PDA

View Full Version : My precious Tasha



Squirt's Mom
12-03-2012, 12:26 PM
Tasha and I first met about 10 months ago. I was at the vet’s when this tiny cute Boston came prancing down the hall. I asked her if she had escaped and one of the techs told me she was staying with them for a while. Her mom had passed away recently and the kids had dumped Tasha at the clinic. We talked a minute and I told her if weren’t living in the camper I would take her, foster her for them and try to find her a new home. Not long after, I knew we would be moving soon so the next time we were at the clinic I told Doc I would take Tasha as soon as we moved. He told me she had already been given a home by another client. Happy for that sweet girl!

A week or so after we moved into our home, we were at the clinic again. When I walked in the door, one of the techs said, “Guess who’s back? Tasha.” She had been returned and the reason depends on who you talk to –either she couldn’t get along with the ladies other dog, or she snapped at her toddler, neither of which I believe for one second. Tasha would come home with us that day until I found her a new home. As we were checking out, I ran my hands over her and noticed lumps, hard knots, on her belly. Doc said they were probably mammary cysts – she had never been spayed. Her medical records were sketchy, mostly allergy and yearly shots, they said she was about 12 and weighed 12 lbs. Her little tail was either deformed or butchered when docked; it was corkscrewed into the flesh of her rear, a source of much irritation and itching. They told me she was a little hard of hearing but she was basically deaf. I saw her react twice to sounds – a deep boom and the squeal of metal on metal. She had an eye injury that wasn’t healing well and she eventually lost sight in that eye.

She naturally felt misplaced when she first came to us and several times shot out the door as it opened, rapidly, purposefully trotting down the street. The first time this happened, I thought I would never catch her because she couldn’t hear me but she suddenly made a right hand turn onto a neighbor’s sidewalk. She pranced down the walk, up the steps onto the porch, and then stood at the front door staring with this hopeful look on her face. From then on, it was a battle to open the door and keep her inside. She got away a few more times and each time made a beeline to the same neighbor and would wait, staring at the door with that same hope in her eyes. I later learned that neighbor is dying of cancer so I decided there is a scent coming from that house she recognized and went there hoping her mom would open the door. Once the fence was up and she could roam free in safety, it became apparent she had always been on a leash when outside but learned to enjoy her time in the yard.

Tash settled in and was soon entertaining me daily with her goofy ways, constant desire to play, giggle bellies, leaps and bounces, and her hilarious sit-n-spins. She was a proficient, prolific nest builder and there were always rounds of blankets throughout the house where she had been constructing her nests. She would also hide in the blankets and pillows. I would look and look for her only to finally see that black and white face peeking out from under a pillow, grinning like she was really enjoying her game of hide and seek. Her little square face kept me in stitches. It was so very expressive Jim Cary should be jealous. Tasha was magic. I have a friend who is not a dog person at all; she’s a cat person through and through. But, she would come over just to look at Tasha and before long was sitting on her couch with her playing giggle bellies, both of them grinning from ear to ear. Tasha had a gift of knowing how to touch people, all kinds of people. We would go to PetCo and as we met folks their faces would light up in a big smile when Tasha looked at them. I could look over my shoulder and see folks staring after her, still smiling, eyes shining. Children were drawn to her and her to them. You could just see the giddy oozing out of all of them whenever she got to be around kids. Tasha had so many gifts and she shared them all freely.

Not long after she came to us, I noticed drops of bright red blood of the floor. Thinking someone had cut a paw, I checked everyone out but no cuts – nothing on any of them. Weird. It happened several more times and I could never find the source. One day I picked Tash up to love on her a bit and when I put her down, my hand felt damp. I looked; blood. Thinking she had an injury, I checked her belly for a scrape or cut – nothing, tho I could see where blood had smeared on her belly. Shortly after, I saw a large, fresh blood soak on the couch cushion where she had just been laying. I looked at her belly again and this time I saw a drop of blood hanging from one nipple. In further checking, I found two nipples that were leaking, one fairly steadily. Off to the vet we go.

