-2015, 07:16 PM
I don't know if the missing part every goes away. I don't think so. I'll always miss my Tasha and Tipsy and it's been many many years.

big hugs kathy and marianne too. Sometimes we just need a hug.

Budsters Mom
06-30-2015, 07:19 PM
Yes Marianne, I did notice that you lit a candle for your sweet boy too.

I am not looking for great advice or for anyone to fix me. That would definitely be a full-time job for a whole boatload of people! ;)

Our family here is a safe place where we can unite to talk about those that we have loved and lost with family who understand. It is okay not to be okay sometimes. Not everyone understands that. We get that here. We don't have to pretend. We can be ourselves.

scoora
07-01-2015, 10:36 PM
Kathy,
I know it's been a while but I think of you and everyone here.
I want you to know I am thinking of you and Buddy. It's been 2 years.
Hardly seems possible. Seems like yesterday.
Lots of hugs!

Budsters Mom
07-02-2015, 05:51 PM
Hi Tina,

Thank you so much for lighting a candle for Buddy and for remembering us on this day.

Thinking of you and Jasper. Please update when you can.

Hugs,
Kathy

Squirt's Mom
07-03-2015, 11:03 AM
Remembering our brave lizard hunter, Buddy! I am sure he is keeping the Rainbow Fields clear of lizards...well unless someone wants to play with one then I'm just as sure he will herd one or three their way. :p

apollo6
07-03-2015, 01:17 PM
In memory of sweet Buddy.
Sonja

Robert
07-03-2015, 05:28 PM
Thinking of and praying for Buddy in particular but also all the other pups who have left us.

Budsters Mom
07-03-2015, 09:38 PM
Thank you all!

molly muffin
07-05-2015, 09:40 AM
Buddy is unforgettable. He was so full of personality and adorable quirks. The mighty lizard hunter. Lol. That always made me laugh.

Bo's Mom
07-07-2015, 08:35 PM
I was thinking of Buddy today because my little Latte caught his first lizard today and actually played with it for a while. He got a taste of it and immediately spit it out and shook his head like this isn't good. But, I have a feeling Bo and Buddy have got together and Bo was trying to tell Latte that he has to search and find those lizards. Latte for weeks has tried to catch them and has been so unsuccessful. But today, he did it!!! He just needed some lessons from the best Lizard Hunter ever!!

Meg_Elizabeth
07-09-2015, 03:18 AM
I pray Abby has found beautiful Buddy in heaven and our jumping around and playing together. What a wonderful, unforgettable pup. Thinking of you.

-Meg

Budsters Mom
07-09-2015, 01:58 PM
Buddy is chick magnet.:D

He has a killer smile that the babes can't get enough of. No doubt that Abby has found him and is hanging out with the other gals watching the mighty hunter round up the lizards in the rainbow fields, then following him around adoringly. lol ;):D

Budsters Mom
11-26-2015, 12:30 PM
AWWWW! There's my little elf! :p

addy
11-26-2015, 10:11 PM
I love our little elf:)

apollo6
11-27-2015, 12:19 PM
The best elf ever, sweet Buddy.
Sonja ,Apollo

Budsters Mom
11-27-2015, 12:30 PM
Thanks dear friends.:p

Budsters Mom
02-18-2016, 12:49 AM
Well Buddy boy, how can another birthday come rolling around already? I know that your spirit is flying free of pain and suffering and that's where you need to be, but I still miss you so much. :o

Rosie is Rosie. She is an opinionated little twit. She's not anywhere near as easy going and obedient as you my precious boy. She even growls when displeased with something or another. It's a low, weak, harmless growl, but still a growl. You never growled at anyone, even once. I didn't appreciate how easy and cooperative you were. Rosie is cute and certainly not dull. Trustworthy she is not. She acts like a busy two-year-old always getting into things. I know I shouldn't compare the two of you, but I think it's unavoidable. You were a tough act to follow.

I don't post much on your thread because it always makes me feel so very sad. Know that you are always on my mind and in my heart.

Love you and miss you forever and a day,
Mom

tank&kat
02-18-2016, 02:09 AM
I just read through your entire thread and managed to keep it together until you mentioned the smell of Buddy's feet. I'm always smelling my dog's paws. Not sure what they smell like exactly but I can't get enough of it. I can say that now cause I'm not the only one.

Your emotion is as raw as can be and I admire your courage as well as your vulnerability. I have had my dog with me for almost 15 years now (half of my life). I thought that by reading other people's stories it would help to prepare me for when it's his time to go. I couldn't have been more wrong. I don't regret reading about Buddy. I have gotten to know just one of the many dogs here that have passed and I can't tell you enough how sorry I am that it has to hurt so much.

