sunny
07-21-2011, 02:59 PM
The pain is still too intense to say all the things that made you so special and such a blessing to my life. You already know anyway. That's the kind of girl you are. Always understanding and "knowing" things that truly amazed me and make me know you are no ordinary dog. From the moment I first saw you leaning against the bars of your cage at the ARFanage, I knew you belonged with me. And so did you. You have been right next to me the past 7 years, following me from room to room and just lying close by. That's all you really seem to want was to just be near me, like that was what you were sent here for..your mission on this earth...
. I had prayed for the right doggie to come along for our Kim who was only 7 when she lost her dad and had always been timid around dogs. She was 10 when we found you, and you were likely around 4, with signs you had at one time had babies of your own. I often wonder what became of those babies and often said how special they must have been with a tender hearted mother like you. When I told the people at the Arfanage that I was looking for a girl that my daughter would not be afraid of, she said, I have just the girl for you, that you werent a puppy but had the most gentle disposition of any dog she had ever come across. When we met I found myself wondering how you could still be there. You were beautiful inside and out and a treasure beyond imaging..I came to know that you were still there because you were waiting for your true mom to come and find you and take you to your real home. It was almost like the feeling you may get in life when you meet someone for the first time but have that overwhelming feeling that you have known this person all your life, or maybe even longer... It's that feeling of finally being at "home"... I had prayed for a good dog for my girl and ending up with a blessing beyond words...I was lonely and you came to fill up my heart and my life with the dearest companionship I have ever known. ALways there by my side. I could always reach over and feel you silky coat or see you lying at my feet. I remember how I would look into those soulful eyes and see my father's face, and I thought maybe you were sent by both my mother and my father who were such true animal lovers when they were alive, to keep me from missing them so much.You would just look at me and there was a connection that let me know you were something special and sent to me by God to be with me and just make me feel this indescribable love. When I was years later going through things with your Kim, then a teenager, I remember losing my temper and yelling at her across the house. You then came to me and began to tremble, not like you were afraid of me or the noise I made, but just to make me aware of what I was doing and calm down. You had been having seizures since shortly after I adopted you and I was so afraid you would have them, I immediately gathered up my composure and calmed down. You would also do this if I was crying about something. You were always so super sensitive to everything I was feeling...
Whenever you felt a seizure coming on, you would stagger down the hall to where I was so I could be there for you while you were seizing, holding you and telling you everything would be alright soon.
I had also learned you had been heartworm positive right after I adopted you and that you had been given the first of two shots to cure you. It had since been banned so you were left not fully cured and probably suffered from the seizures because of it. Then you developed the Cushings symtoms almost two years ago and I made the best decisions I could regarding your treatment so you quality of life would not suffer. .
All along this journey with you I remember some of your comical and smart antics that kept us all laughing and amazed. Like how you would go stand by the refrierator and paw at it and then look over at me expectantly demanding that I get up and walk over open the door and get you out a treat, usually an additive free hotdog... Or the way I would hear this clang clang noise and you would be standing by your metal water dish pawing at it and once again looking all alert and straight at me waiting for me to get over there and fill it up for you. Your gaze was so intense and unrelenting I had to always laugh...
And then there was that strategy you used when all else failed..you would go to the back door and stand there looking and me and making that insistent "harumph" noise, telling me to get up already and take you outside to take care of business. Well, I would get up walk toward where you were standing and you would then dart past me into the nearby kitchen and dance in front of the refrigerator again. Yes, you were a very intelligent girl...and it worked everytime. I would scold you, but you know I loved it and loved you. Sometimes I would be sitting here on the laptop and would hear the tap tap tapping of your little feet on the floor only to look up and see you hopping around with eyes dead on me, sometimes, even peering around the corner of the dividing counter once again demanding I get up and come give you some prize from the kitchen.All this was even more funny because you were always such a calm, laid back kind of girl, and all that energy seem to come out of nowhere and transform you into this ball of energy..
You have been my comfort and my constant companion all these years, "puppy girl", or" hootie bear", as I would call you..(you seemed to like the sound of it) and I have been yours. I'm so so sorry I couldnt save you this last time and know you dont hold it against me because your love is unconditional. I may have missed the chance to give us more time together by my mistakes, but I thank God I was there with you stroking that soft coat and looking into those weary eyes when God called you home. I know you will greet me someday and become all full of energy once again as you rush to great me. In the meantime I will think of you and love you every day of my life and be so grateful you decided to come into my life and love me. I am blessed beyond words to have shared these years with you and will always consider my Sunny Girl to be one of my greatest blessings. I see your sweet spirit everywhere and can't help thinking you are still around me trying to keep me company. I love you puppy girl...you're my heart.
