My precious Tia

[gatorgirl_bama]

My emotions surge as I write this to my precious Tia...
It’s been one month now and I live with a deep ache in my heart. I would shorten my life on earth to have you back in my arms. I feel so much guilt and have so many regrets since you died.

I cry every time I think of you and I think of you every day. You looked at me with those beautiful deep brown eyes with such love and devotion. You waited for me to come home at the door whenever I left. You always had a kiss for me. We laughed together, cried together, played together and even slept together. My heart aches for you. I know that there will be a day when I don’t cry when I think of you. When I see another baby that looks like you, I won’t feel that pain in my heart. I have so many cherished memories of you that could never be truly expressed through mere words. I will be forever grateful that I was the lucky one to share life on earth with you. One of the most precious gifts from heaven is exactly what you were. You were my best friend and you will be in my heart until the end of time.

I know that you are at peace now. No more pain and sickness. I pray your beautiful spirit is at rest in heaven, and that when it’s time for me to go, I will see you again. I can never say thank you enough for all that you have given me. I will never forget you and I will always love you.

[Squirt's Mom]

A Dogs Message from Heaven

I am sending you this message as I can see you are still having struggles with coping each day since my passing.

You may walk in darkness and your heart is broken with my absence. I haven't left you as you hold me in your heart. Please don't be sad as the light will come shinning through for you. For each day of sunshine, think of it as reminder of me beaming down on you. Be happy that I am no longer in pain from sickness or injury. I don't want you grieving for me for long as it makes me sad to see you in so much hurt. Don't dwell on the guilt you feel for making decisions we both know you had to do and I thank you for releasing me of my sickness.

Cry if you need to miss me if you must, but don't worry about me, I'm in a place I love.

Yesterday I talked with the Creator and he said you'd come one day. I wanted you to know this. So you see I'm happy and I am free. There's nothing to worry me. Dry your eyes and make plans to see me again. I will look for you and when you get here, you will see what a wonderful place this is.

Let me tell you what it's like here in this wonderful place. There are no clouds or dreary rain…Just lot of blue sky and sunshine casted on us from His most gracious presence. There are miles of green grassy fields and meadows of beautiful flowers.

There are no cruel humans to hurt us, just the keepers who have been specially chosen to care for us...

We all get along here large and small. Some of us had a pretty rough life while others were very spoiled. We run and play tag or chase balls. We can be lazy as we want and take long naps. The Creator checks on us each day.

I have met many of your friend’s fur kids here.

It's been neat to see my brothers and sisters again that came here before me. There is never a sad moment. Just so much to keep busy....We get a lot of new kids arriving daily and is fun to show them the ropes here.

We are here waiting here for you when your purpose on Earth is complete. My wish for you is to be happy for me and not sad. It will be the most happiest of reunions and I will lick away all your tears. There will be nothing but good times for ever and ever.

I will let you feel my presence if you will just have faith and allow it to happen.

When the time is right and it will come, I want you to take in another fur kid to care for just as you cared for me and protected me from all harm and gave me the security that I needed all those years. They deserve the life I had with you. Don't think of it as replacing me but giving another the love you have inside you to bring joy to another. I felt honored to a part of your life and you gave me so much of yourself.... That will always be special.

You were my life and I will always love you for that.

I am not that far away and I will be close to you in spirit and will remain in your heart. That is the bond that connects us. Do not think of me when I was at my worst but all the great memories we shared together. I hate to see you cry. I am happy here so be glad for me.

I want to be remembered for all the silly things I did and things we did together. We had some great times together.... So cherish those memories.

So my best friend, until your task on Earth is finished, take care of yourself and help another less fortunate kid to know the love I shared with you and you will be forever rewarded. You will know when the time is right.

Love you Forever,
Your 4 legged soul-mate.

Author...Kay Faulkner

[gatorgirl_bama]

That is absolutely beautiful. I did smile yesterday thinking of how Tia loved the little cloth covered foam balls (before she got sick). We would play "soccer" with them. She was so funny holding the ball with her little foot. She would grab it and run under the end tables and score! She would also get on the bed and I'd toss the ball to her and she would bump it back to me with her nose. She could do this for the longest without missing the ball. I so miss those times.

[Squirt's Mom]

Hold tight those memories, Donna. Cherish them always. It is these memories of our lives shared with these babies that sustains us, keeping them close in our hearts. In time, you will find that you smile more often than cry when you think of your sweet Tia.

Hugs,
Leslie

[gatorgirl_bama]

I love you Tootie (Tia). Mama misses you so much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

It's so hard to sit here and try to type this through all the tears. It's hard to do most everything these days. I miss you baby girl. Miss Tippi still lays on the floor by your bed. She went to your blanket in the living room (I can't seem to put it or your bed away) last night and walked around it and just kept looking at it. I wasn't sure she knew, but I told Daddy then that I think she has finally realized you aren't here. She is getting so old and doesn't see or hear to well. She stands in the back yard some times like she has forgotten what she went to do.

Tank really misses you too. He keeps taking his ball to Miss Tippi and poking it at her trying to get her to play. You know she just barks at him like she always did. He pulls her tail too, but it not the same as he did with you. He knows your gone.

I'll catch Daddy with a tear in his eye when he comes inside sometimes. I know he's been talking to you. You were my baby girl, but he loved you so much.

Well, I guess I'll go. I just wanted to say how much I miss you and I'll love you forever.

Mama

[coco joey's mom]

I am so sorry for your loss. My heart breaks for you, as I know the feeling.

With much love,
Mary

[apollo6]

My heart goes out to you. May your sweet Tia be at peace. What you feel and do is what I did also. It has been a year since my Angel Apollo died and it still hurts. We have these precious angels for such a short time and the love , joy, companionship they give us is priceless. The hardest part is seeing them suffer. Know you did your best and Tia knows it. She is watching over you. Look for the signs.
Maybe this poem may ease your pain a little.
Last Night
I stood by your bed last night, I came to have a peep.
I could see that you were crying, You found it hard to sleep.
I whined to you softly as you brushed away a tear,
"It's me, I haven't left you, I'm well, I'm fine, I'm here."
I was close to you at breakfast, I watched you pour the tea,
You were thinking of the many times, your hands reached down to me.
I was with you at the shops today, Your arms were getting sore.
I longed to take your parcels, I wish I could do more.
I was with you at my grave today, You tend it with such care.
I want to re-assure you, that I'm not lying there.
I walked with you towards the house, as you fumbled for your key.
I gently put my paw on you, I smiled and said " it's me."
You looked so very tired, and sank into a chair.
I tried so hard to let you know, that I was standing there.
It's possible for me, to be so near you everyday.
To say to you with certainty, "I never went away."
You sat there very quietly, then smiled, I think you knew...
in the stillness of that evening, I was very close to you.
The day is over... I smile and watch you yawning
and say "good-night, God bless, I'll see you in the morning."
And when the time is right for you to cross the brief divide,
I'll rush across to greet you and we'll stand, side by side.
I have so many things to show you, there is so much for you to see.
Be patient, live your journey out...then come home to be with me.

- Author unknown
Hugs Sonja and Angel Apollo

[gatorgirl_bama]

Thank you Mary and Sonja.
I know my Tia has lots of cush pups to play with while she waits for me.
Last night my other two babies were in the kitchen with me getting a treat. I looked down and told them that it was just so wrong that their sister wasn't sitting there with them. My husband and I both still say "girls" when it's time to come get a treat, go outside or go to bed. It's been five weeks and I cry as if it were yesterday. I miss her so much.

Much love to you all.

Donna and Angel Tia

[gatorgirl_bama]

Oh Baby Girl how I miss you so. My heart aches to hold you, to look into your beautiful eyes, to feel your heart beat, just once more. But I know once more wouldn't be enough. I remember every moment we spent together, every second of every day, every night. That's all I want to do any more. I don't want to forget anything about you and I'm afraid if I let myself not think about you, I might forget something. I don't want to forget, ever forget. I love you Tia.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Morning Baby Girl. I miss you so. Mama is going to try not to cry cause I have a big favor to ask of you. I took Mama Tippi to the doctor yesterday. It's not good. Like you, she has the enlarged heart with lots of fluid. Dr. Langston said it was worse than yours and her lymph nodes in her neck were swollen the size of a grape. Her back legs have a lot of arthritis and its hard for her to bend down to go tee-tee and hanky. They put her on 4 different pills. She's an old girl so Mama needs you to watch over her with you beautiful angel wings. We know our time with her is limited. We just want her to be as comfortable as possible.

Brother tries so hard to get her to play with him. She won't have any part of it. She barks at him and he thinks that's playing, so he just keeps aggravating her! I know he misses you too.

I pray the time will come when I can feel in my heart that you have forgiven me and I'm so sorry I couldn't save you. My heart aches everyday to hold you. I love you Tia and you will forever be my best baby girl in the world.

Mama

[LtlBtyRam]

Prayers for your whole family.
Angela

[Robert]

I am also praying for you and yours.

[scoora]

Donna,
I'm sorry to hear what the vet said about Miss Tippi. I hope all the meds she is on will be of some help to her. Sending prayers for Miss Tippi and lots of love and hugs for you both.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Thank you all so much. Her cough sure doesn't sound good. She's taking Lasix and peeing up a storm which is what Tia did, so I got out the pull ups and onesies that I used with her and put them on Tippi. OMG! Tia wore them, she didn't like it, but she did keep them on. I've had to fight this old lady and she let me know right quick she was having no part of this! I cried when I got them out again for Tippi, but she did make us laugh a little.
Keep us in your prayers and we will do the same.

Donna

[scoora]

Donna,
You, Miss Tippi and Tia are in my prayers. Please let us know how she is doing.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Sweet Baby Girl, it has been more than two months since you left me. I still can’t speak your name without falling apart.

You loved me without argument, without judgment and like no other did. The depth of my gratitude for your loyalty can’t be encompassed in mere words. I pray that if you felt just one ounce of the love that I had for you, it was enough to fill your heart and you knew that you were a very special and loved little girl.

You taught me the true definition of unconditional love. Despite my mood or time constraints, you loved me without question, hesitation or doubt and you demonstrated it with unending affection. I adored you and loved the fact that you constantly wanted to be near me, following me from room to room, wanting me to hold you at all times. Grandpa Jim always called you “my growth” because I held you on my hip like a baby and you always will be my baby girl.

Love,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Mama just wanted to say that I love you and I miss you sometimes so bad I can hardly function. It's so hard to think about anything except you. I love you Tootie.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Oh my sweet baby girl Tia, if heaven wasn't so far away...