I have a good feeling if Buddy and Rosie were together, they would somehow balance each other out lol. Your Buddy sounds much like my Tank. Very calm, protective and carefree. I am sure he watches over you everyday protecting you, just as you protected him.

~Katherine

apollo6
02-18-2016, 12:00 PM
Dear sweet Buddy,
May you have a beautiful birthday in heaven. You are special and will always be in your Mom's heart and soul.
Love Sonja, Apollo

tank&kat
02-18-2016, 04:47 PM
Also...does Rosie really not like treats??

molly muffin
02-18-2016, 05:10 PM
There never will be another awesome lizard hunter like Buddy. Hugs Kathy.

Budsters Mom
02-18-2016, 05:51 PM
Hi, Rosie has a string of allergies a mile long.:o She has never been interested in food, including treats. There is a very limited number of things that she can eat. She'll eat if she gets hungry enough, but otherwise forget it. Not interested.

Buddy's Cushings journey can be found on his thread below. Be forewarned that his thread has more than 1500 posts! It is more than a little light reading!:eek:

http://www.k9cushings.com/forum/showthread.php?t=5121

Kathy



Also...does Rosie really not like treats??

tank&kat
02-19-2016, 02:06 PM
1500 posts...that's nothing. Really, for me it's not. :)

mcdavis
02-19-2016, 07:44 PM
Sorry it's a day late but HAPPY BIRTHDAY to the mighty lizard hunter at the Rainbow Bridge.
It's so hard Kathy - HUGS

Budsters Mom
02-19-2016, 08:13 PM
Your not late at all! Buddy's actual birthday is on the 19th!;) Thanks for caring. It means a lot.

Harley PoMMom
02-19-2016, 09:11 PM
Wishing our dear Buddy a Happy Birthday!

Sending huge and loving hugs, Lori

Budsters Mom
07-02-2016, 01:07 PM
Three years today. :o I hope you are happy.

Harley PoMMom
07-02-2016, 02:01 PM
((((Hugs))))

labblab
07-02-2016, 02:04 PM
Giant hugs from me, too, Kathy. Buddy's probably been very busy showing the ropes to all our new arrivals, and Rainbow Bridge could not have a sweeter ambassador. :o :o :o

Trish
07-02-2016, 04:17 PM
Unless your a lizard :) big hugs Kathy xx

scoora
07-02-2016, 07:54 PM
Kathy,
When this time of the year comes I always have Buddy and you in my thoughts.
Big hugs to you and to Rosie!

Budsters Mom
07-02-2016, 10:03 PM
Thanks dear friends.:p

molly muffin
07-03-2016, 12:34 AM
Gosh 3 years already! I am sure he has made plenty of new friends and is having a great time showing them all how to be great lizard hunters. Lol

addy
07-03-2016, 12:30 PM
Our lizard loving boy will always be here and in our hearts. I can smile thinking of how many of us fell in love with Buddy.

I loved all his outfits, he always looked so adorable.

Kathy, three years or thirty, memory will be the same, love the same, our heart dogs.

Hope you and Rosie are well.

apollo6
07-03-2016, 02:01 PM
Sweet loveable Buddy. It does not matter how long they have been gone we will always miss them. Buddy make sure Apollo, Scoopy, Zoe, and ll the other fur babies give you the best birthday. Don't party to much, we just might hear the noise down here. Love Sonja

Budsters Mom
07-04-2016, 01:42 AM
Thank you ladies.:p

Heart dogs..... They own your heart forever... They leave a gaping hole that will never be filled.:o

kanga
07-04-2016, 01:58 AM
Such a good tribute to a good and a beautiful boy!
You may Rest In Peace now.

addy
07-04-2016, 01:34 PM
So I thought it was fireworks off in the distance last night, echoing from the lake.

Now I rather think it was our brood having a rip roaring party:)

That image in my mind is awesome.

Budsters Mom
02-19-2017, 01:25 PM
Happy Birthday Buddy!!!! Hope you are having a grand ole time with your pals at the rainbow fields.

14 years ago you changed my life forever. Such a perfect little boy. I miss you so very much.

You never met Rosie, but will someday. She is not like you at all. She having some issues lately and is still very young. Much too young for all of this.

Please try to share the lizards with the other pups. I'm sure there are enough for all. Also, greet all newcomers with your beautiful smile.

Always in my heart,
Mom

Squirt's Mom
02-19-2017, 03:08 PM
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BUDDY!!
Kiss the little dog with the wild yellow hair for me and watch out for her! She will steal your cake!

Harley PoMMom
02-19-2017, 03:34 PM
Happy Birthday, Buddy!!!


Hope you are catching all the lizards you want on your special day.