X-rays showed several masses in her abdomen and chest as well as the mammarys. Probably more than cysts, said Doc. Subsequent x-rays showed steady growth of the masses. As the mass either in or on the lungs grew her respiration worsened. After a couple of rounds of pred starting high and tapering off, she started taking it every other day. This helped for a little while, then Lasix was added when CHF was added to the mix and that brought added relief. In time, she started coughing at night so she started taking Hydrocodone cough syrup at bedtime. She would cough up white slimy foam at times in spite of the meds. By now, she was taking pred daily. Soon she required more help breathing and she was put on a round of Temaril-P, which did wonders for her almost immediately so the pred was cut back to every other day again. Then that effect started wearing off and she needed the daily pred and cough syrup again, yet still hacked and wheezed. So I called and she was given another round of the Temaril-P. Again, it worked like a charm and fast. Two days later, she woke up disoriented then had a seizure after seeing the vet that same day.

I had decided on the way home that day if she wasn’t significantly improved by morning, I would let her go. I had also convinced myself on the sly that this was no biggie – “I can handle confusion.” When she seized, the blinders fell from my eyes and I knew. This sweet angel was ready to see her first mom.

Food and giggle bellies were about her only joys these days and the giggle bellies made her very short-winded and increased the bleeding so they have been limited, as has her diet. But Sat. and Sun. she got anything and everything she wanted to eat and several sessions of giggle belly to boot. She had salmon, turkey, beef and calf liver, chicken hearts, peanut butter, cheese, cheese and crackers, PetCo treats galore, cod, sweet potato fries, broccoli/cheese/rice, Pork & Beans, bean and cheese sandwich, and vanilla ice cream. She loved every single bite. If you have never seen a Boston Terrier eat peanut butter, put it on your bucket list right now. The sight brought sobs and laughter in equal measure.

I put her on her lead to walk to the mailbox like we sometimes do but she was too winded by the end of the drive so we took a slow meander around the front yard instead. She tried to eat a rock and when I took it out of her mouth like I have 1000’s of others, I broke down. I laid the rock back on the ground and Tasha promptly swallowed it down with glee. We both felt better for it. She always resented me taking her yummy rocks away.

She slept most of the day and was restless at night, pacing, standing and staring, then pacing some more. During her waking daytime hours, all the dogs would gather where ever I happened to be. Usually they are each about their various activities but this weekend they knew our family needed to be together, and we were. Tasha never went outside by herself this weekend; one of them always went with her without coaxing. While Sorrow was ever present, there was Healing in our home as well this weekend.

Doc was ready when we got there this morning, with big tears in his eyes. We had the place to ourselves. He talked to me a minute about her and what to expect, then played with her for few minutes. He looked up at me and said, “You know, I love this little dog, too. She is the cutest and sweetest Boston I ever met.” We went into the exam room and they had a blanket laid out on the table for her. The injection was given and I help her in my arms as she drew her last breaths. Doc couldn’t stay, he ran out with tears flowing. The techs left us so we could be alone. Tasha drifted off peacefully, held against my heart, my tears bathing her body. I felt an outpouring of love from her and knew she was alright. I told her I loved her and thanked her for being part of my life.

Doc is going to take Tash to be laid to rest with her first mom, as were her wishes. Her human children did Tasha wrong but if the situation were reversed and someone else was caring for Squirt in my stead, I would want my final wishes honored regardless of how my family may have acted. As a mother, I completely understand. I know her mom was waiting on her with arms flung wide open, tears of joy coursing down her cheeks, as Tasha raced toward her.
Tasha came into my little world like the proverbial candle in the wind; struggling against insurmountable odds yet shining her Light in all directions brightly. I feel incredibly blessed to have shared in a small portion of her life.

Fly free, my precious angel, fly free.

clydetheboosmom
12-03-2012, 01:25 PM
An amazing tribute from an amazing lady. XO

molly muffin
12-03-2012, 01:50 PM
Leslie, that is just a beautiful tribute to Tasha. I'm really glad I came home form the office and didn't read this at work though because I can't seem to stop bawling for Tasha, who I know is free and you for being the wonderful person that you are. It's both inspirational and so sad and yet happy too. I don't know how so many emotions can be so mixed up and happening at the same time.