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angel. Mama loves you so much.

Miss Tippi turned 16 yesterday and I cried because you weren't there to help her celebrate or eat pupcakes with her and because we will never get to celebrate your 16th birthday.

I miss you Tootie.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

My sweet precious Tia,

I cannot believe how quickly the last three months have passed us by. August 11, 2013 is a day I'll never forget.

I love you,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

I miss you my sweet angel...

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning baby girl.
It's been a hard couple of days for Mama. I cry at the drop of a hat. I miss you so much. I prayed for God to take away even a little of the pain I'm feeling, but that hasn't happened. Maybe I deserve every bit of it for not being able to save you. I'm so sorry Tia. Please forgive Mama. I love you Tootles.

[Squirt's Mom]

The pain you feel, that we all feel when we lose a baby, isn't present because we did or didn't do something or because we failed them in some way. Instead it is present because of our deep abiding love for them. We have lost our children and there is no pain like that in all the world. It is natural to look back and tell ourselves "if only" but we so often miss the "we did" parts when gazing into the past. Tia was so very loved and well cared for every single day in your care. She knows you "did" more for her than anyone else would have, that you love her like no one else could. She knows you did everything in your power to help her have the longest and best life possible.

Hugs,
Leslie

[gatorgirl_bama]

Merry Christmas baby girl I miss you so much. This was a sad sad day for Mama. Daddy and I stayed home this year. I just couldn't leave you alone. I love you angel...good night.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning baby girl. Mama has had a good cry already.

Miss Tippi is laying here by me and not breathing well. Her cough sounds terrible too. I pray you watch over her and I beg you please let me know if the time comes and I can't see it on my own. I can't bare the thought of losing both of you this close together, or at all of that matter. But I can't stand seeing her like this. Please help Mama. Please give me strength.

Oh my precious baby girl with the face of an angel. Oh how I miss you so.

Love you Tootie.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angel. I miss you so.

[molly muffin]

Sending a warm puppy hug to you Tia and Miss Tippi today. You watch out over your mum, she's having a hard time okay. She'll need to feel your love surrounding her and holding her safe. She's missing you both now and her heart is broken into a million pieces.
puppy huggers tia and tippi
Sharlene (mum of molly muffin)

[gatorgirl_bama]

Yesterday morning when I stopped by to say how much I missed you my sweet Tia, little did I know that this morning you would have your Mama Tippi with you. When you left me Tootles, I knew I could go on because I had Mama Tippi. Both my angels gone in the same year. What will I do without y'all? I love you both with all my heart and only God knows how I will get through this.

I love you girls,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels. It's almost to much to bear to get out of bed in the morning knowing I don't have either one of you to get up to. I miss you both and I pray you are happy, healthy and loving your new home. Please take care of each other until the time comes for Mama to be with y'all again. I love you girls.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning angels. Tucker got here Friday night and visited your graves yesterday. He said Poppy did a good job and he cried. He's in the gifted program at school. We're all very proud of him. He wanted me to sit down and explain why you both were sick. For an 8 year old, he seems to understand.

I miss you both and love you too too much.

Love,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angel babies. It was pretty cold out this morning so mama couldn't stay too long and talk to y'all. Just know I miss you both so very much.
It's been a week since sweet Tippi left us to be with our first angel, Tia. Daddy broke down last night. It was pretty bad. I told him I didn't know how we would survive this. I pray the Good Lord gives us the strength we will need. Tank is taking it hard too. He hasn't eaten, maybe a few bites here and there, in a week. He misses his sisters.
I love you both and I'm so sorry mama couldn't make y'all better. Please forgive me.

Love,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my babies. I'm so lucky to have had the love of two precious angels. Some go a lifetime and never feel an ounce of the love you both gave and I feel sorry for them.

Brother is so sad without his sisters. Y'all didn't play with him much, but he loved you both and misses y'all. He's glad to go to daycare, but just so sad when he comes home. He walks around the house whining and when we go to bed, he jumps up and runs to the end of the bed looking out the door and barks, loudly. He does this several times a night. I told Daddy that we must have a ghost. Are you two playing tricks on brother? lol He really does miss you girls too.

Mama needs to go. I love you girls.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet sweet girls. I just wanted to tell y'all how much I miss y'all. I don't think I could even put into words the ache in my heart.

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning angels (I sound like Charlie on Charlie's Angels)! I miss my girls.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my precious girls. Mama's having a very hard day, already. I'm crying so hard now that I can hardly type. Please look deep into whats left of my heart and see that I miss you both so much and love y'all more than I could ever put into words.

Love,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels. I've been sick the past three days so I cried a lot more. It doesn't seen possible to have so many tears. I knew I would miss you, but I thought I would have some time with at least one of you and not lose you both so soon together. It's almost unbearable at times. Y'all were always there. My big fluffy girls. Now you're both gone and it just doesn't seem fair.

Little Mason goes to the back fence calling for you Tippi. He came in the house yesterday and was calling "Tip Tip" and cried because you didn't come. Tank is too hyper for him, but you were just right! He sure did love you.

I miss you my sweet girls.

Love,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet girls. Brother isn't doing too good. I think he's missing you both so much. He just lays around and doesn't want to eat or play. I'm thinking I better take him to visit Dr. A and Carrie to make sure nothing is wrong, except a broken heart...

[drmvz]

Hello,
Thanks for the comments about Banzais pics. He was beautiful in every way. Just wanted to send some peaceful thoughts your way. Take care, Mike

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet girls. I miss you both with everything in me. Miss Tippi please send some loving light to Brandon. This has been especially hard on him cause he loved you the most. We all knew that and he's not taking this too good. He used to call me everyday, but I'm lucky if he calls once a week. I call, but he can't even talk about you. I made some pretty pictures of you and Tia. I don't know if that will help or make things worse for him. Just look over him for Mama.

I love you both so much.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet girls. It's really cold outside this morning. In the 20's Well, it's what we in Alabama call cold! I wish I had my two little heaters to keep me warm. I always loved y'all laying by me in the bed. Tank does some times, but at 5 pounds, he not that great of a heater! I need my girls. I miss you two.

I love you both so much.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my precious angels. Mama just wanted to say how much I miss y'all. As if y'all wouldn't know that. Little brother is being a pain and acting out. He ate a hole in the carpet. Not just a little hole either. One as big as he is, well he's only 5 pounds, but to us it's a BIG hole. He misses his sisters as much as we do.

I love you both,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my precious babies. Mama is having one of those days. Y'all know, the same day as every day. I get up and cry myself silly because I don't have y'all and I miss y'all so much.

Brother has his moments too. He doesn't understand but he's getting better.

Sending so much love to you both,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels. Well, Brother has taken to Tanzee, but believe me he misses his sisters. Daddy calls her one of your names all the time and Tank starts looking around.

Y'all will always be my girls no matter how many other babies that come into our home.

Love,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels. We get to stay home from work today, snow/ice day, in Alabama! Whoever heard of such!!! We have beach sand not snow. Tank and Tanzee are ready for it though. They're all bundled up in their sweaters.

I miss you girls. Even with these two running around, this house is not the same.

Love,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning angels.

It's very cold this morning. We got to stay home from work again today because of snow and ice. Snow in Alabama! It snowed one time before when y'all were much younger. Y'all were ok with it cause it wasn't a lot! Tank and Tanzee sure hated it and didn't want to go out. Tanzee was scared to death trying to walk on the frozen ground.

Miss my girls really bad...

Love,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning angels.

Another snow/ice day so not work again! It's pretty cold and we have no water... Daddy is freaking. Send some love down to him!

I love y'all and do miss y'all so much that my heart hurts.

Love,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.

Mama gets to go back to work today!! Daddy laughed and said what a tough life I have! He's just mad because people can't live without their phones and internet so he had to work!! A phone man's work is never done...

Mama loves you both and misses y'all so much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet babies. Mama loves y'all and misses y'all so very much. Daddy was talking about you last night Miss Tippi. About what a smart girl you were, knowing when we were hurt or sad and how you would stay right beside us during those times. Even when Tia got sick, you stuck to her like glue. My girls were the best.

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning angels. I hope y'all don't get tired of Mama tell y'all how much I miss y'all. Cause Lord knows my heart is broke in a million pieces from losing you girls. It's crazy how one person can cry so many tears and still have some left for another day. I know there will come a day when I smile instead of crying when I think about my girls. But, that day isn't here yet...

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my little loves. It's not going to be so cold here today. A little rainy but not so cold.

I was giving Tank and Tanzee a treat last night and I told Daddy actually missed not getting my fingers bit off! Then I cried! It seems everything we do reminds us of you two. How could it not? Y'all were our babies for so long.

Mama loves and misses y'all toooo much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels. Mama is missing y'all like crazy lately. Besides trying to keep protective clothing on Tanzee, all I do is think of you two and cry. It's so hard to go through the day and not think of my girls. I love y'all.

Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels. I can't say enough how very sorry I am that I couldn't save either of you. I miss you both so much that I feel like I could die sometimes.

Tanzee has gotten to where she will get up in the middle of the night and come lay beside me just like you did Miss Tippi. I miss that from you. I miss getting up in the morning and Tootles hopping around waiting for her breakfast. I miss everything about you two. It's been almost six months since I held you Tia and it's not getting any easier. I never thought one person could shed so many tears. I feel I've cried a river.

I love you girls and I miss you so much,
Mama

[My sweet Ginger]

Dear Donna, I've cried right alongside with you many, many times while my heart is aching for you for missing your Tia and Tippi unmeasurablly.
I was so happy for you when Tanzee came into your life thinking she will take up a bulk of your time each day from you so you will be left with much less time crying for Tia and Tippi but I guess grief has to take it's own time and nothing can really shorten it. Give yourself and Tanzee more time and I hope in time your grief for Tia & Tippi will get easier for you to handle with the help from the awesome twosome you have right now especially as they grow and develop more of their own adoring personalities which no doubt will be attached to your heart strings stronger each day. You don't know how sorry I'm for your losses. My heart aches every time I read your memorial. I miss them terribly for you, too. Tia and Tippi were unbelievably adorning and cute and I'm so sorry that they left you so soon after each other. Hang in there and take care of yourself and keep writing.:)

[gatorgirl_bama]

Thank you Ginger. She is a blessing as were my precious girls. I'm crying so hard right now I can hardly type. It has been almost 6 months since I lost Tia and 1 1/2 months since Tippi left us.