DoxieMama
02-19-2017, 06:12 PM
Happy Birthday, Buddy!

Tina
07-02-2017, 09:19 AM
Kathy,
Just wanted you to know that I've been thinking about you and sweet Buddy throughout the weekend and especially today. Remembering our brave little boy, the mightiest of lizard hunters. Hugs to you Kathy, I truly understand how much he is missed. xo

Tina

Budsters Mom
07-02-2017, 10:47 AM
Awww Tina, Thank you so much! It was so sweet of you to remember that Buddy flew right before the 4th of July holiday. Yes, he was terrified of the fireworks, just like Jasper. I used to sit on the bathroom floor with him. The radio would be playing to help drown out the bursts, until they stopped. Nothing else seemed to help. Although I never got to go see the fireworks myself, I miss our bathroom ritual. Our boys no longer have to suffer through the blasts. No more pain or fear. Blessings mixed with our sorrow. Not theirs of course. They are happy, carefree and puppy like forever.

Four years without the sweetest little guardian and the mightiest of all lizard hunters. Forever in my heart and thoughts.

Budsters Mom
07-02-2017, 01:10 PM
Hey Tina, I just saw the candle you lit for us burning brightly. Thank you for your thoughtfulness. :) Yes, I do believe that our boys are happy and surrounded by many friends and family members who have already passed on. A beautiful loving place with only joy.

Hugs,
Kathy

labblab
07-02-2017, 02:22 PM
How is it possible that it's been four years??? Mighty Lizard Hunter, indeed, and precious angel boy. Kathy, always in loving memory of your beautiful Buddy. He was such a gift to us all.

Budsters Mom
07-02-2017, 03:41 PM
Oh yes, it has been four years. I do not recognize that old lady that I see in the mirror. I don't know when that happened or who that is? :eek::D

Thank you for your sweet message of support Marianne. It means a lot. Buddy is one of a kind. There will never be another living soul like him. If I could turn back the clock, I would in a heartbeat.

Kathy

mcdavis
07-02-2017, 09:27 PM
Four years but it feels like yesterday - Hugs from Henry and I.

Joan2517
07-03-2017, 06:54 AM
Turning back the clock would be wonderful....if only. I wasn't on the forum back then, but still feel like I knew him. Four years....

molly muffin
07-03-2017, 10:34 PM
4 years :( dang, it's like time plays tricks on the mind. It somehow doesn't seem possible when you actually say 4 years that it has been that long.

I wouldn't mind turning back the clock sometimes.

Cheers, to Buddy - the mighty lizard hunter

Budsters Mom
06-27-2018, 07:31 PM
Where does the time go? Another dreaded anniversary will arrive shortly. Yes, it's been five years. At least, that's what the calendar says. I know you have moved on and are happy. I know this because you we're always happy regardless of the challenges came your way. A perfect little boy. I always took you for granted. I didn't realize how easy and perfect you were until things weren't so easy or perfect anymore. Yes, you have moved on and I am forever grateful for that. However, I haven't as of yet and don't see it happening anytime soon.

Always the most loving little boy and the mightiest of all lizard Hunter's. I will always treasure the memories of all of our adventures together. I remember when you brought in your prize through the doggie door to show me. You were so proud of that squirmy lizard that you had spent all day trying to catch. You were always blindly obedient. I told you to drop it and you did immediately. It took off across the room climbing to the top of the drapes within seconds. You were beside yourself with grief, barking hysterically. It is hilarious to think about it now. There were many such adventures and I miss them all.

Thank you so much for being my best friend and savior for so many years. You always took great care of your family, Love and miss you always.

Mom

labblab
06-28-2018, 07:42 AM
Dear Kathy,

We’ve always seen Buddy so clearly through your loving eyes, and that will never change. On mornings like this, our tears blur the images for a time. But the love is unwavering and the clarity always returns. Sadly, so does the pain and the loss and the missing him. I wish I could make that part better, but I know I cannot. But we join you in remembrance and honor and celebration of Buddy’s sweet spirit, today and every day.

My heart is with you as this anniversary arrives, Kathy. I will always remain so deeply sorry for your loss. No matter how many years pass by, that will never change.

Hugs, hugs and more hugs.
Marianne

Harley PoMMom
06-28-2018, 10:56 AM
(((Hugs)))

Joan2517
06-28-2018, 05:38 PM
Anniversaries are so hard. There should be another name for them. I thought after the "firsts" they would get easier...boy, was I wrong. I dread each one...hugs, Kathy.