Hugs,
Sharlene and Molly Muffin

BestBuddy
12-03-2012, 04:43 PM
Dear Les,

Tasha was so lucky you happened upon her at the vets that day. Instead of being sad and lonely you gave her the the home and love she deserved for her last days. It was her time. Fly free little girl.

Jenny

lulusmom
12-03-2012, 05:00 PM
Leslie, that was an incredibly beautiful tribute to Sasha and my eyes have been wet more than dry since we spoke yesterday. My heart is always with you, my dear sweet friend, but it is beating as one with yours today.

Godspeed sweet Tasha

((((Huge Consoling Hugs))))

Jenny & Judi in MN
12-03-2012, 05:35 PM
Beautiful. thanks for sharing Tasha with us. I'm sure her first Mom is thanking her lucky stars that she found you. Judi

cheydogger
12-03-2012, 05:45 PM
Such a beautiful tribute to Tasha. I have said this before, but I am so glad someone as loving and caring as you saw her through her last months. You are truly amazing for giving Tasha the love she so needed and deserved. Bless her heart and wings.

Hugs,

Ro

Bo's Mom
12-03-2012, 06:57 PM
Oh Leslie,
That was so beautifully written. I know you gave Tasha the best and she definitely appreciated every moment. We will be watching for Tasha in the Heavens as she makes her paw prints all over the sky. Fly free, Angel Tasha....we will miss you but you will live in our hearts forever.

frijole
12-03-2012, 09:29 PM
Go get em Tasha, run with the wind, give them hell, enjoy your new freedom from pain and know that you were so deeply loved by your dear mom Leslie but also by a group of friends with whom she shared your story. We are blessed to have been a chapter in your life Tasha.

Leslie you are a saint. I'm blessed to know you.

Kim

Skye
12-04-2012, 12:20 AM
tears are blinding me as i type this to you..........the knot in my throat is near unbearable. Wanting to embrace you........what a beautiful beautiful heart and soul you are. How incredible the way you express the bond shared. I dont have the words to express the emotions my heart is holding.
as she raced towards her first mom.......she was telling her all about this beautiful angel who mothered her till they were joined again.

mypuppy
12-04-2012, 06:43 AM
:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:( :(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:( :(:(

We love you Tasha and Leslie & babes..

Skye
12-04-2012, 12:39 PM
Leslie....
Janis has not had moment to post to you.....she asked that i let you know she is thinking of you....and ". Please please please.. Would you send my deepest sympathy to Leslie!! "

your a beautiful soul Leslie..........with love as true as everything beautiful.

cheydogger
12-04-2012, 01:36 PM
Leslie-

Are you doing ok?

Sending healing prayers your way.

Ro

Maya
12-04-2012, 02:54 PM
Absolutely beautiful......

Boriss McCall
12-05-2012, 12:03 PM
Simply Beautiful

Squirt's Mom
12-05-2012, 01:58 PM
Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

The last two days have been tough. As much as I tried to prepare myself, there were things I didn't consider. Like how different it would be without her sounds. Today I had to go to the vet's and pick up some Proin for Squirt - hadn't considered having to walk back in that door so soon either.

I won't be on the site much for a bit. I need time to heal, to find my life again, to be present with and for my other babies. That doesn't mean I won't be peeking in on you all from the outside or that I won't pop in from time to time tho.

You all mean the world to me, ya know.
Hugs,
Leslie

molly muffin
12-05-2012, 03:07 PM
Hi Leslie, and hugs, we totally get it. None of this is easy for you. I know that you will surround yourself with love and your little furbabies, who will heal you in a way no one or thing else possibly can. We're here whenever you want us.
Super big hugs,
Sharlene and Molly Muffin

Harley PoMMom
12-05-2012, 03:18 PM
Tons of love and hugs being sent your way, Lori

Roxee's Dad
12-05-2012, 06:58 PM
More (((HUGS))) from our home too....