I was just thinking, I lost my Mom in 2009 and 10 months later, I lost my brother, both to cancer. It seems I'm losing my loves in pairs. I can still here my Mom's voice leaving me phone messages. She always said, "It's it me Donna, call me". My brother always called me collect and for the longest I could listen to my voice mail and hear them both. Sammy deleted them, unintentionally, but oh how I cried.

I have video's of the girls and it breaks my heart to watch them. I miss them with every beat of my heart and as long as there is a breath in me, I will continue to miss them.

Mama loves you girls.

[My sweet Ginger]

Dear Donna,
Tia:) and Tippi:) will be with you forever no matter where you are or who you are with. No one will ever, never take their special places in your broken but loving heart in happiness and in sadness. No one can tell how long and how many tears you will shed missing Tia:) and Tippi:). It could be that you may never be able to stop crying missing Tia:) and Tippi:) and actually it wouldn't surprise me a whole lot if that will be the case.:o
I know one thing for sure and that is what Tia:) and Tippi:) would want for you. Without a doubt that'd be for you to stay strong and enjoy your life with everyone around you who cares and loves you so much who also in return desperately needs your love and care.
I truly believe that is what your angel babies would want for you and for them. I think they are worried and sad about their mommy looking down watching you crumble down and cry so much missing them and not taking care of yourself and not being able to enjoy your precious time with their baby brothers as much as all of you should've. I know you can put big happy smiles on their faces and make them feel very very proud of you by getting back up and live your life to the fullest and be the best mommy to Tank and Tanzee all over again. I know you will get there with time. Just know Tia:) and Tippi:) are always with you every minute of every day giving you wet kisses and tight hugs and know that they are so proud of you and thankful for being such a wonderful mommy.:):):)

[My sweet Ginger]

Oh, I'm sorry Tanzee. What I meant to say was their brother and SISTER.:o

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels. Daddy and I talked about y'all last night. He said he would lose a finger just to be able to get y'all one more treat. We both miss y'all so much and will always love our girls.

Love,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

It's been six long months since I've held you in my arms my precious girl and begged you not to leave Mama. Oh how I wanted to go with you that day because I felt I couldn't live without you. Not a moment of any day goes by that I don't think of you and my heart still hurts as much as if it were that dreadful day. I still cry for you every morning when I go to your grave and again every night before bed. I still feel I let you down and for that I'm truly sorry. I love you Precious La Ta and I miss you more than I ever thought possible. You were and always will be the best baby girl world with the face of an angel.

This is for you both...I thought of you today, but that is nothing new. I thought about you yesterday, and days before that too. I think of you in silence, I often speak your name. All I have are memories and pictures in a frame. Your memory is a keepsake, from which I'll never part. God has you in His arms. I have you in my heart.

I miss you my sweet sweet girls.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning sweet girls.

Daddy was acting kinda funny last night and went to bed very early without talking to us much. When he was heading out to work this morning he stopped and turned around and said I read what you wrote about Tia yesterday. Then he left.

I guess I always think of myself and how heartbroken I am and how much I ache to hold you both. Daddy tries to be the strong one and not show any emotion, but the truth is, his heart broke the day we lost each of you. He goes to your graves and takes such care and makes them all pretty.

I do pray that you both knew how loved you were and still are. Y'all may not be here with us physically, but you will always be in our thoughts and in our hearts.

We miss you our angels.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.
It's been so hard to get through the these last six months. It's been hard on brother too. Last night after we were in the bed he had to get up and walk around the house. Wanting nothing in particular, just walking around in the dark. I wonder does he sense y'all being there some nights. It's strange sometimes how he goes to the end of the bed and looks out the door and just stares or barks and then looks over the edge of the bed at the floor. I so wish I had that gift. Just to be able to feel your presence and know you're with me. I know in my heart y'all are there but to be able to feel you there like he does. Oh what I'd give to have that.

I love you angels.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet Valentine Angels. I got up late this morning, but Mama just wanted to say how much I miss you both and that I love you with all my heart. I'll chat more in the morning.

Love,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my little loves.
Daddy took little brother on a walk this morning to try to cheer him up. Losing you girls was so hard on him. Having Tanzee has helped, but he misses his sisters, which is something she hasn't become yet. Right now she's just a play mate to him.

Daddy has beautiful plans for your graves when it warms up. He loves to plant flowers, so get ready!

I miss you both so much that sometimes I can hardly stand being at home. I closed up under the bed. That was your place Tia and it broke my heart seeing the others go under there. Daddy helped me. We just built a big oak box an slid it under there closing it off.

Mama love y'all and miss y'all way too much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my girls.
Well I finally got brother to eat yesterday. I mean really eat and not pick at it. It's been a while. He's been scratching at your graves and upsetting Daddy. Daddy is so funny about that. He doesn't let anyone go near y'all.

Tanzee is almost out of heat, thank goodness!

Mama loves love y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my little darlings.
Daddy and I talked about y'all a lot yesterday and cried many tears. I even heard him on the phone talking about y'all.

We went to visit Miss Sandra yesterday cause Mr. Gene died. It was sad. Little Maddie misses her daddy. It was the first time Daddy had seen her and he couldn't believe how much she looks liked you Miss Tippi. He really teared up and could hardly look at her, but he held her close for the longest. I know he was wishing it was you. We're gonna pick her up tomorrow morning and let her come stay with Tank and Tanzee for the day. There will be too much commotion going on at her house and she is already upset. Send some love down to her.

Mama misses and love you girl so very much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning Mama's little girls.

Sorry I didn't get to stop in and chat yesterday. I did go to your graves and say good morning. We had Maddie and it broke mine and Daddy's heart. He said she looks like you Tippi, but she has your demeanor Toodles. She played with Brother and chased him around the chair like you did. I cried, so wanted it to be you both there. It's hard bringing another baby into your home and it'll always be your home.

I miss you girls. I miss you so very much and having Maddie here made me miss y'all that much more. Tank and Tanzee are nothing like either of you. They're loving and have their their own little personalities. But, they aren't "my girls". It's so so hard not having y'all.

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.
I love and miss you both so much.

I read this post on facebook yesterday that a lady wrote about losing her little shih tzu about 4 months ago and was still grieving. She said people look at her funny when she cries and say to her "it was just a dog" and "you're still grieving". She wanted to know what was the appropriate time length to grieve because she was having a hard time. I told her about you girls and how I cry every single day and I don't see that stopping any time soon. That y'all were NOT just a dog, y'all were my children and I will grieve for as long as it takes. I needed y'all more than I will ever need any "so called friends".

Gotta get ready for work, but just know, y'all will always be in my heart.

I love y'all.
Mama

[drmvz]

Hi Donna,
I cry everyday too. It will be 3 months this Saturday for Banzai. We must be gentle to ourselves and go down this new road at our own pace. The first sympathy card that I received was from a friend who lost her boston terrier. She wrote "take as long as you need to grieve."

I know Banzai has found your Tia and Tippi. He usually only took a liking to other shihtzus. They are playing beautifully together while they wait for us :)
Take care,
Mike

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels. Mama loves y'all and I miss y'all more every day that passes.

Thank you Dr. Mike. I received one card for each from the our vet and another from Tank's daycare for Tia. None for Tippi. Everyone that knows me, knows the girls were my children and maybe I'm crazy, but I felt insulted. And since its been over six months, they don't like me to talk about them. So I stay to myself these days and spill my heart out here. I know here I'm not judged because I cry or because I still hurt or because I'm angry. And I am all those things. I'm selfish. I didn't want to lose them. And I knew I couldn't be the only one that felt this way.

Have a good day.
Donna

[My sweet Ginger]

Hi Donna,

I read your memorials for your girls almost everyday and very seldom my eyes don't get teary because your genuine sorrow comes right out of the screen still so raw and real which then makes my heart aches for you. I wish there's something that will lessen your heartaches some way. Someone said when we are hurting everything that happens to us seems tinged with hurt and I think that is so true. Just be glad the fact that some people are still thinking about Tia or Tippi or both. Sometimes it's very hard to understand what goes through people's mind and there's nothing we can do about it. Just remember what matters the most to Tia is your everlasting love for her and I'm sure she couldn't care less about other people so much.
Keep coming on here and keep writing and you are so right, you're not the only one who feels this way. :)

[My sweet Ginger]

Oh, I meant Tippi.:o

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet girls.

I've had a good cry already this morning. Thinking about Miss Belinda, Angel Bo's Mom. She posted "The Dance" a few days ago and that's all I think about now. Cause God knows I'd do it all again. As bad as I'm hurting, I'd do it all again because I love you both that much.

I miss my girls...

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet sweet girls.

It's been storming most of the night and this morning. I know how y'all hated storms and I remember sleeping with the lights on so many nights Toodles so you couldn't see the lighting. Even the pill got to where they didn't help you and Miss Tippi. We'd just sit up and ride it out. I didn't mind. It's funny how it doesn't bother Tank and Tanzee at all. Tanzee will go right out in the rain and teetee and I would have to pry you off the porch to get you out!. My girls. Oh how I miss those days.

Mama loves you two.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.
Well the rain is supposed to stop today thank goodness. The ground is soaked and so are Tank and Tan. They don't mind the rain, they just run and play in it. Crazy kids!

You never were one for getting wet. Tippi loved playing out in the rain with Cody, riding the go-cart, in the boat, swimming in the pool. Tippi was the little tomboy! Not my little girl. You were the little diva and wanted to be held all the time. And that, I didn't mind either. I miss you Tootie. I miss you both both so much that my heart hurts. Or what's left of it, cause you and Miss Tippi took most of it with you.

God knows I love Tank. And he has been such a big part in keeping me sane after losing both of y'all and I do love Tanzee. It's just not the same. They aren't y'all. There will never be another y'all. Y'all are y'all and I miss everything about y'all.

I'll love you girl forever.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet girls.

Well, I just found out you have a new friend at the Rainbow Bridge, Sweet Zoe. Please take her by the paw and show her love and tell her to send her Mama and Daddy some healing light cause they are hurting really bad now.

Mama misses y'all really bad too. This isn't an easy thing letting go of our precious little angels. Oh how it hurts to the core of our souls.

I saw a little 2 year old male rescued shih tzu yesterday and did a double take. Miss Tippi I swore it was you. Your twin for sure. I printed a picture for Daddy and was hoping he would want to go to Texas of all places!!! But, he couldn't even look at the picture. It broke my heart seeing it. There are lots that look like you. Not just like you, but somewhat like you. This little fella was identical to you. I never see any that look like my little girl though. You, my little Tia, were unique. One of a kind.