Budsters Mom
07-03-2019, 07:15 PM
Another year creeps by. 6 years now. Still no Buddy boy sitting at the window waiting for me to come home. No Buddy here at my side. No Buddy to complain to, or share my secrets, stresses, and frustration. No Buddy to care. There will never be another Buddy in my life. My heart dog. My little love. My best friend. Life goes on, only different now.

labblab
07-03-2019, 10:20 PM
Such a huge spirit inhabited that tiny body — it’s no wonder that the hole left behind can never be filled. I remain so sorry for your loss, Kathy, but also so grateful that you shared Buddy with us, and that you allow us to continue to honor him alongside you.

Always in loving memory. Always.

Harley PoMMom
07-06-2019, 11:44 AM
Sending huge loving hugs ♥♥

apollo6
07-09-2019, 01:19 PM
In remembrance of sweet Buddy. Like you Apollo was is my heart dog, over 6 years, still always missing him. Apollo was to me as Buddy was and is to you.
Sending love,warmth and understanding. When you have loved so deeply, you fall even harde.
Sonja and Angel Apollo

Budsters Mom
07-10-2019, 08:11 PM
Thank you all for your kind posts. Also, thanks to Buddy's mystery candle lighter (Marianne). I kept the candle lit for a few more cycles. We have all experienced the loss of at least one heart dog. Very few losses impact the soul as much as losing a heart dog.

labblab
01-14-2020, 10:20 AM
Dear Kathy, just wanted to let you know that I’m thinking about you. I know what a comfort Buddy would have been to you as you face such a challenging time now after your mom’s death. I so wish he was still right there beside you. But I hope you are able to find at least a bit of support and comfort in another way.

Do take as good care of yourself as you can.
Marianne

Budsters Mom
01-14-2020, 10:29 PM
Hi Marianne, Things have gone from bad to worse, if that is even possible. Not going into any details on a public forum, but just know that I can't see anything improving anytime soon. I went back to work yesterday, but will be off Friday for my mom's funeral. Insanity is the only word that comes to my mind right now and that doesn't even cover it. Yes, Buddy would've known exactly what to do. He always knew what to do.

labblab
01-16-2020, 05:31 PM
Kathy, I'm so sorry. I'll surely be thinking about you tomorrow and wishing you strength on such a difficult day. You won't be able to see me, but I hope you'll still be able to fill my hug.

Marianne

labblab
01-26-2020, 01:17 PM
Especially thinking of you again today, Kathy. This past week marked the one-year anniversary of my own mom's death, and her loss still affects me in some way every single day. What has happened to you is huge, as are the changes to your life. I continue to send you my well wishes, and my hope that your burden will soon begin to ease at least a tiny bit.

Budsters Mom
01-26-2020, 09:48 PM
Marianne, Sending you tons of love and hugs! One year is still really new, when it comes to the loss of our mothers. We were very blessed to have had them with us for so long, but the loss is still huge and hurts so very much.

My life and my dad's life totally changed practically overnight. I got my dad through Mom's very religious funeral service and our goodbye at the cemetary. That was gut wrenching! I am finally starting to get a handle on things, although more details seem to pop up daily. I have decided that I do not want to be an adult anymore. Too much pressure and responsibility, with very little control.

Thanks again for thinking of me. Know that I'm sending strength and love back to you!

Budsters Mom
07-02-2020, 09:50 AM
7 years today! So much time at home that I could be spending with you! The country is falling apart. The virus is ragging. Yet, I knew that everything would work out with you by my side. I miss you!

labblab
07-02-2020, 10:04 AM
Oh Kathy, sending you so many hugs from across the miles. We’ll never, ever forget our Mighty Lizard Hunter or the love that you two will share forever.

Stay safe, my friend, and keep Buddy’s brave spirit tucked deep within your heart, giving you strength as well.

Harley PoMMom
07-03-2020, 06:38 AM
Huge hugs from me as well.

Joan2517
07-03-2020, 08:22 AM
Same from me, Kathy. I was thinking the same thing about Lee...she would have loved me being home with her all these months with not much to do but cuddle up and enjoy our time together.

apollo6
07-03-2020, 12:04 PM
Dear Kathy, Marianne and everyone, sending loving thoughts your way. It has been 8 years since Apollo died. He would have loved me being at home. My little rescue Ariel, is keeping me sane during an insane time. I think he is looking down from heaven and seeing the anxiety issues and fears Ariel has and saying I told you that you had a good thing with me. Everyone loved that regal little guy. Keep safe and healthy I still have my 88 year old mother. But worry for her everyday with the COVID 19 outbreak. Love you all.

Budsters Mom
07-26-2021, 06:19 PM
8 years have gone by, yet it seems like yesterday.

Joan2517
07-26-2021, 08:23 PM
Hugs to you, Kathy....

labblab
07-27-2021, 09:19 AM
And more from me, too. No matter how much time passes, forever in our hearts.