. I had prayed for the right doggie to come along for our Kim who was only 7 when she lost her dad and had always been timid around dogs. She was 10 when we found you, and you were likely around 4, with signs you had at one time had babies of your own. I often wonder what became of those babies and often said how special they must have been with a tender hearted mother like you. When I told the people at the Arfanage that I was looking for a girl that my daughter would not be afraid of, she said, I have just the girl for you, that you werent a puppy but had the most gentle disposition of any dog she had ever come across. When we met I found myself wondering how you could still be there. You were beautiful inside and out and a treasure beyond imaging..I came to know that you were still there because you were waiting for your true mom to come and find you and take you to your real home. It was almost like the feeling you may get in life when you meet someone for the first time but have that overwhelming feeling that you have known this person all your life, or maybe even longer... It's that feeling of finally being at "home"... I had prayed for a good dog for my girl and ending up with a blessing beyond words...I was lonely and you came to fill up my heart and my life with the dearest companionship I have ever known. ALways there by my side. I could always reach over and feel you silky coat or see you lying at my feet. I remember how I would look into those soulful eyes and see my father's face, and I thought maybe you were sent by both my mother and my father who were such true animal lovers when they were alive, to keep me from missing them so much.You would just look at me and there was a connection that let me know you were something special and sent to me by God to be with me and just make me feel this indescribable love. When I was years later going through things with your Kim, then a teenager, I remember losing my temper and yelling at her across the house. You then came to me and began to tremble, not like you were afraid of me or the noise I made, but just to make me aware of what I was doing and calm down. You had been having seizures since shortly after I adopted you and I was so afraid you would have them, I immediately gathered up my composure and calmed down. You would also do this if I was crying about something. You were always so super sensitive to everything I was feeling...
Whenever you felt a seizure coming on, you would stagger down the hall to where I was so I could be there for you while you were seizing, holding you and telling you everything would be alright soon.
I had also learned you had been heartworm positive right after I adopted you and that you had been given the first of two shots to cure you. It had since been banned so you were left not fully cured and probably suffered from the seizures because of it. Then you developed the Cushings symtoms almost two years ago and I made the best decisions I could regarding your treatment so you quality of life would not suffer. .
All along this journey with you I remember some of your comical and smart antics that kept us all laughing and amazed. Like how you would go stand by the refrierator and paw at it and then look over at me expectantly demanding that I get up and walk over open the door and get you out a treat, usually an additive free hotdog... Or the way I would hear this clang clang noise and you would be standing by your metal water dish pawing at it and once again looking all alert and straight at me waiting for me to get over there and fill it up for you. Your gaze was so intense and unrelenting I had to always laugh...
And then there was that strategy you used when all else failed..you would go to the back door and stand there looking and me and making that insistent "harumph" noise, telling me to get up already and take you outside to take care of business. Well, I would get up walk toward where you were standing and you would then dart past me into the nearby kitchen and dance in front of the refrigerator again. Yes, you were a very intelligent girl...and it worked everytime. I would scold you, but you know I loved it and loved you. Sometimes I would be sitting here on the laptop and would hear the tap tap tapping of your little feet on the floor only to look up and see you hopping around with eyes dead on me, sometimes, even peering around the corner of the dividing counter once again demanding I get up and come give you some prize from the kitchen.All this was even more funny because you were always such a calm, laid back kind of girl, and all that energy seem to come out of nowhere and transform you into this ball of energy..
You have been my comfort and my constant companion all these years, "puppy girl", or" hootie bear", as I would call you..(you seemed to like the sound of it) and I have been yours. I'm so so sorry I couldnt save you this last time and know you dont hold it against me because your love is unconditional. I may have missed the chance to give us more time together by my mistakes, but I thank God I was there with you stroking that soft coat and looking into those weary eyes when God called you home. I know you will greet me someday and become all full of energy once again as you rush to great me. In the meantime I will think of you and love you every day of my life and be so grateful you decided to come into my life and love me. I am blessed beyond words to have shared these years with you and will always consider my Sunny Girl to be one of my greatest blessings. I see your sweet spirit everywhere and can't help thinking you are still around me trying to keep me company. I love you puppy girl...you're my heart.