I love you girls.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning sweet girls.
Mama has cried many tears his morning. So many for my sweet girls as I always do and always will, but many for the other on here who have lost their precious angels too. How they must be hurting the way I hurt.

I've also cried may for those that haven't lost their babies, but are going through the same things we went through. Trying so many things to heal, or relieve pain, just to comfort them for as long as they can before their hearts are broken into.

I went to a ladies house yesterday that had five little dogs, all kinds. We were outside talking and both got to crying talking about losing the loves of our lives. How we dearly love the babies we have, and God knows I love Tank and Tanzee, but how we lost a chunk of our hearts the day we lost our real loves. It wasn't strange standing there crying with a stranger. It was like I had known her forever. She said we bonded instantly. We shared stories and memories of each of our babies. She had Boston's and I had "My Tzu's". And oh how I truly miss you both.

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet sweet girls.

Will my river of tears ever stop flowing? Will the day ever come that I can come here and write to you and not cry? Do I want it to? Will that make me forget you? If forgetting will make the tears stop, then I don't want them to.

I was telling Miss Cathy, the stranger lady, about your beautiful brown eyes Miss Tippi. The last time I looked into your eyes, the day you closed them never to open them again. The day I asked God, what had I done. I sent you to be with Tia and I questioned if I had done the right thing. I don't know. I close my own eyes and I can see yours starring back at me with love not knowing that it would be the last time we would ever look at each other again. What did I do?

Mama love you girls and miss you both so much at times that I sometimes wish I were with you. That's how bad the pain in what's left of my heart is.

I love you Tia and Tippi with all my soul. Please tell little Topper that Grandmother loves and misses her so much too. I hope you have found her and Tippi playing with her and is dragging her around by her sock.

[drmvz]

Hi Donna,
tears flow...
It is something I struggle with as well. Separating the grief and love... The two emotions are locked together but they must be separated in order to move on in a healthy way. I am no where near achieving this but being aware is helpful.
The big brown eyes we used to look into...our soul in to theirs.
Best to you,
Mike

[gatorgirl_bama]

Mike, this is so true and God know I'm trying, but not having any luck it seems. I always told Tia she had the face of an angel because she was so beautiful, but Tippi had the most beautiful brown eyes ever. They were like human eyes and when she looked at you it was like she was looking into your soul. They were absolutely beautiful. Guess you can tell I loved my girls!

I know how you must miss Banzai terribly. Being a man, you're supposed to be the strong one and never cry. I catch my husband coming from the girls graves sometimes or just sitting by himself thinking and see that tear in his eye. The ones he doesn't like for me to see. He loved Tippi best and that was ok cause Tia was my heart. Take care...

Good morning my sweet angels.
Mama went back and read your entire thread Tootie. I don't know why, I just did and cried a river, again. Read things I didn't remember writing. Read things I didn't remember reading. Still longing to hold you and Tip and asking God why he took y'all from me.

I know I'm not the only one who has lost their little angel and I not the only one who a shed so many tears because our babies are sick or in pain and can't tell us what's wrong or maybe it has come to the point that there is nothing left that can be done. I pray to God for each and everyone that have been through this or is going through this now that they will find some kind of peace...

I love you girls
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet sweet girls.

Daddy brought another angel home yesterday for your graves. He said he just saw it and knew I would want it for y'all. We went out last night and put it beside you Tootie. He's so gentle while taking care of your graves. I guess this is his release. I told him if he keeps bringing things home, our yard was going to look like the Old Time Pottery shop! He misses y'all so much so whatever he wants to bring home to y'all is perfectly fine with me.

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels. It's been a rough morning for Mama. I'm missing y'all really bad these last few day. I miss y'all everyday, but lately it's been crazy. I can't sleep. I lay there and a thousand things are going through my head at once. I keep reliving those two dreadful days and thinking what I should have done and the things I shouldn't have done. I don't know, it's just crazy. I feel like a horrible Mama and I'm so sorry.

The one thing I do know with out a doubt, is that I love you both and getting to the point of being able to talk about or even think about y'all or look at a picture of y'all without falling apart, well, that's not going to happen any time in the near future.

I miss you my little girls.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

As always Mama is thinking about you two and missing you both so much. Brother is getting better. He still cries to go into the front bedroom and look around. I just let him and when he finishes, he comes out. Maybe he feels your presents stronger in there. He still gets up during the night and looks over the edge of the bed and walks up and down it. Tanzee has done that several times too. I thought they were crazy, but I don't know...

Mama love and miss you both terribly.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning angels.

Today is my first birthday in a very long time without my babies. So, of course I'm crying already. Go find Nanny and Uncle Donnie and Topper and have a big party for Mama.

I love you girls.
Mama

[My sweet Ginger]

Happy, happy birthday, Donna! (In BIG bold rainbow colors if I knew how.:o):):D:):p:D;):cool:
I hope Tanzee and Tank will be extra sweet to you today and have a nice party just the way you want it. I'm sure Tia and Tippi will be there in spirit. :)

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning sweet girls.

Well, my Mardi Gras Fat Tuesday birthday was good. You know the City Hall girls love to party so we had cake, ice cream, fruit and moon pies! Daddy grilled dinner for us when I came home. It was a good day.

Mama love y'all and misses y'all more than I even know how to put into words.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet sweet girls.

It's raining out and Mama is having one of those feel sorry for me mornings already. I hate seeing the rain come cause it makes miss you girls even more. Makes me want to hold you tight Tia for I know how you scared you were of the rain. Tank and Tanzee could care less, they run and play in it. Funny how much different they are than you girls.

I love you Tippi and Tia. Mama misses you both.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning angels.

Well the rain finally stopped, but it's cold now. Tank likes to go out in the cooler weather and he gets frisky just like you did Miss Tippi. I can see you now in the back yard doing your "cool weather dance". It was more hopping like little bunny than a dance, but it was cute and I know you felt good.

Why did you both have to leave Mama? God please help me understand. It was so bad when you left me Toodles, but I still had Mama Tippi to hold and cry to. And I did and she was a comfort. She wasn't you but she let me cry and hold her. Then she left me four months later. It's not fair. That's not how it was supposed to happen. Not both of you together. Please help understand. Daddy was cleaning your graves the other day and said you left us so we would find Tanzee. That she needed saving and that it was you that sent me to her. He said "our girl did that". But I miss you so. I miss Tippi. I miss you both so much that my heart aches to hold you.

Mama loves you girls.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning angels.

Tanzee won't let me sleep in even on the weekends. She got me up at 6:00 a.m. You both would lay there with me even if we just laid there talking. Y'all were my sweethearts and I miss y'all so much.

Love,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.

Mama love y'all and misses you both so much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet sweet girls.

Lulu came over yesterday afternoon and we went to your graves. She said Daddy made them so beautiful. I wish it would warm up so I can put some pretty flowers out. Y'all would like I know. You each have an angel watching over you. Daddy does take such care. It just hurts my heart to go out there, but each morning that is the first thing Mama does. I have to go see y'all even if it is this way. I miss you both so much and wish things were different. Not a day goes by that I ache to hold you both.

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet girls.

It's going to be one of those crying day I can already tell! Send me some love baby girls.

Your brother is becoming unbearable with his whining. I guess it's our fault that we have let him get his way. He whines and cries about everything. He won't eat unless we hand feed him. If he wants a toy, he cries until we get up and get it for him. He won't go out unless we go with him. Daddy said I did this to him!!! It's just that I feel bad for him because he misses you both so much. He still searches and it hurts my heart. Guess y'all better send him some love too! <3

Tanzee reminds me so much of you Tippi. She is so independent and so not a cuddle bug. She's a sweetheart and she has just gotten to where she'll lay in our laps for a while, but she won't lay like a baby you always did Tia. Tank will let me hold him that way some times. I miss that Tootie.

Mama loves you both so much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning Mama's loves.

Oh how I miss you both. Will my tears ever stop or my heart ever mend? Seven months without my Tia. Oh my sweet baby girl I miss you most. I so loved Mama Tippi, but you were my shadow, my best baby girl with that beautiful face of an angel and I miss everything about you. You left me way too soon girl.

I read all the threads about everyone's babies and my heart aches for them too. It's just not fair. Not fair to you that I didn't save you, that I left you that morning, and I just knew in my heart that you would leave me before I could get home to you. I just knew. I didn't get the chance to tell you goodbye. I didn't get to tell you how very much I loved you. You waited until I left to leave me. I'm so sorry I wasn't there with you. I know this heart ache and these tears are my punishment for not being there when you needed me most. I'm truly sorry my angel.

I will always love you girls.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels. Sorry Mama didn't write yesterday. I've been crazy lately.

I keep looking at the rescues, the shelters, everywhere just looking. I see so many babies that need saving, but I keep looking. I thought when I see the right one, I'll feel it. There's just so many Tootie, but they're not you. I guess I'm looking for you, but I'll never find another you. And God knows I loved Miss Tippi with everything in me. She was my first love and I love Tank and Tanzee, but you were my heart and soul. I feel like a horrible person, but I miss you so much and I just want you here. You weren't supposed to leave me. I know you and Tip are at peace and not hurting or suffering anymore and that should ease my mind and my heart. It does somewhat. I guess as I said before, these tears I cry every day and this heartache I feel every moment of every day, is my punishment. And I'll take it...

Mama loves you both, my angels.

[grapey]

Big hugs to you today. Your girls were so lucky to have you.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet girls.

Miss Jen said y'all were lucky to have me, but I was the lucky one. Lucky and blessed to have my girls as long as I did. 29 days old until she was 16 years and 2 months old, I had the best girl in the world, Miss Tippi and from the moment she took her first breath, for 14 years 4 months and 4 days, I had the best baby girl in the world, my Tia. My two angels. They took most of my heart when they left me...

Mama love y'all and misses y'all more everyday.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.

Its going to be a rainy day, but that's good cause Daddy has planted some flowers and trees. He works hard in the yard so y'all will have a pretty site.

I miss my babies so much. I love you girls.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Not a day goes by that I don't think of you two. Not a moment goes by that I don't miss my girls. I do pray that y'all have found sweet little Topper and will keep her close. She was a tiny little thing, blind and hard for her to get around, so please watch over her until it is time for us all to be together again.

Mama loves you girls.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet girls.

What's up with this weather, it has turned cold again. Daddy is trying to plant y'all some pretty flowers and doesn't want them to freeze, but it's warm one week and freezing the next.