Bo's Mom
12-05-2012, 07:02 PM
Leslie,
We totally understand. Texas-sized (((((HUGS)))) from our home to yours.

apollo6
12-07-2012, 07:39 PM
Just know I gave her the best in the last part of her life. May sweet Tasha look down on you and give her kisses.
Hugs Sonja and Angel Apollo

mypuppy
12-08-2012, 08:56 AM
Leslie and babies,

Thinking of you this Saturday morn.

With much love.

xo Jeanette and my Princess

Bo's Mom
12-08-2012, 08:57 PM
(((((hugs))))

Squirt's Mom
01-24-2013, 06:21 PM
Going through the nightly bedtime routine tonite, I noticed the water bowl in the kitchen was only half full and thought, "Tasha will drink all of that and want more before morning." So I picked up the bowl, washed it out, refilled it and turned to the LR to tell Tash she would have plenty of fresh water for the night....and saw all the Christmas totes on the couch instead of her. :(

Bo's Mom
01-24-2013, 06:45 PM
(((((HUGS)))))...I know that had to be hard.

molly muffin
01-24-2013, 07:32 PM
Just when you think that you are starting to accept what is, something happens and you remember what isn't.
Hugs Leslie.

Sharlene and Molly Muffin

Harley PoMMom
01-24-2013, 10:46 PM
Sending huge and loving hugs to you.

Simba's Mom
01-24-2013, 11:36 PM
Sending hugs and prayers, what a beautiful tribute to your little Tasha! What a great Mom you are!

Trish
01-25-2013, 05:40 AM
Aww Leslie, those moments sure do catch in your throat. Lots of hugs xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Squirt's Mom
12-02-2013, 11:24 AM
My precious little Tash,

It’s been a year since you flew to your mom’s arms and you are missed each and every day. I still hear you prancing down the hall so often and look, fully expecting to see your funny little square face grinning at me there. I still find myself looking at the couch to check on you – a piece of furniture that has just recently become “the” couch and not “Tasha’s” couch. The box where your bowl was placed is still in its spot beside Brick’s plate, your beds are still on the floor where Trinket is often to be found. This morning Sophie came trotting down the hall with your yellow rubber bar toy in her mouth – I have no idea where it has been all this time but she found it this morning and has been having a blast with it just as you used to. Your blankets now wrap Grace’s crate and pad her bed to keep her warm. You are still so much a part of my home and heart…and always will be.

I know you are so happy to be with your mom again and she with you. What joy must have been on both your faces as you took that final step from The Bridge into her arms. And I know Gia was just behind your mom waiting her turn to hug her new sister. In my mind’s eye, there was a great host there to greet you that day, both two and four-legged. You brought so much joy and laughter and comfort to everyone you met I know there were many waiting just for you that day. I hope you are getting giggle bellies galore.

Just as I know Gia is always there at the end of The Bridge, I also know you were there to greet Josie as she came Home to her mom, as well as each one that has Crossed since and who will Cross in the time to come. At times I imagine you and Crys clowning around as you wait, or you peering out from underneath her belly because she would let you do that and you would find it quite entertaining. I can often hear Gia laughing as she watches. As much as it pains me to lose each and every one no matter how long they have been here it is an immeasurable comfort to know they have such a wonderful gang waiting for them.

You were such a blessing in my life and continue to give from across the Divide. Thank you for sharing a brief time with me. You will never be forgotten, Tasha. Each baby that comes, deepens the pawprint you left on my Soul.

A big ole giggle belly is on its way to you from me!
My love always,
Mom #2

molly muffin
12-02-2013, 05:43 PM
{{{ Leslie}}} Tasha, you are loved and missed.

Sharlene and Molly Muffin

Harley PoMMom
12-02-2013, 06:37 PM
((((Sending you huge and loving hugs))))

Budster's Mom
12-02-2013, 09:52 PM
((((((((((hugs))))))))))

scoora
12-03-2013, 12:25 AM
Leslie,
BIG HUGS

gatorgirl_bama
12-04-2013, 07:23 AM
Dear God. Now I am crying so hard for you and Tasha and can hardly see to type. Leslie, you are amazing and have a way with words. I hung on in hopes of a joyous long life for Tasha and then the drops of blood took my breath. Bless your heart and bless Tasha.

Donna