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annie
05-11-2012, 01:17 PM
Koby went to the Bridge on 5/9/12. It's very hard for me to talk about it, still so many tears and heartache. Hopefully soon I'll post with more.

Annie

Bo's Mom
05-11-2012, 05:17 PM
Annie,
You take your time. It is very obvious that you are feeling pain from the loss of your dear Koby. Just know that we are all here for you when you feel ready to share. Hugs to you and your family.

frijole
05-11-2012, 07:32 PM
Just posting to give you a hug and let you know we are thinking of you as you adjust. Koby is now an angel and surrounded by all of our loved ones, including my angel whose name is Annie! Post when you are up to it - we know it takes alot of time to heal. Kim

mytil
05-12-2012, 06:52 AM
My continued ((((hugs)))) to you. Grieving takes time and there are not set rules. Like the others have said, take your time.

Terry

marie adams
05-12-2012, 10:26 AM
Dear Annie,

I am so sorry for your loss of Koby. It is a hard thing to do letting go...most all of us know this. Please know Koby is in good hands now with all of our angels. Koby will always be in your heart to remember.

Take care!!!

annie
05-12-2012, 11:47 AM
Thanks to everyone here.

There are so many things to remember about Koby. We got him from a local shelter when he was two, and we couldn’t have asked for a more loyal and loving companion.

He loved walks, his toys, sitting in the front window on a platform we built specially for him so he could look out. After 9/11, I knew I would never fly again. I convinced my husband to buy a small RV so we could take trips and try some camping. All this with Koby in mind. And Koby loved it. Packing up and getting ready for a trip was all the sign he needed to drag his leash over, ready to go. That will be no more, so we have decided to try and sell the RV. Just would not be the same “traveling doghouse” without him. So many, many more good memories.

All we know is life will not be the same. I haven’t been able to stop crying yet, keep looking for him. My husband is a strong person, does not show emotion outwardly. But Wednesday evening he finally broke down and just sobbed.

The last days will haunt me forever. Without a lot of detail, after an ultra-sound and x-rays, the vet said he had a very enlarged liver, possibly a tumor, pancreatitus, possibly a tumor on the pancreas also. Not much hope. We were shocked as this seemed to come so suddenly. We took him to another clinic and hour away for another diagnosis. We were told basically the same thing, not to let him suffer as he was in pain. He was put on pain meds and like I said, the last few days with him will forever haunt me.

So sadly ends the life of this wonderful pet. And so sadly ends our happy life as we knew it.

Rest in peace sweet puppy, till we meet again. Hugs and kisses on the nose........


Annie

deena
05-12-2012, 11:51 AM
Big paw hugs!!!to you, as you learn to let go and know your koby is an angel now playin with all our angels over the rainbow bridge.... No words can truly express the loss you feel but we are not alone......deena

k9diabetes
05-12-2012, 01:59 PM
Annie... I'm so very sorry. It is especially hard when you suddenly get such terrible news - the shock is overwhelming. Sadly, sometimes diabetes is a symptom of something terrible rather than the main problem.

We lost our diabetic to cancer but it was after a long period of his being frail and two weeks after his diagnosis of what was probably not the main tumor. We had some time to prepare ourselves for that day, for which I am thankful. It's hard for me to imagine losing him as suddenly as you did Koby.

He was obviously a beloved member of your family and that is the greatest gift you could ever give Koby, followed by the courage to release him from pain.

With deepest sympathy,

Natalie

annie
05-13-2012, 06:08 PM
Today on Mother's Day I received three special gifts. A dozen roses from my grandson with a nice card regarding our loss of Koby. My husband bought a star to be named after Koby. And a friend of mine sent me these words. Sorry for being a little long. This day was only missing one special thing.
Annie

LIVING LOVE

If you ever love an animal, there are three days in your life you will always remember...

The first is a day, blessed with happiness, when you bring home your young new friend. You may have spent weeks deciding on a breed. You may have asked numerous opinions of many vets, or done long research in finding a breeder.

Or, perhaps in a fleeting moment, you may have just chosen that silly looking animal in a shelter - simply because something in its eyes reached your heart. But when you bring that chosen pet home, and watch it explore, and claim its special place in your hall or front room - and when you feel it brush against you for the first time - it instills a feeling of pure love you will carry with you through the many years to come.

The second day will occur eight or nine or ten years later. It will be a day like any other. Routine and unexceptional. But, for a surprising instant, you will look at your longtime friend and see age where you once saw youth. You will see slow deliberate steps where you once saw energy. And you will see sleep where you once saw activity. So you will begin to adjust your friend's diet - and you may add a pill or two to her food. And you may feel a growing fear deep within yourself, which bodes of a coming emptiness. And you will feel this uneasy feeling, on and off, until the third day finally arrives.

And on this day, if your friend and God have not decided for you, you will be faced with making a decision of your own - on behalf of your lifelong friend, and with the guidance of your own deepest Spirit. But whichever way your friend eventually leaves you, you will feel as alone as a single star in the dark night.

If you are wise, you will let the tears flow as freely and as often as they must. And if you are typical, you will find that not many in your circle of family or friends will be able to understand your grief, or comfort you.

But if you are true to the love of the pet you cherished through the many joy-filled years, you may find that a soul - a bit smaller in size than your own - seems to walk with you, at times, during the lonely days to come. And at moments when you least expect anything out of the ordinary to happen, you may feel something brush against your leg - very very lightly. And looking down at the place where your dear, perhaps dearest, friend used to lay - you will remember those three significant days.

The memory will most likely be painful, and leave an ache in your heart. As time passes the ache will come and go as it has a life of its own. You will both reject it and embrace it, and it may confuse you. If you reject it, it will depress you. If you embrace it, it will deepen you. Either way, it will still be an ache.

But there will be, I assure you, a fourth day when - along with the memory of your pet, and piercing through the heaviness in your heart - there will come a realization that belongs only to you. It will be as unique and strong as our relationship with each animal we have loved, and lost. This realization takes the form of a Living Love - like the heavenly scent of a rose that remains after the petals have wilted, this Love will remain and grow - and be there for us to remember.

It is a love we have earned. It is the legacy our pets leave us when they go. And it is a gift we may keep with us as long as we live. It is a Love which is ours alone. And until we ourselves leave, perhaps to join our Beloved Pets - it is a Love that we will always possess.

frijole
05-13-2012, 06:25 PM
Thanks Annie. That was beautiful. Kim

Jenny & Judi in MN
05-13-2012, 07:12 PM
Annie: I love Koby's pictures. He looked like a very well loved contented boy. Loved him in his recliner waiting for a belly rub. Just remember there is not a family that could have loved him more and I think he knew that.

hugs, Judi

annie
05-14-2012, 02:54 PM
It's a beautiful, warm and sunny day here, but again a sad one. Koby took his last ride today, we brought his ashes home.

I will now go and say a prayer for him and all those who have gone ahead before us.

Annie