Tank and Tanzee are playing together better. He doesn't try to beat her up as much. I guess he's getting used to her being around. I'm glad cause he needed her after losing you both.

Mama loves you both so much and I miss you more everyday.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.

Just wanted to say that I miss y'all so much. I'll always love you two.

Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

I said today is the day I'm going to tell you two how much I love and miss y'all and not cry. I'm getting the teary eyes already, but I'm not going to break down as I do every day. There's not a day that goes by that I don't think of y'all and wish I could hold you in my arms, but y'all know that. Y'all know how much I loved you and my love for you both won't ever go away. I'm trying my hardest to smile when I think of y'all instead of crying. Smile when I look at your pictures.

Like the Wet Willy song goes; Smile on through the rain, Laugh all through the pain, Flow on with the changes, Till the sun comes out again.

That's going to be my new motto. Till the sun comes out again, and we are all together...

I love you girls.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Hey my sweet girls.

Mama's late today, but wanted to tell you both how much I love, with all my heart.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.
It gets harder with each day to go in the back yard and see two little graves out there. Most days I sit in the driveway a while before even coming in the house. It breaks my heart to walk through the door and not be able to hold y'all or get those sweet kisses.

If I had it to do over again, y'all wouldn't be out there at all. You'd be in a beautiful little box like Topper. I guess at the time my sweet Tia I wasn't thinking clearly and when you left us Miss Tippi we couldn't let Tootie be by herself, so out there you went too. I told Daddy that if we ever move, he's gonna have to figure out how to take y'all too. I'm not leaving y'all. That's the bad thing about your pretty little graves...

I love Tia and I'm so sorry I couldn't make you well again. I love you too Mama Tippi and I'm sorry I didn't wait a little longer and maybe you would have gone when you were ready like Tootie. I shouldn't have been the one to make that call, you should have.

I miss you both with every fiber of my being and iit's so hard being here without y'all. I love you girls.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

It's going to rain all day today and your little brother is already getting on my nerves! He's such a whiner now days. He whines about everything.

Tanzee is a sweetheart like you both were. I heard Daddy talking to her yesterday afternoon. He told her she had beautiful eyes just like someone else he used to have and loved a whole lot. You did have the most beautiful brown eyes Mama Tippi. I always said you had human eyes.

I always say how much losing you girls has hurt me and I don't really think about Daddy's feelings, but it broke his heart too. We both miss you girls very much and not a day goes by that we don't think about y'all. Y'all were our lives for over 16 years and it's hard to just go from all to nothing overnight.

I love you girls.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet girl.

I think about my angels everyday and my heart breaks all over again. I long to hold you both in my arms, but just know I will hold you in my heart always.

I love you.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet sweet girls.

Mama loves you both so much and I miss you like crazy. If it weren't for Tank, I'd probably lose what little bit of mind I have left. There's so many times I feel like I just need to be with y'all, but I can't leave brother.

I love you girls.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.

Mama loves you both so very much and I miss y'll terribly.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet little girls.

Yesterday someone was talking about a dog the was just diagnosed with medicated autoimmune anemia (can't remember the exact name). It took every ounce of will power I could muster up to not break down and cry right there. All I could think about was when I first found out you were sick Tootie. How I wanted to take that sickness for you so you would never have to feel pain. I would have taken it all from you and Mama Tippi if possible just to save you both.

I miss you both so much some times I can hardly stand it. I pray y'all knew just how much I loved you and always will.

Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.

Mama is already having a bad day. We're having a thunder storm and that always makes me sad. Sad because I can't comfort you any more or maybe it's that y'all can't comfort me. Either way, I miss you both so much.

Sending kisses to my sweet girls.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.

It's still raining. I laid in bed last night and listened to the rain and thunder and watched the lighting. These are the times that I so wish Daddy hadn't have buried you both in the yard. That I had taken a step back and thought things through and done things differently. I wanted to hold you Tootie and comfort you so badly, but I guess I just cried myself to sleep.

I think I'm going to have Daddy plant a big shade tree in front of y'all. It least it will keep some of the rain off of y'all and possibly would make me feel better about storms!

I love you girls and I miss y'all so much.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

The rain finally stopped yesterday afternoon. It's beautiful out this morning, but a bit chilly. The two brats are out playing.

I miss you girls.

Love,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

It was a beautiful day yesterday. Daddy worked in the yard most of the afternoon making it beautiful for y'all. He does that with so much love and tenderness. I still wish we had not put y'all there, but what is done is done and I'll make the best of it.

I miss you both so much. It's been seven and a half months since I held my littlest angel and three months since Mama Tippi closed those beautiful brown eyes for the last time. Not a day goes by that I don't think of my girls and long to be with you both. My heart breaks again every morning when I get up and go to your graves.

I love you girls.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Today is April Fools Day. I thought about it before going to bed last night and wished I'd wake up in the morning and the past 7 1/2 months had all just been a big horrible April Fools joke and you'd both be laying there beside me when I opened my eyes this morning. Not a joke...my angels are really gone.

Gone, but never forgotten. I can see you both at the bridge, Tippi is playing with Topper and Topper can see now, but my little Tia, you are laying the patiently waiting for Mama. Don't worry my little angel, Mama will be there one day with open arms.

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.

Mama loves and misses y'all so very much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet girls.

I'm finding it hard to type this morning. Already thinking about and dreading Monday, my beautiful little angel's birthday. Girls please give me the strength to get through the next four days...

I love you both so much.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Last night Daddy came in from the back yard all upset. He said there were ants all around your graves and that wasn't going to happen to his girls. So he took are of that situation!

Today Daddy needs some love and healing prayers from y'all. We're heading to the hospital for the trial Spinal Cord Stimulator.

We love and miss you both so much.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet girls.

Daddy is a little better this morning. He's really sore and irritable, but that's expected.

I love and miss you both so much.

Love,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Daddy is very grumpy!! It's nasty weather and you both would hate it going out today. Tanzee and Tank were running and playing this morning and she's hurt her leg. They play so hard in the back yard. I guess he's making up for y'all not playing/running with him!

I miss you girls.

Love,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet girls.

Today is bitter sweet for me Tootles, it's your 15th birthday. I dreaded this day getting here for I knew how much more it would make me miss you. I pray you have a wonderful birthday in heaven. I love you Tia.

Miss Tippi gave me four more beautiful little girls this day 15 years ago and I treasured each one. Happy birthday Tia, Maggie, Sweet Pea, Domino and Tickles. Have a wonderful 1st birthday in heaven all together again with Mama Tippi. It is a strange thing that Mama Tippi was the first to get here and she was the last to leave.

Love,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Yesterday was a hard day for Mama. I hope your liked your birthday balloons my little angel. I'm sorry that that is all Mama did for your day. Daddy has been so grumpy lately because of his back procedure. He thought I was crazy when I came home yesterday and went out to your graves until he saw the balloons. He said he's never seen anyone that remembers dates like I do. How could I forget your birthday? I birthed all five of you right a long with Mama Tippi. It was a hard delivery for her. Five beautiful little girls. But you my little love, you captured my heart right from the start. And for over fourteen you were the one.

I miss you both more than you will ever know and I will always love my girls.

Love,
Mama

[addy]

Happy Birthday Angels. I know Mama had a hard day yesterday but she wanted you to have a special day.

so many hugs, Donna.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

It's been a rough few days for Mama. I miss you both so much and all these holidays are killing me! Pa called me on your birthday Tootie. He said you lived a good long life and that now you were with Nanny. Yesterday would have been their 58th anniversary. He's still so sad after almost 5 years. I try not to cry when I talk to him. I don't know how not to. It seems that pretty much every month has some sort of sadness to it...April 7th is your birthday and the 8th Mama & Daddy's anniversary and the 16th MawMaw died, May 1st Uncle Donnie died and May 30th is his birthday, June 24th is Nanny's birthday and June 28th she died, July 9th Topper died, Aug 1st is MawMaw's birthday, Aug 11th (will be the hardest day for me) will be one year since you left me, Oct 25th is Topper's birthday, 31st is Miss Tippi's birthday, December 30th (another really hard day) Miss Tippi will be gone for one year. November is the month of "Thanksgiving", but it'll be just another sad month because y'all are gone from me.

I'm rambling, but just know I love you both more than life itself and I miss y'all so much.

Love,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet girls.

Sorry nothing is posted the last couple of days. I used the ipad and for some reason there is nothing here, so I'm back to the trusty laptop.

Daddy went Thursday and had the temp scs taken out. The last week has been a good one for him as the procedure seemed to work wonders. We go back next Thursday for the permanent implant.

He put some pretty white rocks on your graves. They look beautiful. I still wish that we had not put y'all when we did, but I can't move y'all now. Tank spends time there. He seems to know, and that sounds funny and strange at the same time, that y'all are there. Tanzee visits too. She only knew Mama Tippi for a short time and never you Tia, but she will walk around the graves like she is inspecting them, making sure they are just right. Daddy said he wanted y'all in the middle of the yard because y'all owned it and that's where y'all should be, not tucked away in the corner.

Anyway, I miss you girls. I do hope you both knew how much Mama loved you.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.

Looks like it's going to be a rainy day today. Makes me sad to see the rain come, I know how you both hated it. I thought about building a pergola over y'all. It would be pretty and keep some rain away. Maybe make me feel better about it anyway!

It's been eight months my littlest angel. It feels like a million years since I've held you and Mama Tippi, but I can still remember your smell. Sweet strawberries. I can close my eyes and remember and it seems like you both should be right beside me. Oh how I miss you girls. Daddy walked by the bed last night and said to me that Tank and Tanzee are beautiful, but they will never ever be as beautiful as our "girls". Made me smile...

I love you and miss you so much.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Mama loves and misses y'all so much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet girls.

It's raining cats and dogs out this morning and blowing really bad. I wish I could cover you up Tootie. Some how Mama will find a way. The rocks that Daddy put out look so pretty and will keep the water from puddling on y'all. I think I'll get a weeping willow and plant in front of y'all. That will be beautiful when it's fully grown.

I do miss you both so much. It's still so hard to come home and you not be there jumping on me trying to get me to pick you up first. Then Mama Tippi just laying there sleeping and not hearing a thing! Oh my littlest girl how I long to hold you. Tanzee came to the side of my recliner and put her feet on the arm just like you did and when I said "get down", I cried thinking how you would just like at me with those beautiful eyes and stay right there until I said it again. Oh God I miss mis girls so...

Love,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my beautiful angels.

It's cold out this morning so the two little ones didn't want to go out. In this weather, you and Miss Tippi would get so frisky! I can see y'all now hopping around the yard like bunnies. Makes me smile and cry at the same time.

I love you girls and miss you both more than I could ever put into words.

Love,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

We'll be going to the hospital in a bit. Watch over Daddy this morning during his surgery.

Mama loves and misses you both.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my beautiful angels.

It's been raining all night and the two little ones had to go out in it this morning. Tanzee reminds me so much of you Tia, she hates to get wet too! Tank is just like you Miss Tippi, he will run and play in it!

Daddy's surgery went great yesterday except for the muscle spasms again. He's really sore this morning (and grumpy!!).

I miss you girls so much.

Love,
Mama

[Iraklis]

Dedicated (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P3s11acb7Z8)


Lyrics (http://www.sing365.com/music/lyric.nsf/Bittersweet-lyrics-Within-Temptation/B99CFD446B65E3AA48256D7500303ABF)

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

The rain has finally stopped and your graves are drying up. I hate it when it rain so hard that the yard floods. Breaks my heart to see so much water there and knowing how you hated it Tootie.

Iraklis posted a video of a movie I have watched many times and cry every time I watch it like it was the first. Like Hachiko, you and Tippi were loyal companions. I don't think there will ever be another as faithful as you two were. I do miss you both so much that my heart hurts to think about y'all. Just know that I wouldn't want it any other way.

I love you girls.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning and Happy Easter my beautiful angels.

Daddy put Easter eggs on your graves this morning. He wrote y'all a sweet little message on each. The two babies walked around sniffing the eggs and Daddy had to run them off!

I love you girls so much. Give everyone a big hug and kiss for me and tell them all I miss them so. I know Granny is all dressed up and ready for Church service! She loved her pretty dresses. Give her a special kiss for me.

I miss y'all.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

The weather was so nice yesterday and supposed to be today also. You both would have loved it. Tank and Tanzee played so hard yesterday afternoon that Tank slept until 4:30 this morning!

I love and miss you both.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my beautiful angels.

Daddy is having bad muscle spasms from the surgery, please send some healing love to him. Tank doesn't act like he's feeling well either. I'm going to make an appointment to bring him to the vet. I can't stand the thought of losing another baby.

The weather is so beautiful. Cool in the mornings like Tippi liked it, but the dew on the ground is something you wouldn't like!

My heart breaks to hold you both. I miss y'all so much my angels.

Until tomorrow, sending my love.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

The weather has been beautiful for the past few days and makes me miss you both so much. It's been almost four months since Mama Tippi went to be with you Tia. This has been the hardest 8 1/2 months of my life. I think sometimes, Lord just left me have a "do over". All the things I would have done differently. A lot of things I would have done differently. Some how, some way I would have made you both well again. A do over, that's what I would ask for...

I miss my babies.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my beautiful angels.

I laid in bed last night and thought of you two, which there's nothing different about that. I thought of how I would walk in the front door and you'd jump on me until I picked you up and held you like a baby or put you on my hip. That's what we did everyday when I came home. Then we'd step over Mama Tippi while she was sleeping cause she wouldn't hear me come in. I've held you from the time you were born just like that until you left me. I miss that. I miss holding you and you just laying there so sweet and innocent. You were my baby girl.

I DO MISS YOU BOTH SO MUCH THAT MY HEART HURTS TO THINK ABOUT YOU...

Love,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Mama loves you so much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Yesterday was a busy day. Took Tucker home. We stopped at ihop then went to the Gulf Breeze Zoo. He had a good time. I got home a little after 9:00 and was very tired.

Tuck talked about you girls. He misses y'all too. But there is no one in the world that misses y'all more than I do. No way possible. My heart hurts so bad...

Love,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my beautiful angels.

Mama is having a bad morning. It's storming and I hate it because I think of how you, my sweet Tia, hated the thunder and lighting. How I would love to have you laying on my head now, holding you in my arms until it was all over. How I miss my girls so much that my heart hurts. How my arms ache to hold you both. How could I lose you and go on without you. How it feels as though I can't some times.

I miss you my sweet beautiful girls. I miss everything about you.

Love,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.

The site is going in and out again today cause this is about the seventh time I've tried to write to y'all. Just wanted to say how much I love you both to the core of my soul and I miss you so much.

Love,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

The rain started again last night. The yard was still wet from the other storm, so I'm praying this is a mini! I keep a watch on your graves as I certainly can't let anything happen to y'all.

Mama loves and misses you girls so much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning angels.

It is a beautiful morning and Miss Tippi you would love it, the frisky morning air. In my mind I can see you out there hopping around and it makes my smile and cry at the same time. And Tootie, I'd have to push you off the porch cause the ground is a little wet! God, I miss you girls. My girls...

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

For some reason I'm missing you both more than usual this morning. I do miss y'all everyday, but I can't stop crying now. Please send some loving to me, I need to feel your love today.

Love my girls,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Tanzee is going in to be spayed this morning. Send little sister some healing love.

Mama loves and misses you both so much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Tanzee made it through her spaying. Daddy said he doesn't remember you girl being this sore and groggy! I do though. Tia was fine three days, but Tippi, you milked it for all it was worth. We'd laugh when we would walk out of the room and you'd start whining until we came back, then you'd stop. You'd stop at the end of the stairs and just stand there waiting for someone to pick you up and carry you up. I caught on, after 2 weeks of it!

Y'all were perfect though and we loved you two more than anything. Daddy said this morning that these two are spoiled pups, but y'all were like the kids, only better!

Mama loves you both.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning angels.

Tanzee is back to her old self again. Thank y'all for sending some love as I know that's why she's feeling better.

My two angels...how I miss you girls more than I know how to put into words. Just saying that I miss you or I love you is a mere smigging of how I really feel. I walk by your pictures and I can't even look at you for fear of breaking down. Just the mention of your names and I fall to pieces. I'd move heaven and earth just for one more day with you both.

Mama loves you girls.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Tanzee is so much better and Daddy has been in a much better mood the last couple of days. I'd like to be able to say that about me, but I don't have my girls. And there's nothing good about that. It's beautiful out this morning, but my heart breaks all over again when I go to your graves. No matter how beautiful Daddy keeps them, my heart hurts.

This will be my first Mother's Day without y'all. Daddy always put your names on my cards and it will be strange not to see it there. I miss you both so much.

Love my girls,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.

Your brother is having some problems. When has been crying out when we pick him up sometimes. He threw up this morning. I'm going to make an appointment for him and get him checked out. I can't bear the thought of him being sick or hurt, he's such a little fella. Please send some loving to him.

Mama loves and misses you both so much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Brother is much better after seeing the vet yesterday morning. They said he must have eaten something in the yard. Couldn't find anything it could have been though. I'll have to keep a better watch on him.

Thank you both for the love y'all sent to him. Even if y'all didn't like him at first, he grew on y'all!!! He's a good little boy.

Mama loves y'all and misses y'all so much. My sweet girls.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.

I miss you both more with every breath I take and my heart aches to hold y'all. I pray y'all knew how much I loved y'all and still I love you more everyday.

It's going to be a rainy day. I think I'll run up to Lowe's and get y'all some pretty flowers and plant them before the rain sets in. Maybe this will make me feel better.

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY Miss Tippi.

Mama loves my girls.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning angels.

Mama had a good day yesterday. Planted some plants in the yard and just piddled around. We bought the kids some new toys and Tank tried to take them all, as usual.

Yesterday was nine months since you left me Tia. I tried not to think about it, but that's so hard not to do. I asked Daddy not to get me anything, especially a card. We always signed your and Mama Tippi's names to every thing and I couldn't bear to read the card and it not have your names there. It's just not right. I miss y'all so much.

My precious angels, Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Mama loves you both so much and miss you just as much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

There's a new angel named Java that came to the bridge yesterday. Take her under your beautiful wings and show her some love. I know she'll miss her Mom and Dad as much as y'all missed us. Take care of her.

My sweet beautiful girls, I miss you both so much.

Love,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.

It stormed yesterday and made me think of my sweet Tootie. I so wish I could hold you through it my little angel. I know Uncle Donnie was there for me. He always loved you girls.
Fifteen days ago was the day he died and fifteen day from now is his birthday. Help him celebrate and tell him your Mama loves and misses him too.

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.

Mama loves y'all too too much and miss y'all even more.

I heard the Diamond Rio song the other day and I cried for y'all...

One more day
One more time
One more sunset, maybe I'd be satisfied
But then again
I know what it would do
Leave me wishing still, for one more day with you
Leave me wishing still, for one more day with you

I love you girls.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

It looks like it going to be a beautiful day out. Maybe Daddy and I can plant some pretty flowers for y'all. I found a picture of how I'd like your spot to look. I think you both will be pleased. I looked at some stones to put your names on too.

Daddy is trying to kill the stickers in the backyard. He can't spray them because of the babies, so he's weed eating little sport. Those things hurt!

Mama loves you both so much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.

It's another beautiful day. We didn't plant any flowers yesterday, but are going to today. I love you girls and miss you so much.

Love,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.

Daddy planted y'all a beautiful camellia japonica. He read up on them and said it's also called the rose of winter. He's hoping y'all will have beautiful flowers even in the cold weather. And he liked that it's the official state flower of Alabama. He called me out to look at it and said when he planted it this one limb was pointing towards y'all and branched out like it was already trying to shade you both. He takes care of y'all, but it broke my heart to stand out there.

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.

I went out to your spot this morning, as I do every morning, and again my heart hurt. I miss you both as much today as I did the day y'all left me. Will the day come that I can come to your spot and I don't feel so much pain? Will the hurt ever go away?

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Mama loves you both so very much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

It was a very hot day yesterday. Took the kids to daycare because Tank has been so restless lately. That usually helps him sleep, but he was up and down most of the night as usual. Guess y'all need to send some love to him.

Mama loves and misses y'all so much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

You have some work to do. There's a new Cush angel that y'all need to help. I don't know her name, but her Mama is Miss Becky. Find her and show her the ropes and ask her to send some love to her Mama, cause she is hurting and very sad.

Mama loves y'all very much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.

I just messaged Miss Becky again and am crying for her and her Roxi. I'm also crying for my babies. I so miss my sweet girls.

Love,
Mama

[Angelique (Maya's Mommy)]

Dear Sweet Donna
You have the heart of an Angel. The depth of your grief for your beloved babies has touched my soul in a way I will not forget. My tears today are for you and no other. I wish I could find words that would perhaps give you some comfort but I am at a loss to express them. My heart breaks for you. It is hard to be one of the sensitive ones. The ones that most of the world fails to understand or are uncomfortable with such intensity of emotion. To me, the sensitive ones are the most precious of souls. To the degree that we are able to grieve is the degree to which we are able to love. Without love there is nothing. I hope you don't mind that I posted on your beautiful memorial. I wish for you moments of peace. Blessings to you.

~Angelique (Maya's Mommy)

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

We got a very sweet note from Miss Angelique and we must send her and Maya some love and healing prayers cause Maya is a new Cush pup.

It's so beautiful out this morning. I think we'll take the babies to the beach and let them play. I remember taking you two. Tippi loved the water, but you Tootles, hated it. Even boat riding it was the same way! My beautiful girls, how I miss you.

Much love and tears,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

We just worked in the yard yesterday. Daddy took me to look at the little beach we used to take you girls. I think we'll go there to day to celebrate Memorial Day.

Mama loves you girls.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.

My heart hurts this morning and the tears flow as I long to hold you both. My sweet sweet girls, Mama misses y'all so.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Please send some love to Daisy and her Mama. She has been really sick lately.

Mama loves and misses y'all so very much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.

It rained last night and I saw a little lightening. It hurt my heart as usual, but was glad you didn't have to go through it my sweet Tia. Nothing bothers these babies. They are so different from you both.

Mama loves and miss you so much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning angels.

Yesterday morning I couldn't get on the site so I didn't get to write to y'all. It was Uncle Donnie's birthday. I hope y'all had a good celebration with him. Give him a big kiss for me and make sure he knows I love him and miss him so much.

It's been raining the last couple of days. We sure needed it. Our yard was so dry. Daddy is out doing yard work and the babies keep barking when they hear him.

I'm going to get some pretty plants today and put out by y'all. I miss y'all so much I can't hardly stand it.

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.

Just wanted to say I miss you both so much.

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

I need y'all to send some love and healing light to little Daisy Mae. She isn't doing so good and her Mama, Miss Valerie, is in need too.

Y'all were and will always be the light of my life. I miss you both so much.

Love,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.

It's been raining since yesterday. These crazy babies aren't scared, but they won't go out this morning.

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.

The rain has finally stopped. I don't know for how long, but for now it has stopped. I know we need it, but it makes me sad. It makes me miss you so much more than I already do.

Daddy is going to bring me some big white rocks to put around your spot. I have some pretty ideas of how I want it to look. I've got to order you each a stone with your name. I've been looking around at different ones. It will be so nice. I think y'all would approve!

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

This morning has started out to be a tough one for Mama. I'm missing y'all really bad and my heart is aching more than usual. If only I could turn back the hands of time, I would. There's so much that I would do differently. So much more love I'd get to y'all.

I love you girls.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

It's going to be a hot day today, at least not raining though. Your brother is to be a whinny brat! He cries to get his way about every thing. I guess it's my fault cause I baby him. That's what Daddy says anyway!

Mama loves and miss y'all so much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my beautiful angels.

It's going to be a beautiful day out today. I think I'll just piddle out in the yard for a while.

Mama loves and misses y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels,

Daddy went to pick up his new boat this morning. We laughed last night about you Tippi. You loved riding in the boat, with your bright yellow life vest on and Tia with her pretty pink one, hatted it. My girls...oh how I miss everything about you two.

Mama loves you both so much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Y'all have work to do today. We have a new angels, a pretty little doxie girl named Daisy Mae. Take her under your beautiful wings and show her the ropes. And send some love down to her Mama, Miss Valerie, cause her heart is hurting so bad now.

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Mama is having a hard day already. Feeling Miss Valerie's pain, the pain of losing you both. It's so hard to understand.

I love you girls.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet sweet angels.

It stormed all night and made me sad for you Tootie and made me think of sweet Tipper. She hates those storms as much as you did. As usual it didn't bother the babies at all. I'm thankful for that. I guess you must be sending some love to them on these bad days. You are an angel and I love you. I love both of my girls.

Mama misses y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels,

Mama was running late yesterday so I didn't get to stop in. It's raining and storming again. Tanzee slept through it all and went out to take care of her business and it didn't bother her at all. Brother barks at the thunder! He's crazy like that. I guess he's telling it to stop cause he knows y'all hated it.

Mama loves and misses y'all so much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning angels.

It's a beautiful day. I fell at work yesterday and hurt my ankle and knee on my knee replacement leg. It's really sore and I can hardly walk on it so I won't get to plant any flowers this weekend. I'll get something special next weekend for y'all.

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Mama is still so sore. We didn't do much yesterday. I took Daddy to eat Chinese and he loved it. He got a new boat and worked on that yesterday, getting everything he'll need ready. I told him to get your life jackets out for the babies. I know it'll break me heart when I see them wearing them, but I'm gonna try not to cry.

I miss you girls so much.

Love,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.

Mama loves and misses y'all so much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my beautiful angels.

Just missing you both so much and I had a good cry last night (and this morning). Y'all are always on my mind and always in my heart.

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning angels.

It sure was hot and humid yesterday. I guess it's going to be that way all summer. Daddy is getting the boat ready to take out this weekend. It's been a while since we've been on the water. Just something else that makes me think of my girls...

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

I went out in the back yard yesterday to your graves, something I don't like to do. Most times I sit on the porch and talk to y'all, but I just felt the need to go to y'all. It breaks my heart. Daddy has your graves looking so beautiful, but it still breaks my heart. It's been almost 6 months since Mama Tippi left and almost 11 months for you Tia. It doesn't seem possible that I've been without my girls that long. I miss y'all so much.

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning Angels.

Daddy has the boat out and ready to go. I'm in tears already and haven't gotten on it yet. But I'm going to think happy thoughts today. I'm going to imagine Miss Tippi with her ears flying in the wind, loving it and having a grand time. You you my sweet Tia, are holding on to Mama for dear life. Something I didn't mind at all.

I love and miss you both with all my heart.
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Daddy and I had a nice ride in the boat yesterday. We're going to get your life vest out for the babies and take them for a ride next weekend.

Mama loves and misses y'all so much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

It was a nice weekend, but today it's supposed to start raining again. Daddy and I cleaned the house yesterday. Cody, Kathleen and Addison will be here Wednesday and as always he goes into a cleaning frenzy when company is coming. They're bring Ty and I'm wondering how Tank is going to react to that. He's very territorial, so this should be NOT so much fun! Send some calming love to your brother, he's going to need it.

Mama loves and misses my girls so much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.

Mama is running late this morning, but wanted to say that I love you girls and miss y'all so much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

It started thundering last night and was raining when I got up this morning. Both babies had to go out in it, but they didn't seem to mind! That I'm thankful for.

Mama love and misses y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.

It's still raining and I'm tired of it! Cody, Kathleen and Addison get here around 9:30. Tank DOES NOT like Ty! This should be a trying week! Send some extra love to your brother.

Mama loves you girls.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Tank is a bully! Ty has destroyed all the little ones toys. Lord help us the week!

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning angels.

The crazy neighbors were at it again last night with the loud fire works. Tanzee was out doing her final business and they set one off. Tanzee flew across the back yard and then flew back and almost knocked me down trying to get in the door. Then we got a thunder storm. She was shaking just like you did Tootles. It was sad. Send some calming love to your brother and sister and to Tipper. They all need it.

Mama loves and misses y'all so much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

It's sad to say, but because of the last 3-4 nights, I'm glad y'all weren't here. The crazy neighbor has brought out the commercial grade fire works and that would have drove you both into a frenzy. Tanzee is so scared, she wouldn't go out without being forced to. She is scared to death now. Send her some loving please.

Mama loves you girls.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

No fire works last night. Tanzee has calmed down some. She still doesn't want to go out by herself, but she's so much better.

Mama loves and miss y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.

Things have calmed down since there have been no fire works for a couple of days. Everyone should be leaving today and things will get back to normal. The babies aren't used to having Addison and Gunner here this long and together!!!

Send some more loving to us. Mama misses y'all so much.

[paulawhitcomb]

Indeed, I read your post and it touches my heart. I feel how much you love her and also how much you miss her. I know what feeling do you have and you need to be strong.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

All the kids left yesterday so it's just me and Daddy and the babies. I'm off work the rest of the week which is good because I've got to clean the house and wash all the bed clothes.

Katelyn asked me yesterday if Tank missed y'all or even knew y'all were gone. I cried and told her of course he did. He searched for you for months and cried while looking for you. He loved his sisters.

Mama misses y'all so much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning angels.

It's hot and muggy out today. The babies didn't want to stay out long. The crazy neighbor set off just one cannon last night. Tan Tan didn't like it. I guess he was just showing Daddy that he's still here. He's such a jackass!!

Mama loves and misses y'all so much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Happy July 4th my angels.

The crazy neighbor set off the fire works again last night and sent Tanzee into a frenzy. I thought of you Tia and cried. It was just like having you in my arms all over again. She was up and down and panting, just couldn't get away from the noise. I turned the ac unit and tv up and all the fans and the window ac on and tried to drown him out. She finally settled down in the bed room chair. I left her there for a while and then Daddy put her in the bed and she slept.

We're going to take them away from the house tonight. Hope he finishes up early and doesn't start them up again tomorrow night. Daddy is livid.

Send us some loving. Mama loves you girls.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Fire works were crazy last night and Tanzee was beside herself. She wouldn't sleep in the bed, just the chair. I cried trying to hold her. I thought of you Tootie and how scared you were of loud sounds. I pray these fire works don't make her afraid of thunders storms too. She hasn't been, but who knows now.

Mama loves y'all so much and miss you both terribly.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

We're getting ready to go out in the boat. The crazy neighbor was at it again. Tanzee slept in the chair part of the night. I did get her into bed and she slept by me and is still sleeping now. Send her some loving, and Daddy too!

Mama loves my girls.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

No fire works last night! Tanzee did get a little nervous last night, but she settled in bed finally and went to sleep. I wonder if she is associating the fire works with bed time? Makes sense to me. We'll have to work on that.

Mama loves and misses my girls.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my precious angels.

It's hot and humid around here. The babies don't want to stay outside very long. Should cool down at bit by the end of the week cause it's going to rain. No fire works, but again last night Tanzee went into a frenzy when we started to bed. Send her some loving please.

Mama misses you girls. I love y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Just wanted to say how much I miss you both.

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.

Well it's supposed to start raining today. We sure need some rain, no thunder please, just rain!

Send some loving to Ms. Patti and Tipper.

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Mama's heart is hurting this morning more than usual. It's been eleven months since I held you in my arms my sweet Tia. Eleven months ago you left me...Mama loves you girls and I miss y'all so much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

It's been a few days since Mama wrote to y'all. Don't ever think I've forgotten y'all cause I never could. I've been sick, down with the muscle spasms. I've still got them, but wanted to say how much I love ya'll.

Mama misses y'all.

[molly muffin]

Awww, Donna sorry to hear that you've been down and out for a bit.

hugs
Sharlene and molly muffin

[gatorgirl_bama]

Thanks Sharlene. It's not often that I get them, but when I do, it's like I'm being twisted like a dish cloth. Something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. It's also embarrassing and humiliating because they're so bad that I can't bathe myself and worse yet, go to the bathroom by myself. So, I try to eat and drink as little as possible until they're gone!

I did walk to the girls' graves this morning. I do miss them so much.

[molly muffin]

Awww Donna, big hugs. I know you miss the girls something awful. They were your babies, so it is only natural.

I do sympathize. I had very bad back spasm after a diving accident in my youth. Still get them sometimes. Hope yours are gone now and you're feeling better.

hugs
Sharlene

[gatorgirl_bama]

No more spasms, just very sore. But I'll get through this too!

My Tippi was the smartest thing ever. She would always lay with me if I was crying and lick away the tears. Tia, of course would never leave my side, but Miss Tippi's job was to make you feel better. Tank is such a little sweetheart and God knows I love him dearly. He seems to know when I'm feeling sad and will lay his little head on my chest and snuggle with me, but it only takes the pain away for a moment. I miss them so...my girls.

[molly muffin]

That is so sweet that Tank tries to comfort you. Nothing will ever be like it was with your girls, they were unique.
Tank and Tanzee have their own way of trying to be a comfort I am sure.

hugs
Sharlene and molly muffin

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

It's been so nice and cool the past couple of mornings. Oh Miss Tippi you would have loved it. It's your frisky weather! I went to your graves this morning and talked to you both. I try to stay out of the back yard cause it hurts my heart and Daddy hates to see me cry for y'all. So mostly I come here to talk to y'all after he leaves for work. Then I can cry all I need to. It's been almost a year my precious Tia, but my heart feels as though I've just lost you. I miss you both so very much.

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning angels.

It's a nasty rainy day. Started raining yesterday and hasn't stopped, but our yard needed it. The flowers are looking so pretty. Daddy worries about your spot so much. It has to be perfect. He talks about y'all and I cry, that's all I can do. It's so hard to even speak your names. I do miss you both so much.

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Today looks like a much better day, but I don't know how long that'll last! Crazy Tanzee got into an ant bed yesterday morning. I threw her into the bath and started washing and picking them off and a few got me too. I gave her some Benadryl just in case. Bless her young little heart, she's a digger and I have to watch her every minute in the yard. Daddy has to do something about the ants.

Don't know what we'll be doing today, probably go grocery shopping since I didn't get out at all last weekend or yesterday.

Mama loves and misses y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my precious angels.

The nice weather didn't last. Daddy and I went to Old 27 Grill and had lunch and I did get some grocery shopping done. Then Daddy got to feeling bad so we came on home and laid around the rest of the day. It rained on and off last yesterday afternoon and just a drizzle this morning. Tia my love, you would not go near the back yard. The lawn mover broke last week and Daddy hasn't cut the grass, so it's holding lots of water. I can see you now digging your little toes into the back porch not wanting to get your paws wet. Oh how you hated wet paws. I smile and cry at the same time. At least I can smile about you and Tippi now...even through the tears.

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning sweet angels.

It's going to be another nasty rainy day. This weather depresses me even more than I already am. I miss you both terribly.

Mama loves you.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Daddy finally cut the grass yesterday afternoon and the babies thank him! I went to your graves yesterday when I got home and pulled some weeds. Of course I cried with every weed. It took everything I had in me to finish up. It looks so much better now. I've been thinking that I need to spend more time out there than here. This has been good therapy, keeping my almost year long journal, but I think it's about time to call it a day.

Mama loves and kisses you both.

[molly muffin]

Donna, just sending you hugs.

Sharlene and molly muffin

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels,

Thank you Sharlene.

It's hot and muggy out there is morning, but your places look pretty. The babies like to walk around y'all and check things out. For the longest I wouldn't let them near y'all, but now I do. They just walk around and look, like they are the grounds keepers. When everything looks good, they leave. I wonder do they feel y'all there? A few times Tank has just laid there looking. Breaks my heart.

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

It rained again yesterday. Daddy is going into mass depression of this bad weather! He said it's killing him at work. You know a phone man's work is never done!!

Brother is being whiny these days. I just don't know what to do for him sometimes. I know he still misses y'all so much, as do I. It's been a very hard year for us all. Please send him some loving.

Mama loves and misses my girls.

[labblab]

Dear Donna, I think your journal has always been such a sweet and dear tribute to the love you will forever share with your girls. We are privileged to stand here by your side each morning, quietly reading your words and hoping you feel our support.

So often, my weather here in Atlanta is the same as yours. So on the sunny mornings I smile along with you, and on the rainy mornings my spirits sink a bit, too. I just want you to know you will never be alone on your journey, even if and when your journal entries slow or cease. To everything there is a time and a season.

Except for one thing. What won't ever change is that you and the girls are part of our family. And we will always be here to help any way we can.

Love, Marianne

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angel.

Send Ms. Marianne some love for Mama. This forum never ceases to amaze me. I log on in the morning, read all the posts, talk to you girls, cry so many tears and say my prayers. Not just for me, but for all the others that don't have their babies anymore. And I cry for those that still do because they read what we're going through and how we're feeling and that one day it'll be them. This hurt, I wouldn't wish it on anyone.

Just yesterday morning I said how brother goes to your graves and visits y'all. I hadn't said anything to anyone else about that, well last night Daddy told me that he noticed every time Tank goes in the back yard, he goes straight to the girls graves and walk in between them. I just listened to him. Then he told me about little Tzu he saw that looked just like Tippi. He told the lady about y'all and she told him to bring me out to see this puppy. He told her no thank you, "she'll cry". Send Daddy some loving too...

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

It's beautiful out today. Daddy is getting the boat ready so we can take the babies for a river ride.

Mama loves and misses you both so much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.

Well the babies did go out on the boat with us and what a time the had. They enjoyed the ride and when we stopped at the sandbar, Tank had the best time swimming. Tanzee on the other hand was terrified and I have the scratches to prove it. No water for her! I have pictures (taken with Daddy's little phone cause I forgot mine) and will post them if I can!

Tanzee got up sick on her tummy this morning and I had to give her some Pepto. I better go check on her.

Mama loves you girls.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

It's supposed to storm today. Watch over the babies and send Tanzee some love if it does cause she's getting just like you Tootie.

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Didn't rain at all yesterday and it's so nice and cool out this morning that little brother wanted to stay outside! I love this weather.

Mama loves and misses you both.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Another cool morning, but it does turn so hot in the afternoons. Send some loving to your brother as he wasn't feeling well yesterday and this morning.

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Hot morning and brother is still not his usual self.

Mama loves and misses you both.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my angels.

Brother seems to be feeling a bit better. I guess like us, he has his bad days too. Tanzee never has a bad day. Bless her heart, she's just so happy to be loved. She's not a cuddle bug like you Tia or your brother. She prefers to just be there like Mama Tippi. Strange little personalities.

Daddy is getting the boat ready. He and Jamie are going fishing. We're just going to stay around the house today.

Mama loves y'all and I miss y'all so much. Some days are worse than others...

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Could y'all send Tipper some healing love. Her gallbladder is giving her fits. Heck, send us all some, we could use it. My precious girls.

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Please find sweet Frankie the boxer and show him the ropes and send his Mama, Ms. Celeste some loving. She's hurting and needs it now.

Mama loves you both so much.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

There was a lot of thundering last night. Tanzee jumped a few times, but I didn't say anything and she calmed herself down. It's raining this morning and she's ok with that. It hurts my heart with I hear thunder, for you my precious angel and now for her as she hates it as much as you did. Send her some loving for Mama.

I love you both with all my heart and I miss y'all even more.

Love,
Mama

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Please tell Frankie to send his Mama some love, she is hurting so bad now and missing him so much. Look out for him too.

Mama loves y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

These last few days all I seem to do is cry, for all the Cush pups, past, present, future and their parents. Mostly I cry for me and you, Tia, my precious angel. It's coming up on the one year mark and I'm wondering how in the name of God am I going to get through that day. Oh Baby Girl I miss you so much. My angel. My precious precious angel. Send Mama some love and please let me have the strength to get through that day.

Mama loves you both.

[molly muffin]

Sending you big hugs Donna!

Sharlene and molly muffin

[mcdavis]

Just to let you know that we are thinking of you and your babies.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Thank y'all so much for the kind words. I was just telling Celeste that I didn't get much sleep last night and I have a massive headache. I've cried pretty much all night thinking about my last few days with Tia. Reliving every moment of that weekend, begging her not to leave me and begging God not to take her from me.

Have a good weekend. It's supposed to rain here.

Mama loves you girls.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

Mama loves and misses y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my sweet angels.

I can hardly believe tomorrow will be one year since I lost you my precious angel. My heart hurts.

Mama love y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my precious angels.

The hardest year Mama has ever had. I love you girls and I miss you both more than I could ever put into words.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my precious angels.

When I post here, it's from the heart and those words can't be recreated... Mama loves and misses y'all.

[gatorgirl_bama]

Another Christmas without you my littlest angel and our first without Mama Tippi and I must say it's been almost unbearable. I put the tree up this year and cried the entire time I was decorating it just knowing my most beautiful present wouldn't be laying under it. I miss you girls. Merry Christmas my precious angels.

Mama loves y'all.

[molly muffin]

Thinking of you, tank, tanzee tippi and Tia this Christmas and wishing you all the best.

Hugs

[gatorgirl_bama]

Good morning my precious girls.

It's hard to believe that one year ago Miss Tippi you went to the Bridge to be with Tia. This has been the hardest year of my life being without both of my girls. My heart still aches and I still cry just hearing your names. Brandon even got choked up at Christmas taking about y'all. You both gave this family such unconditional love. You'll always be our girls.

Mama loves and misses y'all.

[labblab]

Thinking of you and your angels, Donna. And sending you giant hugs across the miles.

Always in loving memory of your precious girls ~
Marianne

[gatorgirl_bama]

Happy New Year my precious angels. I miss you both so much.

Mama loves y'all.